


Sightless

by artemisfae



Category: The Blacklist (TV)
Genre: F/M, Romance, Suspense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-01
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-04-02 07:02:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 30
Words: 46,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4050670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artemisfae/pseuds/artemisfae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lizzington. AU, Red is still the concierge of crime, and Liz is an active criminal profiler. Ressler is still her partner during their infrequent field work. Red and Liz still have a history. Red and Liz meet in a coffee shop one afternoon, while Liz is reading reports. Liz has no idea who she’s meeting because of one small difference; she’s blind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Multi-chapter fic. Lizzington. Canon as far as ages and relative positions in the Blacklist Universe. Liz is already a successful and respected profiler. Ressler is her partner. Red is still a criminal.

Liz sat on the uncomfortable outdoor patio of the coffee shop down the block from her apartment. She had a new file to go over and a profile to create, but chose to indulge in the smooth bitterness of her caffeinated drink before she even attempted to crawl into the mind of a serial killer.

She was nearly done and lamented her return to reality when she felt the air near her change. She rustling of clothing announced her visitor long before his “Good Morning, do you mind if I sit here? It’s so beautiful outside and all of the other seats are taken.”

She shivered at the sound of his voice. The vibration and timbre combined into the most hypnotizing sound she’d ever heard.

“Miss, do you mind?” _What?_ Oh. She forgot to actually answer the question.

“No, sure, you’re fine. Sit. Sit.” _Sit and talk to me please. Your voice is…orgasmic._ It felt as if she’d heard it before. It was safety. It sounded like…home. _Wow, Liz, you need to get out more._

“Thank you. The light hits the trees so spectacularly from out here. The shadows they cast look like Tolkien’s great Tree Ent’s threatening to exact vengeance on the masses. Because if there was ever a time where trees felt the need to fight for their planet, it’s now.”

She couldn’t completely hide the bitterness from her tone when she replied “I envy you your whimsy, but I wouldn’t know.”

He seemed surprised. “You haven’t read Tolkien?”

She smirked “I’ve read all of Tolkien’s novels, I just can’t take advantage of the view. I’m blind.”

He coughed, choking on his drink. _Oops_ “I didn’t mean to catch you drinking. Sorry. I thought it was self-explanatory. I’m sitting here with a bunch of papers in braille and I have a cane propped up next to the table here. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“No!, God, no. I was just surprised. I was enjoying…the view, and would have noticed if I wasn’t so distracted by the absolute beauty of it all.

“I should be the one apologizing. My name is Red, how can I make it up to you?”

He was charming and sounded genuinely contrite for his blunder.

She laughed “Red? Your mom have a thing for Crayola? Or let me guess, you’re a ginger?”

His reply was dripping with amusement “Of course not, on either account. I no affiliation with the crayon, nor do I steal souls.”

He was so funny, her face hurt from laughing “My partner would be offended by that soul-stealing comment. And I’m Liz, by the way.”

“Your partner? As in domestic?”

“Yuck, no. I mean no, he’s not my spouse. I work for the FBI, he’s my partner.”

He sounded worried for her “You work for the FBI? As an agent? How can you? You’re-“

“I know I’m blind, but I was not always blind nor am I incompetent. I have trained in fighting for almost fifteen years. I assure you, I can take care of myself.”

Once again, his words were apologetic, low “I didn’t mean to imply that you were somehow less than…I just…how long have you been blind, if I may ask?” He was at a loss for words, it seemed.

She whispered “It was…I was a teen.”

“Someone tried to hurt you.” His voice was low, dangerous now. It made her shiver.

“Not exactly.”

He sighed, as if hoping for a different answer “The FBI is accommodating of your…god, I am curious, but I don’t want to offend you.”

She laughed again “On the contrary, I find your honesty refreshing. Usually everyone tiptoes around me like I have some infectious disease. And yes, they are a government agency so they do what they can, I suppose. I have a higher security clearance than usual because everything I have is in braille. It also doesn’t hurt that I am good at what I do”

He was still serious “What do you do with the FBI, Liz?” _His voice was like manna from heaven._ She definitely needed to get laid.

“I am a profiler. The FBI gives me the case files on cases of which they have no suspect and I create a profile based on the information so to narrow down the search and catch the bad guys. I have a ninety-five percent rate of success.”

The smile was back in his voice “Sounds impressive. Do you have a dog?”

He really was curious. “In this city, the seeing-eye dogs go to those that have troubles caring for themselves. The very young or the very old. I could always privately pay to have one trained, but I am a mere public servant with an addiction to books, and let me tell you; books in braille are anything but cheap. I will admit that one would have come in handy quite a few times while out in the field. Suspects see me as easy pickings, being a poor, blind girl, but they only make that mistake once. It do have to take an occasional hit if they are particularly stealthy, but like I said, they learn quickly. Those that don’t usually end up in the hospital.”

His laugh was low, but amused “I can’t help but think that the ginger isn’t very good at his job if someone got close enough to hit you.”

She could tell that he was upset and the danger she’s been in. _Is he attracted to me??_ “He doesn’t stick to my side all the time, I am a competent agent or I wouldn’t be in the position I’m in.”

She wanted so badly to get to know him better, but her watch vibrated to let her know she needed to get into her office “Red, I would love to sit here and talk all day, but I have a question. You can refuse, but I am also curious and well, I was wondering if you’d let me see you? I mean, touch your face.”

Her awkward request was met with silence “I’m sorry, but I just wanted to get to know the person I was speaking with and I know it sound strange-“

“Yes.” His voice was huskier, a rumble of sorts.

“Oh…Ok.”

He leaned forward towards her and took her hands. His hands were calloused, but not like a man that works with his hands daily. His thumb and forefinger had heavier calluses. Archery? Shooting? She was more and more curious by the second. His smell was heaven. He smelled like sunshine and cigars. She tentatively reached up, cupped his face in one hand and ran the fingers of the other along the planes of his face.

He was older, but not too old. He had frown lines and smile lines. His face was serene, slightly smiling.

As her fingernails glanced his hairline by his sideburns, he groaned slightly and turned his head into her hands. He froze a moment later though. She couldn’t help but feel disappointed that the moment was lost.

She withdrew her hands.

“Do you come here often?” she asked, unable to avoid leaving any longer.

“I can, if that’s what you want.” He sounded pleased that she wanted to see him again.

“I do, but I really must go. The ginger will throw a hissy fit if I’m late.” She packed up her things to the sound of his laughter. She loved the sound of his laugh.

“I’ll see you here tomorrow then. Same time, Lizzie?”

“Let’s make it a half hour earlier.” She wanted more time with him.

 

*****

 

Raymond ‘Red’ Reddington watched Elizabeth Keen walk away with so many conflicting emotions, he had no idea what to think.

There was anger, he had no idea that she was blind. This entire time he could have been using his resources to make things easier on her. Someone within his organization dropped the ball. He’d find out why.

There was lust. When she ran her hands over his face, her touch so gentle, so curious. He wasn’t expecting to find himself attracted to her. He hadn’t seen a picture of her since she was a child until yesterday. That picture was her official FBI ID badge. It didn’t do her justice. She was gorgeous. The most beautiful part was that she had no idea. So completely unaware of all the heads that turned as she walked away.

There was awe. She had overcome so much, yet persevered and even thrived in a field where having such a disability was unheard of.

There was fear. She was putting herself into untold danger day after day and he couldn’t do anything to keep her from getting harmed.

Most of all, there was tenderness. She was beautiful, witty, strong, soft, a bit prickly, and extremely intelligent. Talking to her was a balm on his damaged, broken soul.

He called Dembe to pick him up. There was much to be done before tomorrow.

 

**Tbc…**


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red finds out how Liz was blinded. Liz and Red get to know each other better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> W.O.W Thank you so much for all of the Kudos, Reviews, and PMs! You guys are too amazing for words, truly. 
> 
> Disclaimed, as usual.

Red spoke with Dembe, had him run a comprehensive background check of every single event in Elizabeth Keen’s life since he left her with Sam. More specifically, how and why she was blind. As a man who had more than his fair share of appreciation of the visual arts, he mourned for her disability.

He knew he should have checked up on her personally after leaving her with Sam. If Sam ever tried to contact him, he couldn’t tell. No one had heard anything but the news that she was alive and not in dire need.

Being blinded by a psychotic serial rapist and murderer definitely fell under the category of ‘dire need’, in his opinion. When she was 15, she attracted the attention of the bastard at the Mall near her home in Nebraska. He abducted her, held her for nearly twenty-four hours before she escaped. Unfortunately, during her escape, she was injured and blinded. It’s been 17 years of darkness for her.

She was the only one of his victims to escape and the monster was still on the loose. For now. Red vowed to take care of him, put a bullet between his eyes. After torturing him. He was somewhere here in the New England states, so he was well within Red’s range of influence.

After her attack, she was determined to become a fighter. She trained with boxers, jujitsu masters, and mixed martial artists daily. Most of them had heard her story and were more than happy to help.

He was proud of how well she had done for herself. A blind FBI agent. He knew that they were nearly all blind figuratively, but for her to actually be blind was quite an accomplishment. The FBI was notorious for hiring cookie cutter sheeple. There was nothing even remotely common about Lizzie.

 

 

He was waiting for her to arrive at the café the next morning at the very same table. He read all night long on being blind and the accommodations required to make their lives more independent and easier. Consistency was key. Even small changes could spell disaster.

He knew he was getting in to deep when he didn’t even notice her approach “Good morning Red, how are you today?”

His head snapped up “Wow, you are extremely stealthy. I am usually very difficult to sneak up on.”

He stood, remembering his manners to hold out her chair for her. “I’m stealthy like a cat. What are you doing?” she asked.

“I am trying to be a gentleman and hold your chair out for you. Two steps forward and to the left. Well, I suppose it’s your right.” She laughed. “You don’t need to treat me differently. I can find the chair, that’s what the stick if for. Comes in very handy for navigating. It’s especially useful when someone’s getting hands-y or ornery. I just hit them with the stick and say ‘Sorry, I didn’t see you there’. Works like a damn charm, every single time.”

She was still standing, but facing towards the building when he said “Do people get ornery with you often?” His frown was drawing looks from people nearby. He couldn’t care less.

She sniffed the air and turned her head to the left with a slight tip to the side “There’s a man wearing some god awful musky cologne by the door. He’s going to open the door for me when I go to get coffee. Watch and learn, stud.”

He almost missed the meaning behind her words. She called him stud. His face reddened in embarrassment, but then he concentrated on the more important issue. That man was going to touch her? He was going to pound him to the ground.

Sure enough, the man opened the door for Lizzie and put his hand on the small of her back. As she walked by, he left his hand wander down to her behind. She turned around quickly, her cane slamming forcefully into his shins. He yelped in pain, but her “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you standing that closely.” Earned a fumbling apology from the man.

When Lizzie returned, he looked up at her “You were right. But he won’t be doing that again, I promise you that. I’m going to kill him.”

She laughed. “Don’t give away your plans, I am an officer of the law and will have to testify against you.”

It was adorable that she thought he was joking “Well I guess you’ll just have to marry me so that I can have spousal privilege.”

The sweet sound of her continued laughter was a balm on his soul. She was so refreshing, so open, when she had every reason to hate the world.

“I can’t marry you today, I have a ton of paper work and besides, I don’t even know your real first name, let alone your last name. I can’t marry a mystery man. However would I look at myself in the mirror afterwards?”

His bark of laughter drew heads. He loved her sense of humor!

“My first name is Raymond. You can still call me Red though. If you actually call me Raymond, I will have no idea whom you are referring to.”

“I like the name Raymond. It’s sweet. Do you mind if I go over some paperwork while we talk? I have a big case and I need to be on top of things.”

She was so beautiful, he knew he was staring at her like a smitten puppy. He would be forever grateful that she couldn’t see how pathetic he was. “Of course I don’t mind. Is there anything that I can help with? I do have experience as an investigator.”

“Well, the case is classified. I am just building a profile. I suppose that I can take your word on it for now. But know that if you are playing me, I will probably maim you and blame PMS.”

He chuckled “That is a valid legal defense now. There was a case in Texas where a woman killed her husband and her entire legal defense revolved around PMS. She was actually acquitted. Sometimes, our justice system gets it right.”

She cocked her head at him, perplexed at his statement “You seem very jaded. You should always have faith in justice, but I am impressed with your legal knowledge. How did you know about the case, the newspaper?” Her face told him she was genuinely impressed.

He snorted at her blind belief in such a flawed system and internally winced at his insensitive thought, but chose to say “I was drawn to the case, you could say. Things can never get strange enough for me, especially within the legal system. Besides, the bastard had it coming. That’s what he gets for treating the person he was supposed to treasure above all others as a punching bag.”

 

 

The vehemence behind his words made Liz smile. He was against the bullying of others. That was another point in his favor. Oh, who was she kidding, the points were so stacked in his favor, the tower was going to rival the Empire State building soon.

“He did have it coming. You are very right. Most people don’t sift through the facts and deduce that he was an abusive jerk.”

She pulled out her papers and started running her hands over the braille words quickly. “There had been multiple rapes and murders up and down the entire east coast in the past 9 months. No pattern, no MO. His victims are different from each other. Different hair, professions, weight, demographic, geographic location. None of their hometowns had any common denominator. Not race, not religion…Nothing.

The crimes were atrocious. They had no description of the man, no witnesses to any of the abductions and more importantly, no survivors. It was if this man was a wraith.

She sighed, frustrated with the lack of information she had. “It’s just that none of this is connecting. None of the victims follow a pattern.”

His voice was sure, confident “Maybe the lack of a pattern may very well be a pattern. The vast differences mean that they are more likely crimes of opportunity, not passion. The lack of a geographical pattern could be professionally linked. If you believe that a white collar guy matched your profile, maybe a traveling job like a regional manager, or salesman. If you think he’s a blue collar guy, maybe a truck driver.”

She stared at him, open mouthed “You, sir, have a frightening knowledge of the criminal mind. I am impressed. Very impressed.” He grinned at the irony and was thankful she couldn’t see him.

He had given her so much to think about and she never even revealed any actual details of the case. His mind may be very useful. “I’d love your input on a couple of other things, but it’s time for me to head out.” She could hear the adorable pout in his voice. Like a little boy. “Already?”

She giggled “Time flies when you’re having fun.”

She gathered her papers, but missed one, so he grabbed her hand and guided it over the sheet. “There’s one more. Would you mind if I escorted you to your bus stop?”

“Don’t you have to get to work too?”

“That’s the glory of being the boss, Lizzie. I say what goes.” he said an octave lower than he needed to. His voice was a rumble of deliciousness.

He was so intelligent and sweet she couldn’t turn him down, even if she wanted to, which she didn’t “I’d like that very much, Red.”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz asks Red out. Red tries to tell Lizzie that he's a criminal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the wonderful response!!!! You guys are amazing!

As they walked together towards her bus stop, they spoke of little things. Favorite places in the city, where they had travelled to.

At a cross walk, Red went to cross, but Lizzie put her hand across his chest “It doesn’t say ‘walk’ yet. You want to get hit by one of these awful drivers?”

Sure enough, he looked and she was right “How did you know that? Are you sure you’re blind?”

She huffed a laugh “Of course I’m blind. I’m not deaf though. Close your eyes, listen. What do you hear?”

“I’m not closing my eyes near a crowded intersection, there are dozens of people out here.”

She smiled “Don’t worry. Just try it. I’ll protect you.”

He was the one chuckling at her statement “I don’t doubt you could sweetheart.”

His words made her grin impossibly wide.

He sighed but said. I hear sirens in the distance. A man and a woman arguing up the block; he drank away their rent money. There’s construction somewhere behind us. That’s it. Just a bunch of noise.”

The signal changed and Lizzie said “It’s our turn to walk now.”

His eyes snapped open “How did you-“

“It’s the electrical hum of the lights on the sign. It pulsates for ‘don’t walk’ and is one continuous vibrating noise for ‘walk’. I’m not special, it’s just simple observation.”

He was in awe of her “Oh, I think you’re very special.” _That voice again._

She was so attracted to him “Would you like to go out on a date sometime?” The words spilled from her mouth before she could recall them back. Her cheeks Reddened in embarrassment. “I’m sorry, you don’t need to feel obligated to say yes, I just spoke before thinking.”

She was going to die. She couldn’t believe she asked him out. She was never that forward.

He didn’t answer right away, so she thought he was trying to let her down nicely “Forget it.”

“Hey, I’m not letting you take that back. I am just in shock. I was making sure that I didn’t have an aneurism and just hallucinate you asking me out.”

She laughed as he intended her to. He couldn’t stand the thought that she may think herself lacking in any way.

“To answer your question, I would love to go out with you. I am now trying to find the words to ask you if you’re free tonight without sounding like a desperate fool.”

Her excitement was written all over her face. She leaned into him and gave him a quick hug and squealed this tiny little sound that made him more than a little aroused.

“Yes! Absolutely yes!”

They hurried and exchanged phone numbers, so that she could call him with her address later. Her bus was coming down the block and they were unfortunately out of time.

As the bus stopped, she leaned in and kissed him, just a tiny, light peck on the cheek, but it left him dazed as if it were a lingering passionate lip lock.

 

*****

 

A few hours later he received a text from Liz

Liz- _Hey Stud, how goes it?_ She was so delightful.

Red- _I am fine. How about you?_

Liz- _I am getting ready to leave office. May not have time to chat later._

Red- _Going home early?_

Liz- _Nah, we have a lead to follow._ He hated the thought of her going out in the field.

Red- _Make sure the ginger doesn’t slip on any banana peels and looks out for you._

Liz- _;)_ Was all she replied, followed by her address and the time eight pm.

 

There was nothing he could do right now to keep her safe, and he felt powerless. Sitting and contemplating the rest of his day, he finally decided that more research and a trip to the area’s League of the Blind was in order. He called Dembe to let him know of his plans.

 

*****

Liz hated that the days were so hot. There was no way she’d be comfortable in a long sleeve shirt, yet contemplated it just the same. Their informant had been terrified and during his pleas to keep him safe and put him in Witness Protection, he grabbed her arm. She didn’t need to be able to see that he lift bruises.

She hated to be grabbed, it brought back so many memories of her time in captivity. That was really her last remaining trigger. Being grabbed was the quickest route to a broken nose, as their contact had found out.

Ressler had felt terrible, but it wasn’t his fault, the guy was nowhere near her, but lunged across the table to get to her.

 

She decided on a black satin camisole and a gauzy, chic wrap, she paired the sexy top with dark flared jeans and black stiletto booties. She felt confident in her escort so she chose the heels. Hopefully, she’d be able keep the bruise covered. She could have him threatening to kill another person.”

She touched up her makeup and added a little bit more dramatic coloring to her eyes for the evening.

Gaining the confidence in her ability to do her makeup was a hard won battle, but she hasn’t made anyone scream in fear or fall over laughing in years, so she has pretty much mastered it.

She felt anxious waiting for him. Excited in a way that she hasn’t been in years. She had been apathetic about dating in recent years, only going out on a few per year and never the same man more than once. They felt sorry for her. They treated her like an imbecile or an invalid and she had no patience for either type.

Or the thought that they’d use the blind girl for a quick lay and she wouldn’t be able to see them leaving the bed as if it were on fire.

 

*****

 

Red picked her up and introduced her to his driver “Lizzie, I’d like to introduce you to one of the nicest, most honorable men I know, Dembe. Dembe, this is my Lizzie.” She blushed that he’d called her ‘his’.

She would like to think she was more progressive than that, but it warmed her insides and left her with a need to rub her thighs together to stem the arousal pooling between her legs.

“It’s so wonderful to meet you, Dembe.” She held out her hand to shake. His grip was solid, but soft. “Likewise, Elizabeth.” He replied.

“You can call me Liz. Any friend of Red’s, is a friend of mine.” Red laughed, “I don’t have any friends. Dembe is more of a brother to me. He’s more than simply just a best friend.”

She was sad at his declaration of not having any friends. She would just have to convince him that they could be friends. Perhaps they could be more than friends.

 

*****

 

Lizzie looked stunning tonight. She wasn’t underdressed, but comfortable in an effortless show of beauty.

Their night had been wonderful and so very illuminating. He was falling fast for her.

He was also riddled with guilt. He needed to tell her who he was. He wouldn’t have such a lie of omission between them.

“Red, what’s the matter?” She was just too intuitive for her own good. And now she was going to hate him. It was probably for the best. What was he going to do, settle down, put up a white picket fence in the FBI’s back yard, with one of their agents? He was ballsy, but even he had limits.

“I am loathe to tell you, but I don’t wish to lie by omission to you. Full disclosure time.”

She smiled “Uh, oh. I knew it. You’re married.”

“Wait, what?! No. I am most certainly not married. I mean I have been married, but that hasn’t been the case in more than 25 years. We weren’t married long before… it didn’t work out for us. Why would you ask out a man that you suspected was married?”

Her dimples were showing “I think it’s because I have this deep yearning…” Her voice caused him to harden painfully “…to understand the criminal mind.” _What did she just say?_

“What are you referring to, Lizzy?”

“I am referring to the fact that I want to know you better. I want to crawl inside of you and find out what makes you tick.”

_She knew_ “You know. How long have you known?”

Her grin was reminiscent of the Cheshire cat “Since you told me your first name, Mr. Raymond. Red. Reddington.”

“So you’ve been playing me. You think to turn me in? Good luck.” He was upset that she was using him.

She laughed “Oh, I don’t think so. I would _never_ turn you in. I plan to utilize your…expertise. Maybe I can even help you out in return. I must admit though. I genuinely like you. You’ve made me laugh. Made me realize that I was merely existing, which is a shame. That is…if you’re willing to explore it?”

He laughed. “You are wildly clever. Your talents are wasted in the FBI. I have a list. The worst of the worst criminals. Not some government popularity contest. Real criminals that need to be stopped. When we’re through with the list? We’ll explore places that I promise you’ve never been before.”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red saves Liz after she is taken by The Stewmaker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, trying to stay near canon storyline even though AU. I was thinking I could make this fic last for a while. What do you think?   
> Disclaimed, as always.

One month into Red’s list and Liz thought for sure she was done for. After being shot at, gassed, nearly shot by a Chinese spy killer, and now this.

She had profiled a drug dealer and was expected to testify at his trial. Her testimony, combined with an eye-witness, would put him away for a long time.

Instead, he had her kidnapped by a man who sounded so normal, so comforting that the only thing that stopped her from believing in the false sense of security her created was his smell. He smelled of chemicals and death.

He knocked her out with a cloth over her face. She was out before she could even think of putting up a fight.

She woke slowly, but couldn’t move her arms or legs. Her breathing fast and frantic as she realized that he had paralyzed her.

After a while, the feeling came back to her limbs slowly. She flamed into him, fought him off successfully, but hadn’t counted on a guard dog the size of a small horse.

She had been drugged, tortured, and carried into a room where a tub bubbled with chemicals that made her gag. She was terrified, but she knew that if she didn’t calm down, if she let the dear take her, she would pass out soon and would be unable to do anything to help herself.

 

A sudden thud sounded in front of her. The air whooshed as something hit the floor.

“Who’s there?” her voice was shrill with terror.

She tried to run again, but only succeeded in moving her feet off of the rungs of the wheelchair. Her arms were just as useless.

Someone crouched in front of her.

“Hello, Lizzie” _Oh, god. Red._

“ _Red.”_ That’s all she could get out before she was choked with her own sobbing, breathless cries of relief. She knew he would come for her.

He repositioned her legs in the wheelchair and ran his hands up her legs, ending his journey with a squeeze to her upper thighs to comfort her. “The effects of the drugs should dissipate soon.”

She felt him move behind her to disengage the brakes on the chair. He then wheeled her out of the room, away from that horrific chemical smell.

He didn’t speak to her again, just caressed the top of her head and ran his hand down to cup her cheek. She leaned into him slightly but he pulled his hand away, leaving her to wonder what he was doing behind her.

He told a story about a farmer and Liz knew that he was referring to himself, but had no opportunity to dwell on his words because one loud cry and a large splash later and she doesn’t have to be able to see that he just killed a man.

This is the second man who has died in the name of her protection in as many weeks.

Red had a temper. It was one of the things she liked best about him. She knew that he would saw off his arm before hurting her.

She heard Red walk through the cabin to stand in front of her. “The FBI is on their way Lizzie. I can take you away from here or I can leave you here and Agent Ressler can take care of everything” _Of you_ , he meant.

She shook her head, “You.”

His smile was rueful “I figured. I always want you to have a choice, Lizzie.” With that he wheeled her outside a ways from the cabin where she assumed Dembe was waiting.

He waved off Dembe’s offer of assistance and lifted her into the seat. He stood and entered the other side of the vehicle after a few moments.

She leaned her body towards him and he must have known what she wanted because he put his arm around her, rubbed her arm gently.

He still hadn’t spoken, but she knew he was either enraged or afraid by the way his muscles quaked under the weight of her against him. Maybe it was a little bit of both.

 

*****

 

He was so relieved he shook with the need to take her into his arms.

Though they had grown close, friends even, but he was careful to keep the lines in the sand firmly drawn. She would go to the office and deliver his leads and open new cases as the previous ones were solved. She would leave work and meet him at her house where she would cook a simple dinner or he would order food and have if delivered, which was usually the case.

No matter how much he wanted her, there was no room for his lack of control.

Already well-known within the FBI, she was becoming infamous for providing insight that brought down four on his list and two on hers. For six big success stories in only a month’s time, she was currently the FBI’s darling. The poster child of how ADA compliant the government was. They were using her success to promote what team players they were. It sickened him, but she was happy. In her opinion, she didn’t care if they carted her around like a show pony as long as they didn’t suspect where she was getting her intel from.

He kept telling her that her skills were wasted on the FBI and that was true. She was brilliant. The way she interpreted events and the world was unlike anything he’s ever seen.

His world, which has mired in the dark for the better part of three decades has lightened somewhat. There were still many, many shadows, but that was good, he thought. You couldn’t have shadows unless you first had light to cast them.

Her. Lizzie made all the difference. And he almost lost her. He couldn’t go with her everywhere and most certainly not into a federal court room, which was where she had been before she was taken.

They had quite a drive ahead of them and he would need every second to get himself put back together after feeling as if he’d been gutted when he believed that he was too late to save her.

 

*****

 

They rode for what had have been nearly two hours. All she could think of was that she couldn’t believe that she was alright. She settled in close to Red during the car ride and just inhaled his scent to reassure herself that she was really fine. She was a little nervous because she didn’t know where they going. She didn’t have her cane and she was completely dependent on Red for her safety and well-being.

Not that that was a problem, because in truth, over the past weeks, he’d established himself as an entirely honorable man…at least where she was concerned.

She trusted him more than she did Ressler and they’d been partners for almost two years.

“Thank you, Red.” She wiggled her finger and toes, testing their strength. It seems the drugs had mostly worn off.

He squeezed her tight “You don’t need to thank me. I’ll always come for you.” His voice still had the ability to make her shiver and feel like she was wrapped in a warm blanket with hot chocolate simultaneously.

She felt the car slow and eventually stop. Red confirmed that it wasn’t just a temporary stop with “Were here.”

He came sound to her side and lifted her out with a grunt “Red, I can walk now, I think. Put me down. You’re going to break your back and I like it, it’s my favorite.”

He chuckled for the first time that evening “How would you know?”

“Because it’s yours” she whispered. She didn’t have to be able to see to know that it was beautiful.

He put her down on a bed. It was so soft and fluffy that she just wanted to sink down into its beckoning comfort and fall asleep for days. Unfortunately, she was in dire need of a bathroom and a shower. “Red, where’s the bathroom?”

“Oh, of course. I’ll take you.” He bent to lift her again, but she didn’t want him to go to the bathroom with him!

“No, Red. I’ve got this. All I need for you to tell me is where it is in relation to me like a clock. Is it at my ten o’clock? Two? Then tell me if there are any obstacles in my path and what side of the room the sink is on. Bathrooms are pretty uniform in design, I’m a big girl.”

He blew out a sigh. “I don’t see why you are so determined to shun my help. That’s why I’m here. To help. But if you’re dead set on this, the bathroom is at your one o’clock. The sink and toilet are on the right, the soap is on the right of the sink, and there’s a towel to dry your hands on the counter.”

She stood and waited a moment to be sure that she wasn’t going to tip over like a drunk and made her way to the bathroom with her right arm extended in front of her. She’d had one too many unpleasant meetings with walls and door jams over the years to not take care.

“Red?” He was behind her in an instant “Are you alright?” She turned and reached for his face, finding it almost instinctively. She cupped his cheek “I’m going to take a shower. I don’t want you to freak out when I don’t come out right away. I have to get the stench of death off of me. I can’t stand it.”

He enveloped her in a tight hug “Alright sweetheart, I’ll find something for you to change into and have it waiting for you when you get out.”

“Thank you. You’re the best.”

 

*****

 

As the door clicked shut behind her, he grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt from his closet and settled into a reading chair positioned across the room from the bathroom.

He ran his hands over the back of his head to his face and sighed. He shouldn’t stay, but he couldn’t bring himself to leave. What if she fell?

Having to listen to her while she took a shower was the sweetest torture he’d ever endured.

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was rough and probably still need ironing, but I need it to fit this way for the following chapters. Let me know what you think!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red is having more trouble than Liz dealing with what happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long to update!

He listened to her shower, heard her stumble once and drop one of the bottles another time. It was all he could do to not burst into the bathroom and help her.

She would most likely castrate him if he tried. She was so damn independent and hated the thought of being pitied or labeled as deficient in some way.

The problem was all on him. He had trouble processing all of the protective feelings she brought forth in himself. Feelings he thought to be long dead. He knew that she was capable of causing great bodily harm, had watched her at the gym once. For peace of mind of course.

He had to know that she could take care of herself when he’d hired her tail. He couldn’t be with her all of the time, she worked at the FBI. He’d thought about turning himself in, offering himself up and brokering a deal, but Uncle Sam was notoriously shady. So shady that they made the Concierge of Crime look like a nun volunteering at a soup kitchen. Their ledger was full of bad debt and if he took the calculated risk to maneuver himself to work with Lizzy, they could just stick him in a hole and torture him for the rest of his days. And that was not on his agenda.

He was firmly entrenched in his thoughts when Lizzie came out of the bathroom, completely naked except for the one lone hand towel that he’s left on the counter.

He would have spoken, but he was certain that he’d swallowed his tongue.

She beat him to it. She looked right at him as she said “I couldn’t find a towel and there’s nothing really to cover up with. I dried off alright with it, but my hair is still sopping wet.”

He didn’t answer. He couldn’t. He coughed, his voice impossibly low as if he’d swallowed broken glass “Lizzie…you’re naked.”

He got up to find her a towel, but not before noticing that when he spoke, her nipples puckered in reaction.

“Oh, shit. Well, I knew that, but I just forgot…I just forget that body image and shame are a thing, you know? A non-sighted person doesn’t have those fears. I’m sorry for flashing you like a crazy person, I guess.” With a self-depreciating laugh.

She still made no move to cover herself. He knew she was in shape. He knew she was beautiful. He did not know the planes and curves of her muscles. The gentle slope and roundness of her breasts. The slight dip and hollow of her pelvis and hips. Those images would be forever branded upon his memory. If he died today, he would die a man with the knowledge that he’d gazed upon true beauty.

“Red. I’m no side show pony. Towel?” He snapped back to reality, embarrassed to be caught ogling her naked body. He grabbed a large, fluffy bath towel and wrapped it around her from behind.

“Of, course, Lizzie. I was just…yeah. You caught me. I was staring. I honestly could not look away. In fact, if someone were to hold a gun to my head, I would make sure they weren’t blocking my view as they pulled the trigger.

She laughed, a full belly laugh as she secured the towel not around her body, but her head.

Was she trying to kill him?

“Clothes. I have clothes.” She chuckled again and he realized how utterly ridiculous he sounded.

“Oookay? Are you referring to your clothes, or clothes for me? If it’s the first, then I am happy that you are clothed because it would be awkward should we both be standing around like idiots naked. If it’s the second, I am doubly glad, because I am clearly making you uncomfortable and should cover up. I know you don’t understand, but look at it like heights. The fear of heights is a completely sighted concept. I have no idea how to be afraid of heights. And I am sitting here talking like a fool, getting increasingly uncomfortable so please help me out.”

He shoved the pants and shirt in her arms and tried to focus on what she’d even said so that he could formulate an acceptable answer “You’re not afraid of heights?”

She dressed efficiently, feeling for he tags before stuffing her limbs into the fabric. “How would I even know to be afraid? I can be standing on the edge of a cliff and would have no idea which step would lead to my death.”

Her words were not helping. At all. In fact, now instead of being stupefied over her body, he was close to hyperventilating at the thought, the mere prospect, that she literally led a life that was one step away from death. She could fall in the field, she could go down a flight of stairs, or despite her proficiency navigating could walk in front of a car.

He knew she meant to reassure him, but all she did was reinforce his belief that he did the absolute right thing by hiring Ezra, one of the most deadly sniper assassins in the business, to shadow Lizzie during the day. Lizzie would never be taken again.

Instead of continuing the line of talk on a subject that would worried him ceaselessly, he instead asked “Are you hungry? Let’s get you a something to eat and a tall glass of water. You’ll need to rehydrate from…tonight.”

She walked towards Red with her arm outstretched. He caught her hand immediately. She had not known him long, but she knew that he truly was there for her.

 

*****

 

Red made spaghetti for her. It tasted amazing. She kept wiping her mouth off, she knew she had to be making a complete mess, but she couldn’t bring herself to care, not one bit. She had been so thirsty, so hungry that she sat on the counter next to Red as he cooked, hoping that the sounds of her growling stomach would somehow make him cook faster.

While they waited on the pasta and the sauce to cook, Red cleaned and chopped up strawberries for her. Instead of giving her a bowl to eat on her own, he fed them to her himself as he cut.

“Here, have a strawberry, open up.” He plopped the first one in her mouth, it was just the perfect size and the taste was heavenly. Although she’s sure that had he fed her acorns, she would have ate every dingle bite as well.

At the next bite “Here.” She almost accidentally bit him. “Ah ah ah, you should never bite the hand that feeds you.” He chuckled at her eager display of hunger.

She just smirked and waited for the next bite with her mouth slightly ajar. When he touched the strawberry to her lips, she wrapped her tongue around his finger and nipped at him again.

Red cleared his throat “New rule. You should always bite the hand that feeds you, but only if it’s exactly like that.”

They laughed and he continued to feed her until their meal was finished. She didn’t use her tongue again, but alternated nipping at his fingers and outright biting him as payback for his teasing. Their playful banter went along way to helping them cope with the earlier events.

After they finished eating, he led her into the library. “I smell paper. Books. Are you going to read me a bedtime story, Red? You’re going to totally lose all your street cred if you continue to be this nice.”

He laughed “Well, I suppose I could read you a story before I tuck you in tonight, but I also have a selection of books, some classics, but some contemporary authors as well for you. They’re in braille, so you won’t be dependent on me for entertainment.”

He tried to make it sound like his actions were totally self-serving, but in reality, they were totally selfless and he was uncomfortable with that.

He led her to the shelves and placed her hand upon the bindings where she could read what books were there.

She was trying so hard not to cry “This is amazing, Red, but you didn’t have to do this for me.”

“I know that. I never do anything that I don’t want to.” To her, that was more revealing than any other words he could have said. He didn’t have to, but wanted to make her comfortable. To provide her with the tools to remain independent.

He knew how important it was to her to not depend on anyone. This bad ass, international criminal was the sweetest man that she’d ever met. And she had no idea how to reconcile that with her prior knowledge of him.

“I know you bought these for me, but I don’t know if I could muster the required concentration for reading. If you don’t mind, I’d just like to be by you, you know. You don’t need to read out loud or anything. Your company is enough.”

As always, he was thankful that she couldn’t see him as he gruffly replied “I would love your company. I’m more than happy to read to you if you want.”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lizzie kills a Blacklister, Red freaks out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is set a week or two after the last chapter. Thank you for the Reviews and Kudos. They seriously mean the world to me! I am so happy that I can contribute to this ship!

“Why would you go out into the field when you know that Fredrick Barnes is a man that shows no compunction with killing entire groups of people to suit his purpose? You knew it was dangerous, because I told you and because you interviewed the medical examiner who told you exactly what happens when a person's been infected. Yet you still went. I won’t even go into how irresponsible your partner is. I am this close Lizzie, this close to turning myself in just so I don’t have to put up with the FBI’s incompetence.”

He was gesturing wildly, but it was lost on her. He was doing it more for his comfort anyways. She looked pissed. She probably tuned him out halfway, but she had no idea the danger that she was in.

“I took care of it.” He sighed in an attempt to calm himself. “You shouldn’t have had to.”

Ezra called him and reported the incident as soon as it happened. During Barnes’ attempt to flee, he ran into Lizzie and took her to the ground. Ressler yelled and told her that it was their suspect.

She was in too close of quarters with him while they grappled on the ground for Ezra to have a clear shot. Thankfully, Lizzie had the training that she did. Even though it ended with Fredrick Barnes taking a dirt nap. Lizzie broke his miserable neck, which saved Red from having to do it.

But that wasn’t the point. He was looking at Lizzie and was so relieved yet enraged, that he really had no idea how to react.

“I didn’t mean to break his neck-“

Red sighed “Lizzie, all you did was save that man hours of torture and dismemberment.”

“I have better training than that though. I fully expect to be suspended for it. I was just disoriented and he stuck me and then I was afraid and it just happened. I am probably going to lose my job.”

“Of course you were disoriented. A man came at you from nowhere and tackled you to the ground…What do you mean he stuck you?!” Red’s voice started out compassionate but ended in an enraged whisper. “Have you been to the doctor yet?”

“They drew blood, but told me I wouldn’t know the results until tomorrow or the next day.”

Red was already on the move, grabbing her by the arm and practically dragging her out of her apartment “Come on, we’re going to a doctor and we are getting results today. Right now.”

She wasn’t really mad, because she wanted the results just as much as he did and also because selfishly, she loved that he cared so much for her. It meant that she wasn’t in this alone.

“Red, honey, wait. I am not dead yet, and according to the Medical Examiner, the previous infected victims died within minutes, it has already been over six hours. Red, stop! I don’t even have shoes on!”

Heedless to her words, oblivious to slip in calling him ‘honey’, he scooped her up in a fireman’s hold and rushed out of her apartment.

 

*****

 

Red paced back and forth in a clinic where they were met by someone named Mr. Kaplan. Which was confusing at first because Mr. Kaplan was a small statured woman that smelled like lilacs. But to each his, or her, own.

Mr. Kaplan was gruff, but extremely nice to her. She spoke as she took Liz’s blood, explained everything that she was doing and why. It made Liz wonder if she had prior experience working with the blind.

Although, she wouldn’t put it past Red to have already explained how she preferred to be kept in the loop when things happen. He was thoughtful like that.

“How much longer will it be?” Red’s growl was impatience and worry rolled into one.

“Red, you need to calm down.” She coughed then and he was in front of her in an instant. He grabbed her by the shoulders “Lizzie, are you feeling sick?!” He was panicking.

“Red, geez, no I just sucked in too much air when I was speaking and my throat was dry.” She turned her head towards Mr. Kaplan and said “I think you need to give him a sedative until this is all over.”

She looked back at Red “What is your deal? Why are you even freaking out? I’m an FBI agent. You are a criminal. I have no value to you other than helping you take out your competition. Something that any other FBI agent would give their left nut for-”

He put his hand over her mouth. “You don’t get to speak unless you stop with your nonsense.”

She heard the click of heals on the floor as Mr. Kaplan moved out of the room. Either it was time for the results of she was just as tired of Red’s bullshit as Liz was. She nipped at his hand, hoping to tease him out of his funk. He just sighed and rested his forehead against hers “Lizzy, you very well know that I care. I’d like to think that we are…friends. I sent you to that man. He was part of my list. If he did something to you…infected you with something, I will never forgive myself.”

He’d no sooner finished speaking, when the telltale clip clap of Mr. Kaplan’s heels sounded on the floor. Something was different though. Her clothing rustled more and her voice was slightly muffled when she said “Raymond, you need to get out of here. There are anomalies in her blood. We need to run more tests.

She shoved him away from her as hard as she could “Oh, no. Red, go. Get out of here now!” He wouldn’t budge though. He tried to hug her, and she was scrambling to get away from him so he wouldn’t touch her and get infected but he wouldn’t let her go. ‘”Let go of me! I’m infected!” She was fast becoming hysterical.

“Shhh, Lizzie. You’re going to be fine. Whatever he infected you with, we will deal with and find a cure. I swear to you I will find a cure. Stop trying to get away from me. I’m staying. I’m not going to leave you. I’ve touched you, you just exhaled on me, in my face even. If it’s airborne, I’ve already got it. No use not being in good company, right Mr. Kaplan?”

 

******

 

Lizzie and Red were to be quarantined for forty-eight hours while test after test was run. Red himself drew their blood several times and sent it out to Mr. Kaplan for lab work. They still had no idea what Lizzie had been infected with. He was worried and anxious. He needed to get out of here and help Mr. Kaplan go through all of Fredrick Barnes’ research notes.

He’d sent Dembe to steal them from under the FBI’s nose. It was much easier than it should have been and only made his point that the FBI was full of morons so much more apparent.

During that time, they had absolutely nothing to do but talk. At one point, after about 10 hours, Liz suggested playing Hot Hands. “What the hell is hot hands? It sounds like a sex game, and I am so bored that I’m absolutely ok with that.”

She smacked his arm playfully “Ass. No. It’s a game from when I was in school and I was always really good at it even though it usually requires sight.”

She sat back on the hospital bed and patted the space in front of her “Sit here and face me. I’ll put my hands out, palms up and you will lay your palms over mine. No touching, just hovering over them. Then, you’ll have to guess when I am about to smack your hands and move yours out of the way or be hit. When I finally smack your hands, we’ll switch and I’ll dodge you. Got it?”

“I’m no simpleton, Lizzie. I would like to go on the record and say I’d be much happier if this was a sex game.” SMACK, Liz giggled “I gotcha. Your turn.”

She smacked him hard so he growled. “Oh, watch out now Lizzie. I am not going to hold back just because you’re a girl.”

She waited serenely, eyes closed, head tipped back to expose the lithe column of her throat. He swallowed. She was so beautiful.

He really was competitive, but she was the perfect distraction. Everything that he wanted, wrapped up in one absolutely unattainable package.

He stared at her hands, so small, but those hands killed a man and if he were completely honest with himself, he was incredibly turned on by that fact.

He shook his head, pushed the thoughts away that he had no business thinking. “You ready Lizzy?”

His voice was low, almost a growl. She maintained her pose, but nodded her head slightly. Her nostrils flared and she breathed in deep.

He waited a moment more to keep her guessing, but it was futile. Every time he tried to get her hands, she moved hers away.

“Can I tell you something, Red?” Her eyes were still closed, but there was a smile on her face.

“Anything, you know that.”

“I’m cheating.”

He laughed “How exactly are you cheating? You can’t see when I am about to move. Even if I were giving myself away somehow you would know. Maybe you just know me?”

“Exactly! I know you and I don’t have to be able to see you. I can hear you. You are reluctant to hit me, even in a game because I am blind. It’s a natural reaction that people, normal people that aren’t sociopaths have. Your breath hitches before you move.”

“Well, I guess you do know me.”

What he wanted to say was that his reluctance had nothing to do with him being blind and everything to do with the fact that he loved her.

 

**TBC…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz has some side effects from being infected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would have updated sooner, but am currently dealing with a death in the family, my children starting at an accelerated school, and every other RL problem that doesn't disappear when life is crap,lol. So sorry I'm behind! I actually found a spare moment to post.   
> I would like to thank you so much for your response to this! Remember, If you're waiting an update, I have other fics that are complete

Liz’s white blood cell count was elevated but the numbers weren’t alarmingly high. The physician explained that white blood cell count is elevated when a body is attempting to fight off an infection.

She had developed a headache over the hours of waiting with Red. She had no history of migraines, so they assumed that they were manifested by whatever she was injected with. Red tried to use his ample resources to get ahold of the actual syringe that Barnes used, but one hadn’t been logged into the FBI’s evidence database.

As a precaution they treated the headache with painkillers and pumped her full of antibiotics to help her body fight whatever was going on with her physiologically.

She hated feeling like this. Not knowing what was to come. She didn’t know what she would have done without Red’s support. Until her head started to ache, his crazy and entertaining stories were the reason she wasn’t climbing the walls to escape.

Red took a seat next to the hospital bed where Liz laid with a pillow over her face. He was confused, but she said it made her feel better.

With one day left of quarantine, Red was showing no symptoms and would get to leave the next day. His blood was showing no marked differences, which relived Liz so much she started to cry. Her tears made Red uncomfortable, but it wasn’t her fault that he was all ‘Alpha male have to fix all the problems for the helpless female’.

He was so adorable. She wasn’t stupid, she’d read his file so many times she’d lost count. He was a manipulative international criminal whose only allegiance was to himself.

It was difficult sometimes, to reconcile what she knew and had once studied at Quantico, versus what she’d experienced first-hand. Which Raymond Reddington was real? Or was he a mixture of both?

Those questions had her thinking too much and her brain felt like it was on fire. Her migraine had centered right behind her eyes and the painkillers were doing nothing to help.

She moaned “Please just let me die.” Which in hindsight, if she’d been thinking clearly was the absolute wrong thing to say.

Her statement was met with absolute silence. She wished she could see his face, but then again, she could tell from his lack of reply he was most likely angry with her. “Geez, Red, it’s just an expression. Lighten up. And while you’re removing that stick from your behind, hook me up with something good for the pain. You’re a damn criminal, why the hell don’t you have access to something stronger than Tylenol?”

She let her head fall back to the bed with a ‘thud’. When she still didn’t get a reply, she put her head back up, only to have Red hold her forehead down with his hand. “You don’t need to injure your head even more, I’ll call and get you something. You should have just said something to me instead of praying for death.”

She heard him get up and call Mr. Kaplan on the phone and tell her to bring something stronger and ask for an update on the blood work. He said ‘alright’ and ‘yes’ a few times and then hung up the phone.

“I’ll get you taken care of, Lizzie”

She sat up and hugged the pillow in front of her in anticipation of taking the medication. Red walked over to her, but when he got close to her she flinched. He froze “What’s the matter? Do you feel sick? Is something else wrong?”

Her face was scrunched up in pain “No, no. I’m sorry. I’m fine, I don’t even know why I did that. It’s got to be the stress.”

What she didn’t tell him was that she flinched because when he walked toward her she saw a shadow and freaked out. She needs to get out of there and see her eye doctor. She hadn’t seen anything since the day she was blinded. No light, no shadows, just perpetual darkness. If she told him the truth he would probably keep her here even longer. If anything came of it, she’d let him know.

Red went to the door and retrieved the shot from Mr. Kaplan. All Liz heard was “Tell me you’re joking”. When nothing followed, not even Red with her meds, she yelled “If you are keeping drugs from me I’m going to kick your ass.”

He was slow to return to her and when he spoke, his voice was hoarse “Lizzie, I have a shot for you, but you’re not going to like where it needs to go.”

 

******

 

He could think of no greater torture on this planet than this. Lizzie was bent over the bed in front of him with her right hip and ass exposed in front of him. His brain didn’t seem to compute that this was for clinical purposes only and decided that a raging erection would make all of that so much easier to deal with. He made sure that his arousal didn’t brush up against her and administered the shot as soon as possible.

He put a band-aid on the injection site in case she bled a little and pulled up her pants for her since she made no effort to move from her position over the bed. “Lizzie, we’re done. Go ahead and get back up on the bed.”

“Red, did you just give me morphine?” He walked across the room to deposit the needle in the Sharps container “Yes, why?”

She sighed “I need you to promise me that you won’t listen to a single thing I say.” Already, her words were slurring and he was dying of curiosity. “You’re not allergic, are you?”

She giggled “Nope. I just have a low…tolerance for the stuff.”

He smiled and thought that this day just got a whole lot better “Do you need help up?”

“Up where?”

“Sitting up.”

“Umm…I thought I already was.” More giggles. His Lizzie was higher than a kite. He turned her around and went to lift her into a sitting position but she stopped him by throwing her arms around his neck and nuzzling her cheek against his. She inhaled deeply and sighed in pleasure “You smell nice.”

He froze, his mind a blank canvass. For just saying that he smelled nice, there was an outpouring of emotion in her voice. “Why thank you sweetheart. How’s the headache?”

“What headache?”

“I guess I have my answer then, huh?”

“Red, will you hold me? I need to feel your arms around me.” His heart thudded so loudly in his chest, he thought for sure she would be able to hear him, to feel it, but if she did, she didn’t comment on it.

He crawled onto the bed with her and tried to take up as little space and keep as far away from her as possible. She wanted no part of that and crawled right on top of him, maneuvering his body closer to the middle of the bed as she went. She straddled his waist, laid her head upon his chest and it was all he could do to stay calm. He tried to think of horrendous things he’d seen over the years, the most unattractive people.

Nothing was helping, so he decided to go for humor and hoped she wouldn’t feel his arousal pressed against her. “Of course. Don’t go getting hands-y, now. A girl has her reputation to think of.” he said in a higher tone of voice than normal.

That sent her into giggles that quickly let to a boisterous laughter. As sudden as it started, her laughter died off suddenly and she peered up at him seriously. “You’re so funny….too funny. You make it entirely too easy to-“

Her words stopped as her head fell against him.

He had to get her to finish that sentence “Lizzie. I make it too easy to what? Lizzie?” Silence. He pulled her body away from his, but she was sound asleep, her mouth slightly open adorably.

He knew she hadn’t rested well since their quarantine, but he was so very tempted to shake her awake so she could finish what she was saying, but he didn’t have the heart to disturb her, even if it cost him his sanity.

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think, please!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz wakes up alone. Red has a surprise for Liz.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being so wonderful and sticking with this! You guys are the best.
> 
> Disclaimed, as always!

Liz came slowly awake and realized that she was alone. She was relieved that her headache was gone. Unfortunately, she had no idea where she was and where Red went to. “Red?”

When she received no response, she got up. She slowly walked to where she thought the door was, but there was nothing but wall. And the chair she hit her shin on. _Great._ She felt along the wall and on finally found the door. It wasn’t locked, so she just calmly walked out of the room like she hadn’t a care in the world. The key was confidence. Walk like you owned the place and people might believe it.

Since Red was no longer there, the quarantine had probably been lifted. If not? Well they shouldn’t have left her alone.

She walked down a long hallway, trying doors along the way, but they were all locked. She couldn’t hear any voices, but was unsure if she should yell for Red, or be silent. She was disoriented and no longer felt safe, so she decided that silence was her best option.

“Mam?” She froze. There was a man behind her. She slowly turned “Where’s the man I was with earlier?” She had no idea if they were in a legitimate hospital or not and there was no way she was selling Red out on accident by asking for him by name.

“I don’t know who you were with earlier, I just saw you on the video feed and my orders are to make sure the hallway stays clear and quiet. You need to come with me, ‘mam.”

“Stop calling me mam like I’m some middle aged spinster and then you can kindly tell me where the exit is before you take yourself back from where you came. I’d hate to have to tell your employer how unaccommodating you were.”

“Are you serious? It’s right in front of you. Are you blind?” The little shit was on her last nerve. If he put one hand on her, Red was going to be short one man.

“What I am, sir, is out of patience. Good day.” She found the door quickly enough and opened it into the warm sunshine of the day, but not before she heard the asshole call for back-up.

He lunged and grabbed her arm so she used his forward momentum against him and slammed her knee into his face. She heard a satisfying crunch and howl to confirm that she’d given him a discount nose job.

He tried to grab her again “Didn’t you learn your lesson the first time?” She punched him in the throat and kneed him in the groin. He was down and she listened, but couldn’t hear him get back up, just his moans from the floor.

Suddenly, arms like steel bands wrapped around her from behind. _Red._ She relaxed immediately. His arms remained tight “How am I supposed to protect you when you unman my security?”

She was so relieved that he was here, a reassuring presence that her anger dissipated as quickly as it came. “Why wasn’t your security briefed that I was- A. Blind and B. Not to be touched?”

His answering growl rumbled through her entire body “He touched you?”

She snorted. Leave it to him to focus on the least important part of this entire debacle “Never mind that; he mocked me and had no idea to reassure me that something awful hadn’t happened, but he touched me and that’s what you believe the real problem is here?”

His grip loosened, but he still hugged her to him from behind “I’m sorry. I was anxious to get to reading Barnes’ notes and thought you would be asleep for much longer. I knew you needed the rest and so I just let you sleep instead of waking you when our time was up.”

“What did you find?” her voice went almost flat in trepidation of the news she was sure she was about to receive. “Nothing yet, his research centers mostly around stem cell and their regenerative properties.”

She stiffened. She wished like hell she could read the notes he had. She needed to do some research of her own. She needed to get out of here, but was one thousand percent sure Red wasn’t going to go along with letting her leave on her own. She had to try.

“Red, I’ve been off the grid for two days, I’m going to need to go in to work.” He sighed “I realize that. I don’t want to make things harder for you at work, but I don’t want to let you out of my sight.” He gave her one last squeeze and let her go.

He put his arm under her hand to lead her to the briefing room. “Dembe and Mr. Kaplan are going to pour over these research notes while I take you him to change and clean up.”

She nodded and said “Thank you for working so hard and thank you Mr. Kaplan for taking such good care of me.”

Mr. Kaplan’s voice reverberated throughout the room with an air of finality “No need to thank me dear, you’re one of us now.”

 

******

 

Red had Liz home in no time and the relief that she felt was a crushing weight lifted off her chest that she hadn’t even known was there. Being home finally, where she knew exactly where everything was, brought tears to her eyes.

She craved consistency and working with Red had upended everything in her life and brought her chaos at every turn. She loved every minute of said chaos, but she needed to decompress every once in a while and not have to rely on someone else for guidance.

She moved for her spare guide cane and just left Red on his own in her living room. Her only explanation was a yelled “Shower” before leaving a trail of clothing through the house. She peeked out of her bedroom and unknowingly gave him a glimpse of heaven “Don’t feel like you need to pick up my stuff, the cleaning lady will get it.”

As soon as he heard her enter the shower, he nosed in her room to continue the conversation “How did I not know you had a cleaning lady?! He yelled through the door. The sounds of her washing and the images he had of soap sluicing down her perfect body were killing him.

“Why do you need to know? How the hell else am I going to clean up my stuff? I’d be combing the floors for days looking for things I’ve dropped.”

“Makes sense. You need to hurry up though, you have a surprise coming anytime!”

What he wasn’t expecting was Lizzie to come barreling out of the bathroom naked once again, but this time with a huge grin on her face. “You got me a surprise? I love surprises!”

He turned away from her to give her a modicum of privacy.

“If I would have known you’d react like this, I’d have pushed for him to come sooner.”

When she spoke, she startled him because she came up behind him so silently behind him. “Him? Did you order me a stripper, Red?” She was teasing him, and his pretend scowl would be lost on her so he just said “Hardly”

He glanced at her to see if she’d put something on, but nope, still stark naked. “For crying out loud Lizzie, put some damn clothes on!”

Her face fell. “I’m so sorry. I was just excited and I didn’t even think. I just…I’m sorry.” Her bottom lip was trembling. He absolutely did not mean to upset her “No, sweetheart, I love your enthusiasm. But, well…I may be an old man, but I am still just a man.”

She was biting on her lower lip, hesitant to even speak, it seemed. “I didn’t mean to shout, really. You are so beautiful and sweet it makes my back teeth ache just thinking about you.”

Still biting her lip, she stepped up closer to him. His breath caught. He didn’t even move for fear of upsetting her again. “You think I’m beautiful?”

“Of course you are.” He almost retorted that she knew how beautiful she was, but if she were blinded as a teenager, then she truly had no idea of the beautiful woman that she had become.

“You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”

“You make me wish I were different. Better.”

He snorted. “You are too good for me as it is. Any better and you’re head will get awfully tired from carting around a halo.”

She flat out laughed a full belly laugh that drew his eyes away from her face “Red, I wish I weren’t a cop. I wish I weren’t blind. But then I would be taking away everything that made me special to you.” She was a breath away from him and he thought she was going to kiss him. “I am nothing but a liability in your world” she stated bitterly.

She walked away to her closet and donned a pair of workout pants and a sports tank.

He wanted to tell her so many things. Tell her that he had more money than god and could make his world her world with a snap of his fingers. Neither one of them were ready for that, but they would be soon.

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz gets her surprise and sees new possibilities in her future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU for the wonderful response to this fic! You guys are the best!  
> Disclaimed, as usual. I own nothing.

“What the hell is that?!” Liz cried as a cold nose nuzzled in against her cheek. She was upset, but couldn’t resist letting out a giggle when he touched her. This was only going to break her heart when she had to say no.

“Lizzie, it’s a dog. Your dog to be exact. His name is Red. Ironically, I had no part in naming him. I picked him because he looked scary as hell. When I learned his name, I wouldn’t hear of choosing another. His brother Blue and sister Pinkie were ready as well, but he looked like he could kill a man with little provocation. In other words, he was perfect for you.”

She cuddled Red close and hugged him around his neck “Red, I can’t keep him. I may be super independent, but caring for a dog would be difficult and with my weird hours, and time spent away from home, there’s no way I can care for him.”

Red’s voice was tender, soft when he replied “Well that’s just it, sweetheart. He’s here to care for you, protect you. Not the other way around. He’s been fully trained and certified as a seeing-eye dog. He will take you wherever you need to go safely. Red here is special and is also a fully trained K-9 police dog who can catch criminals, search and rescue, and sniff out drugs and bombs. So he won’t let you get into any danger.”

Tears were running down her face. “Red, this had to cost so much money. I don’t know what to say. This is the kindest, most generous gift I’ve ever received.”

He didn’t reply “Red.” His hoarse “Yes?” coincided with Red the dog’s whine. Lizzie laughed. “If you are going to be a permanent fixture around here, then I’m going to need to call you something other than Red. It confuses my baby.”

And then she cuddled and spoke baby talk, telling Red (the dog) how much she adored him and how they would sleep together and take walks together and how much she loved him already. In hindsight, buying the dog named Red was the stupidest idea he’d ever had. Listening to her say ‘love’ and “Red’ in the same sentence made his heart skip a beat…or three.

“I guess you’ll just have to call me Ray or Raymond.” He tried to keep the smugness out of his tone, but the way she narrowed her eyes told him that he was unsuccessful.

She leaned over to him, grabbed his face by the cheeks and smacked a kiss right on his lips, leaving him dumbfounded. “You’re too arrogant. Maybe I’ll just call you sugar buns and then you’ll lose your street cred. You’ll never be able to make another deal without your other criminal friends making fun of you…sugar buns.”

He chuckled “How do you know how sweet my buns are? Hmm?”

Still holding on to his head, she ran her hands provocatively over his face, causing him to groan softly. “You forget that I’ve slept next to you. I’ve ran my hands over every part of your body. I wanted to ‘see’ you. Trust me sugar buns, there isn’t a more appropriate nickname for you.”

This was definitely not the time. “I’m glad you like him. You’ll have classes here for two weeks where a trainer will help you two become better acquainted, but there is a book on your dining room table in braille that gives you the basics.”

Before he thought better of it, he kissed her on the cheek and set her away from him. It left her a little dismayed and off kilter until Red came and nuzzled her hand, waiting for her to tell him what to do.

She was still slightly in awe of his extreme generosity but all she could think to say was “Thank you Raymond.”

In that moment, it was as if all the walls between them came tumbling down, never to return to the way they were before. Criminal and FBI agent were no more, all that was left was a man and a woman and their combined raw emotions.

His voice was so low that she could barely hear it “You’re welcome, Lizzie.” He said it with such feeling that it sounded more like ‘I love you’, but until she could actually figure out her own future, it would be unfair to try and persuade him into entangling his with it.

 

*****

 

Ray stayed the night at her insistence. If she were completely honest, she would tell him that she didn’t want to be alone. His quick acquiescence told her that he was just as hesitant to leave her company.

He ordered their food over the phone, but by the sound of the food, she didn’t think that restaurants that upscale even delivered. One of his associates must be delivering it.

She snuck off to her bedroom to call her physician. She had his cell phone number because they’d been on a couple of dates, but there had been no chemistry there and remained friends. Her vision was changing and she had to know why. She could make out shapes and thought she may have seen a color or two. Nothing to write home about by any means, but infinitely important to her. She was breathless with the implications of that miniscule improvement.

 

“Nick. Hey, it’s Liz. Can you fit me in tomorrow? I need some tests run.”

“Hi Liz! I’d ask why you are whispering, but you’re probably taking care of a criminal right now or something. Of, course I can. You can swing by first thing if that’s alright.”

“Yeah, something like that. I’ll see you in the morning. Bye.”

“Bye-“

She hung up before he finished and walked back to the kitchen. “Lizzie, I was wondering where you disappeared to. Dinner will be here momentarily.”

She heard him approach and put her hand out for the arm that she knew would be waiting. “Great. I’m starving.”

Once in the living room she said “Are you here permanently? I mean, I know you travel a lot, but is D.C. your base of operations?” When she was met with silence, she said “I didn’t mean in an official capacity. I’m wondering for me…I mean I was wondering how long you would require my services to profile and assist with your list.”

She blushed at her blunder at making it too personal. She was not very good at subtle, that’s for sure.

“This incident has caused me to rethink things. I still have an objective, mind you, but I have no wish to put you in further danger. I don’t exactly know what that means quite yet. We will give old Red here a trial run. Hopefully he will keep you safer than that useless partner of yours. Why do you ask?”

The jingle of Red’s collar meant that Ray was petting or most likely scratching his back if the contented whines of a dog in bliss meant anything.

“I was thinking that having Red by my side means that the world just got a whole lot larger. I am no longer confined to the places I know and would like to travel.”

She wished she knew what he was thinking. “You would like to travel?”

“Of course. Being blind doesn’t mean that I can’t experience the world. I want to hear the crashing of waves against a cliff, the pulsating heartbeat of the rainforest, the serenity and silence of a monastery, but most of all I want to know what it’s like to live as though I’m not afraid.”

Her impassioned speech made him want all of those things and more for her. “Whatever you want to do, Lizzie. I’ll never stop you from being happy.”

She threw her arms around him “Thank you! I can’t wait to go! I am sure it will be an adjustment for Red and I, but I was reading about the hostels all across Europe and Asia and I know exactly where I want to go. Thank you!”

He froze “Hostels?” She moved back so she could run her hands over his face. He was frowning deeply, the deep ridges of his brows making a ‘V’ appear in between them.

“Of course silly, I don’t actually have a ton of money to travel. We can’t all be international criminals. Those pamphlets were all taken on career day and I missed my opportunity.”

He couldn’t help but hug her tightly “There will be no hostels, Lizzie. You have made quite a name for yourself and there is no way that would be safe, with Red’s presence or not. I don’t want to presume that you would want company, but we could go together. I have been everywhere. Let me show you the world. I will take you to places where the sounds, smells, and textures are more than your wildest dreams.”

She laughed and cried her joy was so great. She could think of no other person she’d rather experience the world with.

“Yes. Absolutely, yes!”

 

**Tbc….**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz makes a big decision and Red receives big news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the amazing response. Your feedback is so much appreciated and I can't tell you how much it means to me.   
> Disclaimed, as always.

The next morning, Liz rushed around to get ready and nearly tripped over Red in her haste. “Oh, buddy, mommy’s so sorry, we’ll get you fed and out in just a minute.

There was now a special tub that contained food on her counter that her housekeeper would keep stocked. All of Red’s supplies were marked in braille and put well within reach for her. “Ray, I’m going to work now! I’ll see you after!”

He was still in the shower, their easy domesticity should trouble her, but it felt like the most natural thing in the world. She had never cohabitated with anyone before and she was excited to try it. They hadn’t really talked about it, but they made plans for dinner and then Red had purchased some movies that were made for the sight impaired, with descriptions for her to listen to on headphones while they watched. She couldn’t wait to get home tonight.

 

*****

 

At Nick’s office, he stood in front of her and paced while she sat in front of him. “I don’t understand. You can’t tell me why I am seeing a miracle happen right in front of me because it’s classified?!” He was so upset with her that she wouldn’t give the reason for her marked improvement.

“I’m sorry. Just give me the note and I’m gone.” was all she could whisper.

She was in shock herself. He looked into the back of her eye and took scans when she first walked in and then because he wouldn’t believe the results again just a few moments ago. In just that hour, there was a visible improvement to both the cornea and the cone of her eyes. Even the way her eyes now dilated in response to light was new. They’d been unresponsive for so long.

She had lived her entire adult life in shadows. She had no idea how to adapt to being sighted. Already the blobs of light and shadow were taking blurry shapes.

Would Red still want her? She knew that he relished caring for someone after going so long having nothing and no one. How would he react to the news?

He handed her the paper he had printed up and she stuffed it into her purse. She mumbled her thanks and hugged Nick good-bye. She had so much to think about. She was so grateful to have Red with her. He sensed the inner turmoil emanating from her pores and stuck close. He bumped his nose into her palm for comfort whenever they were sitting stationary.

She walked outside took a breath of the air that though unchanged, seemed more fresh than when she arrived. Until a voice behind her said “I was wondering why you didn’t arrive at work on time. How my sources lost a girl and a dog, I still haven’t the faintest. I was worried. Do you want to know what happens when I’m worried? I almost laid siege to the Post Office where you work. People would have most certainly died. But then you were finally spotted, visiting an old boyfriend.”

His voice was low, arctic in the chill it contained. “Ray. I was just having a check-up. It was long past due. No need to go starting wars. I’ve been on my own since long before the Concierge of Crime walked into my life and I’m damn certain I’ll be just fine once I finally wise up and kick his ass out of it.”

 

If he wanted to fight, she’d give him one.

He must not have been expecting her to call him out like that because all he did was step close and wrap his arms around her. He kissed her forehead and breathed in. He seemed to calm instantly and the tension left his shoulders. He really must have been worried about her.

“You need to stop having me followed. I am a big girl. What if someone with the FBI notices and then traces it back to you. You could be endangering yourself and I won’t have it.” She emphasized her words by poking him in the chest. She didn’t care if they made a scene, but as soon as that thought flitted through her mind, she dismissed it. They couldn’t, absolutely couldn’t make a spectacle of themselves. Not when she was going to put in her two week notice with the bureau.

“Ray, I’m sorry. I am going to go into work, but it will only be for a little while. Do you want to meet for lunch or do you have some pillaging that needs to be done? Is that why you are cranky, sugar buns?”

She knew that her teasing would help to calm him the rest of the way down. His chuckle was confirmation of that. “No. No pillaging until tomorrow, at least. I would love to meet you for lunch, sweetheart.”

“Good. I’ll get a cab when I’m done and you can let me know where to meet you.” She had always avoided utilizing cab service for the very fact that they were very confusing for her. There were too many variables and things that could go wrong. Now that she had Red, she didn’t have to fear being set up and dropped off to be robbed, or have traffic lead to missing her destination by one stop, totally disorienting her. She has to be able to trust the driver and as an FBI agent, she doesn’t have that kind of faith in humanity.

“How about a compromise, I’ll pick you up at the coffee shop we met at. Red will enjoy the stroll. Then we can go together. How’s that sound?”

She kissed him on the cheek. “Sounds perfect, Ray. I have something important to tell you.”

 

*****

 

When they finally met, it was slightly after lunchtime, but that was fine by her. Missing the rush meant less people to trip over. When she felt Ray’s presence behind her, she couldn’t deny the flutters that it caused in her stomach, the heat she felt blossoming from within when she smelled his cologne. “Red, I hope we’re going someplace secluded. I’ve had a dreadful morning and I want you all to myself.”

It was really the first time she had outwardly expressed her desire so blatantly to him and she waited for him to respond.

She really had a terrible morning. Trying to break up with the government was a difficult process. She had dedicated the last eight years of her life to them and she negotiated a pretty sweet deal with them. She couldn’t wait to tell Red. She may have manipulated the system slightly, but it would enable her to be free.

“You are playing with fire, Lizzie.” He took her free hand and led her inside of a small restaurant right next to the coffee shop.

“You’d be worth the burns, Ray.” She whispered as he pulled out her chair for her and gave Red a little pat on the head.

He huffed a laugh “That’s funny, I feel the same way.”

 

 

Instead of sitting across the table from her, he sat next to her. He hoped that she would tell him what was so important. The suspense was killing him.

She took out her purse and pulled out a piece of paper and handed it to him “Read through it and let me know what you think.” She looked excited, so it couldn’t be that bad.

As he read, the blood drained from his face.

 

_Dear Sir or Madame,_

_It is my regret to inform you that due to the exposure of a debilitating and possibly life threatening element, Special Agent Elizabeth Keen is no longer medically fit for duty. She has suffered migraines that threaten her safety and well-being and is no longer medically cleared for working in her chosen profession. If you have any questions, you can confer with myself at the number listed below._

He didn’t read any further, his heart was breaking. He had caused this. There was no forgiving the horrendous impact he’s had on her life.

“Lizzie, I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

Her smile dimmed. He had no idea how she was so calm and collected about this. “Why are you sorry? I thought that you’d be happy.”

“I could never be happy about you not being well.”

Her face brightened “Crap, I gave you the wrong paper! I’m so sorry, you weren’t supposed to see how devious I am. I’m blind, I have an excuse. Here, try this one.”

She handed him another paper “You’re going to need to explain that devious comment sooner or later. What am I looking at, it looks like a graph of some sort. Do you even know what I’m looking at? Your name is at the top and the numbers…the numbers are…Are you serious? This is why you went to the doctor this morning?”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red is happy to hear her news, but his joy is dulled when he finds out that an old associate is in town. Lizzie gets a shock at work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that it has been forever and I am so sorry, but I hope that I am making up for it with a longer chapter than usual. Thank you for your patience….Now, I had decided that this was going to be the set up for the next big event, of course it can’t just be smooth sailing for them. I wanted to find a way to incorporate Anslo Garrick into this fic because they were both really powerful episodes and important for Lizzington in general. I fudged the timeline a jot and well, it was AU to begin with so please bear with me. 
> 
> Disclaimed, as always.

He couldn’t breathe. Now that he knew exactly what he was looking at, he was ecstatic. Beyond words really, but he could tell that she was expecting him to function enough to provide a response. He couldn’t.

He just stood up and lifted her into the tightest hug he could without possibly injuring her. He stepped away from able and swung her around. Her squeals of laughter were a beautiful thing. The woman he loved who had a debilitating disability would possibly get better and he could not possibly be happier for her.

Red, the dog, had no idea what to think and barked excitedly.

He set her down but still kept ahold of her “What can you see? When did you notice the difference? Why didn’t you tell me? I should really be mad at you for hiding such an enormous development from me, but I am too busy being overjoyed.”

“Let’s sit back down, we’re going to get kicked out of here and I’m starving. Italian food smells so good. Ok, to answer your questions I can’t really see anything. Where previously I was stuck in the black void of nothingness, now it is dark when it’s dark and white or grey when it’s light. I can sometimes see a movement which is more like a shadow and always scares the crap out of me because I am simply not used to it. In fact, I’m always scared now. I crave consistency and now nothing is the same. I noticed the difference when I was with you. I didn’t want to tell you because what if it’s nothing? What if I never get any better and you would have celebrated for nothing. I had to get proof that is was more than nothing.”

He still held her hand “Lizzie, this is much more than nothing. This is everything. But why did you quit the bureau? Don’t get me wrong, the further you are from danger, the happier I am, but I am curious as to why.”

She frowned a little and cocked her head to the side “Have you changed your mind about our travels around the world then?”

He didn’t want to sound too shocked “Of course not. Is that what you want? To travel the world forever? Because I’m behind that idea one hundred percent. Although, I had previously planned an itinerary specially designed to showcase the smells and sounds of the world… You know what? It’s good that you quit now that our trip will be much longer.”

He wanted everything to be perfect for her, but the longer he thought about her sight coming back, the more apprehensive he became. He was a total bastard. Selfishly, he was thinking of himself, the relationship that he felt growing between them. Like a puff of smoke it would be gone before his eyes.

She wouldn’t want to spend the rest of her life with an old man. Not just an old man, but a criminal. The very type of person she had worked against for her entire career. He had more money than god, for sure. But what else did he have to offer her? A life on the run, hunted by both sides of the law, that’s all that was in the cards if they tried for a future together.

The thought of her coming to her senses and realizing what a sham of a human being he was caused his throat to tighten and ache.

Her leaving him was inevitable, but not before he showed her the world.

 

*****

 

In the middle of their dinner, Red had received a phone call that left him quiet and contemplative. “Do you need to go Raymond?”

He sighed, it sounded heavy, troubled “No, no. I just received some questionable information that an old associate turned thorn in my side is in town. I am hoping that this is wrong. Even so, when we leave here, I’ll need to get you straight home.”

The rest of their dinner was tense, their conversation stilted by the reminder that Red had extracurricular activities that had nothing to do with her.

When he walked her up to the door of her apartment, she turned to him and kissed him quickly on the mouth, shocking him into a stunned silence “Please, whatever is going on, just be careful. I need to know that you’ll be alright.”

 

*****

 

She kissed him and all he could do was stand there and stare at her door as if it held the secrets of the universe.

She never failed to astound him. He had decided to forget about everything but the phone call he’d received, but once again, she knocked him on ass, figuratively speaking.

He couldn’t do what he really wanted to and push her door open and kiss her senseless.

Unfortunately, he had to go assist a gentleman with a long overdue dirt nap and there was nothing figurative about that. Anslo Garrick would regret ever coming close enough to be within an arm’s reach of Raymond Reddington.

 

******

 

Liz went to work the following day, not having heard a peep from Red since she shocked the hell out of him.

She touched her lips and couldn’t help but remember the feel of his firm, slightly open lips pressed against them. She wondered if he even knew a rumbling gasp escaped from him as she kissed him.

Just the memory of the sound was enough to send shivers racing down her spine. She had to stop daydreaming. Needed to think of something else. Work. She had to focus on work.

Good thing she was quitting, because her coworkers were driving her insane. All of the other agents treated her as if she was disabled for the first time since she started. She sighed. She knew that they would act this way. By proving medically unfit for duty, she had showcased a weakness that she had worked so hard to overcome.

 

Liz was sitting at her desk, alphabetizing her files, though god knows why. It’s not like they will be utilized ever again. All of her notes were being transcribed to normal written reports as opposed to braille. She should just shred them, but was advised against it.

There was a knock on her door, just three short raps that she immediately knew to be Ressler since that was something that most of the other agents had adapted as a way of letting her know who was there. “Keen. You’re up. We just landed the biggest take down in recent FBI history. We need you to question him and work up a profile. You’re the best we’ve got… And he asked specifically for you.”

She laughed “Be careful shoveling around all that bull crap, I didn’t wear boots today. Who is it?”

“Raymond Reddington. Would you believe that he walked right up to FBI headquarters and turned himself in to our custody? He was just transferred here specifically to speak to you.” Liz had stopped listening after the first two words. Raymond Reddington. Her heart dropped into her abdomen and she was certain that she was going to vomit. What had he done?

She scrambled to leave the office, but had to stop when Red whined behind her. She almost forgot him in her haste to see Raymond! “Sorry, baby, mommy didn’t mean to leave you.”

As they walked, she tried to get her head in the game. No tells and no outward acknowledgement of Raymond would be possible. She had to sit with him and pretend like she hadn’t memorized the planes of his face, the way his left hand was slightly larger than his right hand, the pitch of his voice when he was trying not to let her know just how much he cared for her. She had to dissect him…like a criminal, when she knew there was so much more to him. She had to remain objective and not make note of his laugh, the smile in his voice. If she didn’t succeed, she’d be in holding right along beside him.

Once they reached the holding area, the agents there were buzzing in excitement. This was the biggest fish they’ve even been in the same county as, let alone the same building, the same room. Even Ressler, a seasoned agent with years of experience under his belt was nearly vibrating with tension.

She walked into the observation deck and decided that being direct would be her best bet “I don’t know why I’m here, it’s not like I can actually observe anything. You want me to do a quick work-up on him, I’m going to need to speak directly with him. Raymond Reddington is an experienced criminal. There has to be a reason why he turned himself in. Why today. This is going to be business as usual, I don’t care whose popularity contest he’s winning. I need to establish trust and I can’t do that with you all gawking at us like it’s your first porn. Knock off the fishbowl mentality. Stay back and I’ll get as many answers as I can. Have I made myself clear?”

The Assistant Director was unhappy with her taking charge “You’re on your way out and now you think you’re running my show? You’re only here because he asked for you.”

She stopped and turned to him quickly, causing him to stop much too close than was certainly professional “I am sorry if your panties are in a bunch. I was called in here specifically to talk to Reddington, get answers, and provide the FBI with a recent and accurate profile. If you want someone else, I am more than happy to take Red to the park for a nice relaxing lunch.”

He sighed and open and closed his mouth repeatedly as if unsure of what to say next. So she helped him out by walking away.

_Shit. Red. The dog._ He was always so excited to see Raymond. She leaned down to Red and said “Be good boy. Alert.” That was his command to be professional and on the lookout for trouble. She used the moment to close her eyes and take a deep breath. And hoped like hell they made it through this.

Red helped her navigate around the corner and stopped abruptly. She had no idea where Raymond what, but didn’t have to wait long because she was soon welcomed with “Agent Keen. What a pleasure.

**TBC...**


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red is at the Post Office, but he and Lizzie are separated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are tons of questions, I know. They will get to take their trip…eventually. I promise. There’s just a bit of a wrinkle or five. Look at it this way-it will be many more chapters,lol. This one is another long one for you. I still feel guilty for making you wait for so long.   
> Disclaimed, as usual. I own nothing and make no money off of this.

_His voice. Stay calm._ “Well, I’m here.” She attempted for an air on nonchalance that she simply didn’t feel and it came out flat.

Red barked excitedly, but quieted when she snapped “ _Heel”_. She hadn’t meant to be so sharp, but she was on edge enough as it was.

“Mr. Reddington, what exactly do you need me for? I’m nobody.” She knew that he wouldn’t endanger her by implying that they had a preexisting relationship. She racked her brain and could come up with no other plausible theories as to why he would give up his freedom, his life.

 

******

 

She was beautiful. He ached to hold her, but that would all have to wait. He had to get her out of this building and out of the country. He knew that she would be testy that he ignored her question, but there were bigger things at stake than her displeasure at him turning himself in. “Agent Keen, Lizzie. There’s a man by the name of Anslo Garrick and he is going to overtake this facility. An Agent here is his target. _Anyone_ that does not leave now will be slaughtered. If you wish to prevent the senseless loss of human life, you will evacuate immediately.”

He wished she could see him now, to communicate non-verbally, but he’d just have to hope that she understood that it was her that was in danger. He wouldn’t have turned himself in for any other reason.

“We’re in danger?” He should give her more credit. She is so perceptive he really shouldn’t have doubted her.

“Grave danger. Evacuate immediately…..please.” The last word, barely more than a breath of air, huffed out so softly that she may not have even heard.

Her voice rose. She knew they were being monitored. “What is your role in the incursion? Distraction? What are we supposed to do with you while we are running like cowards? Why would you care enough to risk your freedom and now your life? We are equipped to deal with anything that may occur, even an attack. We’re the FBI, not the Boy Scouts.”

He was reading her message loud and clear. She was trying to get him to explain without exposing the truth while peppering in questions that she was expected to ask. Except she was worried about him. The other agents would interpret it as worry that she was in danger, but her face reflected her worry for him. She didn’t want to leave him for fear that he may be injured or killed. She was going to stay and he had to do whatever he could to prevent that.

“Your dog, what’s his name?” He asked softly. She didn’t look surprised by his change of subject, but then again, she was already used to all of his verbal machinations.

She quirked a wry smile “His name is Red. He’s wonderful, but I think that sometimes he forgets that we are supposed to be taking care of each other. He thinks that he is my protector rather than my partner. He’s just a dog so he doesn’t realize how truly lost I would be without him in my life.”

His heart swelled at the thought of her declaring that she would be lost without him. “Agent Keen, perhaps you should also realize that your dog lives only for you. He knows that he has to do whatever it takes to keep you safe. He would gladly die for you…unlike humans, who have no idea the value of absolute loyalty and adoration. Your mutt understands more about the human condition than everyone under this roof. Don’t let his death be pointless.”

He tried to keep his emotions at bay, let his voice become tinged with anger and a bit of bitterness. He had to get her out of here without making anyone suspicious.

He needed to grow a pair and piss her off enough to leave.

“I think we’re done here, Agent Keen. I conveyed to you my message, now I am ready to go into your holding cell.” He could escape if they gave him a moment alone. FBI holding cells were a notorious joke.

But Lizzie wasn’t the one who answered him. It was her partner, Agent Ressler. “Oh, I have just the spot for you. No more holding cell for you. Technology is a beautiful thing. You won’t be escaping The Box anytime soon”

 

 

Lizzie was pissed that her partner had come between them. “I am fully capable of escorting Reddington.” Even though she was on limited duty and confined to the Post Office during her shifts, she needed to get Raymond alone, if only for a moment.

She sighed, not wanting to put up too much of a protest. Ressler walked away from her and by the sound of Raymond’s grunt, Ressler was none too gentle with pulling him up by his cuffs. She almost said something, but was saved by Red who emitted a soft growl. _Crap_. “Come on Red” She had to get him away from Raymond before one of them maimed Ressler.

Halfway back to her office, a shout went up and Red stiffened beside her. Her world, which had become perpetually grey and shadowy, became black once again. The lights. Someone had cut the power to the facility. She had to find cover.

It didn’t take long for the emergency lights to kick on, but this wasn’t grey or shadowy, or even white. It was…it must be orange, but it was darker, maybe even red. How ironic that her first color would be red. It brought tears to her eyes, but she dashed them away angrily. She had to get her head back in the game.

Her office was on a different floor than where she was right now. She had to assume that whomever was here would have the stairs guarded. There were offices on this floor and she had to get to them. One would have a landline phone and she needed to call for back-up before they interrupted the lines.

She rounded two more corners, feeling the walls along the way, finally finding an doorway that she sincerely hoped was an office. “Chair” she whispered to Red, hoping to save herself the time of looking everywhere.

He led her to a chair, but is wasn’t an office chair, just a chair regular chair with arms. She muttered “Not this one” even though she knew that he would have absolutely zero idea what the hell she was talking about. But then he moved, and he walked her right up to the desk “Oh, aren’t you such a smart cookie. Mama’s so proud of you.” Hopefully no one was outside, because she probably just gave herself away.

She felt around the desk, trying not to knock anything over, and finally located the phone. She picked it up and heard nothing but the shrill beeps that indicated the lines had already been disconnected.

Deciding on a different course of action, she opened the desk drawer and pulled out everything that could be used as a weapon. Pens, letter opener, and a few paperclips may come in handy. She came across a rectangular object. A cell phone! And not a touch-screen phone. She could use a phone with buttons. She dialed 911, hoping, but not actually counting on having a signal. Moments later a woman’s robotic sounding voice stated “911, what’s your emergency?”

 

*****

 

Raymond decided that under different circumstances, he may actually not hate Donald Ressler. When the lights cut out, he actually shielded him to protect him. That spoke of a man with honor. He was still incompetent, but all least he had some integrity to balance it out.

“I need to get you to the cell, you’ll be safe there.”

“You need to not worry about me and get Agent Keen out of here.” He couldn’t think of her right now or he would go insane. She could already be injured or dead and that just wasn’t an option, so he pushed it out of his mind. Just in time too.

Ressler was distracted by his mention of his partner and turned to address him. Which saved him from being shot point blank. Red pushed himself into the commando and it threw his shot wide. The shotgun blast still caught Ressler in the leg, and he immediately cried out in pain and fell to the ground.

Before their attacker could right himself so take another clear shot, Red head-butted him as hard as possible, causing black spots to dance before his eyes. It worked, the man slumped to the floor.

Red quickly utilized the time to take the keys from Ressler as he held his leg in pain “I knew it, you’re part of this.”

He divested himself of the cuffs, but tucked them into his pocket along with the keys just in case.

“Shut up Donald, you don’t know shit. In fact, I am in the process of saving your government issued, but the book life. Keep quiet and close the door to the box. We will have one minute to gather supplies and drag our butts before it closes.”

Ressler stood with Red’s assistance “How do you know that? It’s brand new technology.”

“I know everything about this facility, boy.”

Ressler stood, propped up against the wall, and entered in the code to initiate the closing sequence while Red raided the First Aid cabinet and the weapons of the unconscious man on the floor. He rushed up behind Ressler and drug him along with him.

He had to get Ressler inside of the box and hope that he could help himself before he passed out. His only objective was to get Lizzie before Garrick did.

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think:)


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red is in the Box and Liz is on her own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is graphically violent. I’m going to go out on a limb and state that it’s RATED M FOR VIOLENCE. If that’s not your thing, don’t read, please. Don’t worry though, I’m pretty certain that the next chapter will be worse   
> After this chapter, I am going to change the rating so if you are interested in more updates favorite/follow or adjust your filters.  
> That said, thank you so freaking much for all of the wonderful reviews! I love hearing from you and I am so happy that you are still reading. You guys are rock stars!!!  
> Disclaimed, as always.

The sound of shots and shouting from behind Red as he threw Donald into the box cornered Red into following behind him. He couldn’t help Lizzie if he were dead and these fools were shooting indiscriminately, mowing down everyone in their path.

He aimed and fired, taking down as many as he could as he backed into the cage. Three were dead before he had even taken two steps. _Not bad for an old man._

There hadn’t been enough time for Lizzie to get out. He would have to trust in his security team that had followed them to the Post Office. He had a tracker embedded into his skin and so did Red. Unless Lizzie was separated from him, they would be able to find her. He would be off the radar thanks to the DARPA manufactured box they were inside of.

The final whoosh of air as the cell sealed felt more final, brought about more anxiety than he anticipated. By sealing himself in, he had no way of getting to Lizzie until someone let him out.

Agent Ressler’s groan of pain reminded him that he could help and maybe take his mind off of Lizzie so he helped him settle down on the metal bunk and got to work.

 

*****

 

She hung up the phone as a door crashed open. It was close, but it wasn’t to the office she was in. They were searching the offices and she needed to think fast.

She palmed the letter opener and cut her arm open, causing a superficial wound that she hoped would bleed. She didn’t want to have to repeat the action. The coppery smelling, sticky wetness told her that she was successful. She took the blood and smeared it everywhere she could. Hoping to look more wounded than she was.

Most men would never consider a wounded woman as a threat, let alone a blind one covered in blood.

She rushed Red to the corner behind the door and told him to stay. She decided not to hide. Crouching down would put her at a physical disadvantage, one that she couldn’t hope to overcome. So she sat and hoped that whomever was coming, was alone.

She didn’t have to wait long before the door slammed against the wall with a crash. “Please help me! I can’t see. The FBI, they were holding me and one of them stabbed me. I’m blind, please help!” She only saw one dark shadow against the red backdrop and prayed he was alone. She heard the brush of metal and hoped it was a sign of him standing down. “Are you Elizabeth Keen?”

“Yes, how did you know? Are you here to rescue me? Thank you!” She took a gamble and threw herself towards him, still holding the letter opener against her leg. He caught her to his side, his grip bruising, but she just gritted her teeth, only a couple more seconds. “Did you bring help? This place is crawling with FBI.”

“I was just looking for you. I’ll take you to Garrick…he’s uh, here to rescue you.” He was lying and she could tell, but he probably didn’t want a combative captive.

“Thank you so much. I hurt my leg, I don’t think I can walk very well.” She put her arm around his neck, almost in a hug. A typical man, he froze at being so close to her chest and she struck. She brought her arm holding the letter opener around and jabbed it twice into his neck. She made sure to keep her own injury away from his. She didn’t know what kind of health he was in and it was always better to be safe than sorry.

He gurgled his last breath against her, bathing the front of her in blood. It made her want to vomit, but it would prove useful should she come across someone else. She drug him to the side behind the door to where Red was whining for her and dumped him there. Hopefully the body was enough out of the way that it wouldn’t be spotted right away. The blood she couldn’t do anything about that now.

She had contemplated taking his gun, but thought that would mess up her ‘damsel in distress’ ploy. It’s not like she could tell the difference between people or even make sure she hit a target to begin with.

“Red, let’s go.” He came to her side and led the way. Hopefully their combined senses would be enough to keep them safe.

They moved in the opposite direction of wherever they heard noise of any kind. At this point, Liz thought that the majority of agents were captured or dead and tried to locate the stairs.

When she finally found them, she walked up the single flight to where her office was located. She thought she saw a shadow coming towards her, but when nothing happened and no one accosted her, she just kept moving. Until Red leapt away from her with a growl and she heard a choking scream that was quickly silenced. Red returned to her with a wet face. She shuddered to think of what they looked like. She was trying to go for helpless, but with her dog looking like a killer, that wasn’t going to fly.

 

*****

 

Red hadn’t had to play field medic on anyone but himself in a very long time. He was glad that he still had the touch.

It didn’t hurt that he pissed off Anslo Garrick in the process. Telling him the story about him switching ammo was a new and entertaining plateau for him. Garrick narrowed his good eye at the implication that Red would have been successful if only he had stuck to the hollow-points he usually favored.

What he was attempting to accomplish, was keep Garrick’s attention on him. If he was here, he wasn’t with Lizzie. Agent Ressler’s wound was cauterized and he’d bought him some more time. There was really nothing else he could do for him.

Garrick had paraded the FBI agents he’d captured and threatened them with execution. Lizzie wasn’t one of them so he couldn’t muster up the compassion needed to feel bad. He told them what would happen. They chose to not call for help or evacuate.

He could try to fool himself all he wanted, but the truth was that he was responsible for this mess. He had put Lizzie on Anslo’s radar by spending an unusually large amount of time with her. Garrick was so low-rent that he probably just googled her and found out every detail of her life. The internet was a dangerous thing. But he’s confident that Anslo Garrick will soon come to realize that Raymond Reddington is far deadlier than he anticipated and he should never have brought Lizzie into his play for revenge.

“Well what do we have here?” Raymond jerked up his head at the satisfaction that oozed from Garrick’s voice. _Lizzie._ She was being led by three men. He clothes were ripped and she looked like she was soaking wet. As she moved closer to the cage, he caught the sheen in the light. _Blood. Oh, god no._ It was all over her, seemingly from head to toe. She looked like a garish caricature of herself. Her head was bowed, so he had no way to tell if there was pain written on her face.

He wanted to fall to his knees, curse whatever gods existed for allowing this to happen. But he knew that the cause was him alone.

Garrick pushed her down to her knees in front of the cage. When she finally rose her head, his breath caught. She looked pissed, not hurt. “I hope you know that the full force of the FBI is right outside the building, waiting for you to come out. A sniper’s bullet even has your name on it.”

“You don’t know anything about me, but I know everything about you.”

She smiled a sweet, guileless grin and said “Well, I wasn’t certain how you spelled your name and Anslo Garrick is quite long, so I just had them engrave ‘pussy’ on it. I think that’s quite accurate, wouldn’t you agree Red?”

She was looking straight at him. Could she see him? He tried to give her a reassuring smile without showing too much emotion because the second Garrick figured out Red’s priorities, the game was finished, over.

Garrick circled her body while he spoke “This one. This one is special isn’t she Red? She says she is blind, yet she took down five of my men with nothing but a letter opener. Daddy Rostova will be so excited to hear that his baby girl joined the family business.” Lizzie didn’t react but turned her head slightly to the side as if looking for something.

Garrick was behind her and put his arm around her body and across her chest, squeezing her painfully that she couldn’t even begin to hold in her scream.

“If you don’t come out, I am going to have a lot more fun with your girl here and you’re going to have to watch the entire show. Deal?”

Red turned to Ressler who had lost consciousness smacked his face, halfway reopened his would to wake him up, get a reaction from him. “Ah! What the hell?! You’re not going to kill me, you just saved my life.” He propped Ressler up so the he could have a clear view of Lizzie in Garrick’s clutches “If you can’t save her, you’re of no use to me anyway.”

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red accidentally tells Liz something. Liz and Red are tortured. Rated M for Violence! You have been warned...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being so amazing! This one involves the torture of Red and Liz. Pretty violent, but some brief fluff as well. Rating has changed to M, just in case.   
> I want to give a shout out to Hestia Prytaneum for her advice when I was stuck! This one’s for you!  
> Disclaimed, as always.

Although his gut clenched and his chest ached, Raymond had no problem holding the gun to Agent Ressler’s head. No, his problem was with turning his back on Lizzie and Garrick. Seconds can seem longer than minutes and he could turn around to find her dead, or worse.

“Donald, it’s time.” He looked at him and tried to convey the seriousness of the situation and how committed he was to putting a few more bullet holes into him to convince him to give up the code.

“Romeo. The code is R-O-M-E-O, Romeo.” Raymond dropped Ressler back down on the bed with a ‘thud’ and turned to wait for the door to open.

Once he was led out by Garrick’s men he looked at him as if confused to see him “Anslo, what are you doing here?” Anslo didn’t answer, just backhanded him and turned away. “Don’t forget the girl.”

He panicked. His mind raced to figure out what to say to talk Garrick out of taking Lizzie with them “Why take the girl? She’s dead weight. All she does is increase your chances of getting caught exponentially. You said yourself that she took down five of your men. She’s deadly, feral. A problem that you just don’t need.” He tried to keep the pride from his voice. She was so resourceful, so amazing.

The amount of blood on her couldn’t all be hers or she would have passed out long ago. She was injured though and it broke his heart. She was walking with a limp and whimpered every few seconds when they tried to move her. She hadn’t even acknowledged him since he was inside of the cage.

His heart sank again when he realized that they weren’t leaving through the floor level entrances. They were going deeper into the bowels of the building and he wasn’t prepared for that.

They were thrown into the back of a box truck. The doors slammed shut, shrouding them in darkness. He hadn’t even taken a breath to speak before Lizzie was on him. She was still tied so she was awkwardly leaning across his body.

“Oh god Raymond, are you alright? I am so glad you made it to the cage before the shooting started. I was so worried.” She kissed his cheek and nuzzled against the side of his face.

“Me, don’t worry about me. What about you, Lizzie? What the hell happened to you? You are covered in blood. Where are you hurt?” He wished he could hold her, but he was cuffed. Apparently the ability to murder with a shower caddy was frowned upon.

She snorted. His concern was endearing. She must have went a little overboard with the war paint. “I’m fine. I’m not injured except for a tiny stab wound on my arm-which I did myself so stop freaking out. The rest of the blood is theirs. I figured if they thought I was injured they would discount me as a threat. Which five of them did…well, four. Red took out one. Did I overdo it with the blood? I couldn’t actually see well enough to tell…Anyways, I heard three of them coming and I knew I could pick them off one by one, but definitely not three. They had guns and I don’t have a death wish so I locked Red in the bathroom with the water running in case he gets thirsty. Well, I guess there’s a body in there too, but hopefully he won’t eat him. I don’t want him to catch anything”

He was so relieved and in awe of her resourcefulness. Then he huffed a laugh in utter disbelief. “You stabbed yourself? You killed five men and hid your seeing-eye dog before turning yourself over? I am absolutely, beyond any shadow of a doubt in love with you.”

He really hadn’t meant to say that. He was just emotional and mentally reeling to find a way out of this. All of that combined with how truly extraordinary she was made him blurt out his feelings.

She looked at him. Really looked at him as if seeing him for the first time. She opened her mouth to speak but lurched to the side when the truck screeched to a halt. The moment was lost as he scrambled to place his body in front of hers as he hissed “Don’t do anything to draw attention to yourself.”

 

*****

 

They were led into an old warehouse in an industrial park, not too far from the Post Office. _Big mistake._ Red thought. Anslo Garrick was stull dumber than a box of rocks. His team would be here within minutes with an extraction planned within an hour. They just had to hold out until then.

“This is a little nicer than what you’re used to Anslo. You’ve come up in the world.” Anslo chuckled, refusing to be baited by Red’s words.

“String them up here. Facing each other. Reddington needs to be close enough to enjoy the view.”

Garrick immediately started punching him. His fists were like anvils. The hits were painful, but the fact that they were centered on his kidneys meant that he would most likely be pissing blood for days. No matter. Every single second that the focus was on him was one more second it wasn’t on Lizzie.

He stole a glance at her, and immediately decided against making that mistake again. She was biting her lip and tears were streaming down her cheeks. Her head was slightly bowed so they fell to the floor. He could tell that she was fighting back sobs. He looked at the ground and stayed focused on not making a sound.

Garrick turned from him. He’d been watching Lizzie the entire time. “Well, looks like we’ve got her nice and softened up, she’s ready for a shot.” Red struggled for the first time against his cuffs. “She knows nothing. If its answers you want, I’ve got them. You want what I know? Don’t touch her.”

Garrick didn’t even spare a glance at him “Oh, I think she knows much more than what you think. Razve eto ne verno , Masha?”

Red froze ‘ _Isn’t that right, Masha?’_ …Anslo had more information than he anticipated. Someone had been telling tales out of school.

Lizzie looked up as a man walked from behind her and jabbed a needle into her neck. He threw the needle to the side and said “I’ve been anxiously awaiting my turn.”

Red roared and fought “What did you inject in her? She is FBI. She’s been trained to withstand whatever ‘truth serum’ you’ve pumped into her. That’s beside the fact that she simply does not have the information you’re looking for! Garrick! Look at me!”

“The great Raymond Reddington is showing his belly. Finally has a weakness. Too bad it’s not my mission to exploit it. It’s always been her. We just never knew where she was-until you led her to us. So thank you for that. And for your information, it’s nothing so pedantic as a truth serum. What is this 1983? This will make her feel such unimaginable pain that she will long to feel the breath of fresh air that is being burned alive. That’s certainly no walk in the park. Wouldn’t you agree?”

He didn’t even hear half of what Garrick said, his focus was so intent on Lizzie’s face. He could see that it was beginning to take effect. She was shaking uncontrollably, but she had yet to make a sound of distress. She looked in his direction and winked. Winked. He almost groaned. Must she always be so provoking?

Anslo must have decided that playtime was over because he nodded to the man that was still behind Lizzie who then came around to the front of her and slapped her in the face.

Red cringed, full of rage and despair. He memorized every feature of the man because when they got out of there, if he didn’t get a skull full of bullets, then Red wanted to make sure that he knew everything about him so he could find him again.

He hit her again and again, all over her body, until she finally made a sound. She was out of breath as she tried to speak “Danielle Gillespe punched harder than you and we were in the fourth grade.”

“Lizzie, no.” He pleaded with her, attempting to once again pull the focus from her. It worked.

“That’s right, Masha. How could I be so remiss in not taking advantage of the situation that we find ourselves in…I am going about this all wrong. Bring in the knives.”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think:)


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An end to the torment, but Red may have to leave Liz.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being so amazing! the messages, reviews, and Kudos keep my muse fed!  
> Disclaimed, as always.

Liz could see a figure walking towards Raymond. She couldn’t yet see fine details, but she could see that he was wearing dark clothing and he was holding something shiny.

She knew that in his life as a criminal that this isn’t the first time, nor would it be likely to be the last time that he was harmed, tortured.

She didn’t care.

She knew that she would break soon. Her pain was horrific, but the thought of Raymond being harmed settled a burning rage inside her of the likes she’d never known. Her breathe, which she had just gotten under control quickened again. Her pain receded as her adrenaline levels spiked once again. Ike the last time, it had nothing to do with her.

Her vision sharpened narrowed on the display in front of her. Garrick took a blade and sliced down the inside of Raymond’s arm suspended above him. His face didn’t change, he never made a sound. Not by word or deed did he even acknowledge that Garrick even touched him, let alone flayed his arm open. Blood welled and dripped down into his face. No change of expression, not even a twitch.

Garrick took the knife and walked around to Raymond’s side, but she screamed “NOOOO!” before he made another cut. “What do you want to know?”

Garrick walked towards her “I want to know where the Fulcrum is. Your father sent me to get it from you. If you are wondering how he knows you have it, it is because he gave it to you.”

He mind whirled with the possibilities of what that could mean. She had no idea what the hell he was talking about. She was adopted. Her father was dead. There’s always the possibility that Anslo Garrick worked for her birth father, but she had no real memories of him. Every time she tried, she came up blank.

She had to make him believe that she had what he wanted. If no one was coming to help them, then she would do whatever she had to help them. She would kill and lie to keep Raymond safe. She’d already proved that five times over just that day. She had no compunction with doing it over and over again.

“I have it. But you’ll never get it while we’re here. It’s not even in this state. It’s buried in an entirely different time zone. So if you want to come within three counties of The Fulcrum, you are going to let us go and we can meet in three days at the Washington Monument. Take it or leave it.”

She tried not to look at Red. As much as she wanted to let him know that she could see, the advantages of her being perceived as blind were far too beneficial, at this point.

Movement outside of one of the high windows gave her hope that their rescue was imminent. She had one final move to make, but she needed Garrick to come closer.

She coughed about a dozen times, causing every nerve-ending to shrivel in pain. She allowed whimpers of pain to escape her lips and bent her head forward as much as she could. She whispered Garrick’s name. So low that he would have to come closer if he wanted to hear more.

His back was turned towards her and she nodded at Red, hoping that he would understand her need for him to play along. He didn’t give any indication that he’d heard her, so she’d just have to cross her fingers that he wouldn’t let his protective nature out.

“What? Speak up, bitch!” A blow landed to the side of her head, causing her vision to momentarily double.

Finally he was close enough. “Reddington has a question for you.” She said it low still, even though she knew he would most likely hit her again.

Garrick whirled “Oh yeah? What’s that?”

Liz grabbed ahold of the chain, lifted her feet into the air and wrapped them around Anslo Garrick’s miserable neck. She squeezed him despite the punches, scratches, and slaps that he was attacking her with.

The man who injected her grabbed her around her throat, choked her as she choked his boss, when suddenly Raymond was beside them. He punched the man holding her once in the side of the head. He let go immediately, and should have stepped away. The fact that he didn’t gave Raymond an opportunity to get behind him and snap his neck, or at least that is what it sounded like from behind her.

She coughed as her throat convulsed violently in an attempt to inhale. She could hear bullets firing all around the room where they were being held. The high ceilings were creating an echo that nearly deafened her.

Throughout the entire scuffle, she never loosened her hold. She hadn’t even noticed that Garrick had stopped fighting. She still couldn’t bring herself to let him go. He would die for what he did to Raymond.

He finally moved into her field of vision but didn’t bother looking into her face as he spoke because he had no idea that she could see “I think you can let go now, sweetheart. I can take it from here.” He picked up a gun that had been dropped and raided Garrick’s pockets for spare clips.

She coughed again as she tried to speak “How did you get out of the cuffs?”

He just blinked comically at her, his head tilted to the side and smiled “I’m a criminal, Lizzie.” _Oh, duh._

She felt a little foolish. Of course Raymond would have picked up the skill of lock-picking to escape different situations somewhere along the years. She jumped when she felt him touch her legs in an effort to get her to relax and let go of Garrick. _Oh._

Red pushed him to the side and felt around the cuffs on her wrists. Everything sounded…muffled. As if she were under water.

“I’ve got you sweetheart. You look a tad shock-y. I’m going to help you put your arms down. They are going to hurt very badly at first, but I am going to massage them and at first that is going to make it feel worse. I need you to not fight me though alright? I’m just trying to help. No more letter openers on you anywhere, right?”

She heard him, knew that he was trying to make her feel better, but everything was in a fog. There was only one thing on her mind though. “Raymond.” Her voice was hoarse, raspy from being choked. She wanted so badly to tell him that she loved him.

She opened her mouth to speak, but the burning pins and needles sensation overtook her and she let out a strangled scream. “Shh, I’ve got you. There, it’s already feeling better. It’s all over. I’m never going to let anything happen to you ever again. I swear it.”

His words were so even they lulled her into feeling calmer, more settled. She still felt her body shake from the pain, but she felt as if she was held by him. And it was wonderful.

Until the fog cleared and she remembered every single one of his injuries. “Oh my god, Raymond, your arm, we need to get you to a doctor. Let me see.”

He must have thought it was just an expression because he didn’t show any surprise, just continued trying to comfort her with “It’s alright. I’m fine. It’s just a scratch. Nothing for you to worry about. We need to get you to the hospital and have some tests run. I have an in at a private hospital. You will receive the best of care. You’ll have a security team, the best around I assure you-“

She put a hand over his mouth “You’re leaving me?” Tears had already started to fall again at the prospect of him leaving her.

She could face anything as long as they were together. Apart? This was an entirely new experience and she had no idea who she could trust. She wished his words were as comforting as his voice “Lizzie, I will have to, at least temporarily. The FBI needs to think I’ve left-escaped. They are not going to believe that I would stick around out of altruism. To do so would put you under even further scrutiny.”

“I have so much to tell you Raymond and I can’t do that if you’re not there. I do however, not want you to jeopardize your freedom. You owe me a trip around the world and I’m not going to let you welch on it.”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz wakes up alone at the hospital, but soon gets not one, but two surprises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your continued support! I love hearing from everyone. Sorry that you had to wait for so long for this one. It’s a longer one, so I hope it was worth the wait.   
> Disclaimed as always.

Liz slowly came to awareness. The physicians and nurses hadn’t let her sleep for more than an hour at a time and her disposition reflected her exhaustion and worry

She would have liked to be a good patient, but the fact was that Raymond brought her to the hospital, explained to the physician that if anything went wrong while she was under his care he wouldn’t live out the day, kissed her on the forehead and left.

That was yesterday.

She was worried. Her anxiety was off the charts. She couldn’t stand being away from Raymond. Her chest ached and her throat was on fire from her constant battle with tears.

She didn’t want to examine why she was so anxious, but the rational, functioning adult inside of her with a psychology degree made her. It wasn’t the tightening of the blood pressure cuff or the incessant questions of what her level of pain was now and to point at the unhappy face that reflected the level.

It was because she could see.

Her vision, while still fuzzy sometimes, was back. And she was terrified.

Throughout the years, she couldn’t count the number of nights she’d spent crying and screaming into her pillow, cursing the fates that allowed her to be blinded. And yet, there she lay, terrified of her entire world.

The one thing that she had wish for the most came true but in reality was a monster that spawned unimaginable fear within her.

So long she had relied on consistency and schedules that everything was now upside down and inside out. And she hated herself for her weakness. She should be able to adapt. She was better, stronger than that.

Her decision to not tell anyone about her vision returning was a sound one. She would have told Raymond, but he left her. It was increasingly hard to hide it from the staff as her thirst for new sights was unquenchable. To look at facial features and recognize what made each person unique unto themselves was a beautiful thing. And she wanted to absorb as much beauty as she could.

 

 

Part of the instructions that were left for the staff was to place an anonymous call reporting her whereabouts to the FBI.

Within minutes, the facility was overrun with federal agents. One of which was Agent Mojtabai, who hugged her and said “I’m glad you’re ok, Keen. I have a surprise for you.” She was surprised at how handsome he looked. He was a technological genius, so she had always figured he was a glasses and pocket protector kind of guy. She was also operating under the visual knowledge of a teenager.

She really didn’t feel like dealing with anything Aram might consider a surprise, but she humored him “What is it?” she sighed. He radioed another agent and suddenly the biggest meanest horse looking dog she’d ever seen was led into the room.

She whispered “Red?” She would know the feel of him, but had no idea that this rabid looking dog was the very one that saved her life and allowed her to escape. No wonder Raymond had chosen this dog. Anyone would think twice before approaching them. Someone must have cleaned him up because there was no sign of their escapades from the prior day.

He barked and his nails scrambled for purchase on the tiled hospital floor. He stopped before running into the bed, sliding a little. He then sat perfectly still but placed one large paw gingerly next to her hip on the bed, as if he sensed her pain and had no wish to harm her.

She ran her fingers through the soft hair on his face and closed her eyes. It was him! She was so overwhelmingly hay that he was safe that she started to cry. He was so brave and loyal.

“How long did if take you to find him? Was he injured?” She petted the bed next to her and encouraged Red to climb into bed with her so she could run her hands over his body to ascertain for herself that he was well.

It wasn’t long before she yawned. She could barely keep her eyes opened. “Thank you Aram, for bringing my baby to me. We’ll be fine though now. It was nice seeing you, but I am really tired.” She didn’t even look to see if he was readying to leave, just snuggled in closer to Red’s fur.

“Sorry to tire you out, Agent Keen. I just knew you’d need him and couldn’t wait to be reunited. Besides, he was anxious and pacing the floors, growling and making everyone at the Post Office nervous. I’ll uh, just go now.” She just waved, being polite was just a little too hard now that one of her worries was safe and calmed her tumultuous emotions.

 

*****

 

“I leave for a day and I come back to find you in bed with another male.” He sighed as if truly disappointed. Her eyes snapped open and immediately found his.

That voice. She would recognize it anywhere. _Raymond Reddington._ She looked into his face and then couldn’t help as her gaze wandered down his perfectly tailored suit. He was looking at Red who was licking his hand in greeting and smiling so he hadn’t noticed her prying eyes. He was the most handsome, mesmerizing man she’d ever seen. His hat was tilted at a jaunty angle. His dark blue coat was perfectly accented with the upturned collar. She ran her eyes back up to his and found that he was looking right at her.

His smile faded as he realized that she was looking him right in the eye. “Lizzie? Do you have some news you’d like to share with me?”

Her relief at his return made her giddy so she decided to tease him “I don’t think I’m in the sharing mood. Some guy left me here to worry ceaselessly.” She pretended to be upset, but she held her hand out for him to come closer. He came to her immediately and took her hand. He pressed his lips to the back and then rested her palm against is cheek. He closed his eyes as if her touch brought him peace.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I had to get you help and the FBI had to think that I’d disappeared. I so badly wanted to stay here with you and make sure that you were alright, but I won’t be any good to anyone locked in a cell. I was surprised to hear that they left you alone here, but their priority is finding one of their most wanted criminals, not protecting their most beautiful and valuable asset, which goes to show you that your talents are wasted with those baboons. Now. Tell me. How well can you see and how long have you been able to? None of the staff here has reported to me that your vision had returned”

She brought her other hand up to cradle the other side of his face and leaned forward to touch her lips briefly to his. “I suppose your reasoning makes sense, but that doesn’t make being separated any easier. And to answer your questions, I’ve been able to see clearly since…Garrick. It’s still fuzzy sometimes, but anything is better than being blind.” She hated to bring up that monster and what he could have done to him, to them. “How is your arm, have you been to the doctor?”

He dismissed her concern with an elaborate wave of his hand “I’m fine, just a few stitches. I’m infinitely more worried about you. Have you had any…lasting effects from the shot?”

“No. I still hurt, but I think it’s more from before I turned myself over to Garrick.” She huffed a laugh that didn’t contain even an ounce of humor. Red stiffened beside her, a deep frown now marring his handsome features. He swallowed “I know we haven’t had much of an opportunity to speak and the physician hadn’t said anything about internal injuries, but…we’re you harmed…badly?” His question was so filled with grief and rage that at first she didn’t quite understand.

“Well, there were five of them Raymond. One Red did take care of, but the rest I had to take care of by myself. They didn’t exactly take it easy on me. Why do you thing I was covered in blood?”

He let out a moan of pure pain. His eyes were squeezed shut and he was shaking his head back and forth as if banishing a thought from his mind. His voice was broken and barely above a whisper “I’m so damn sorry Lizzie. I swear that we’ll get you the best help from the world’s best psychologists… I will be there for you every step of the way. I want you to know that this changes nothing. I love you and there is nothing that will ever change that.”

Her mind immediately grasped his declaration of love, but was slow to acknowledge his other words. “Wait…what would I need therapy…Oh my god, no! Raymond no! Look at me. They didn’t touch me that way. I would have never…they got a few good hits in here and there, but otherwise nothing else happened, I swear it.”

His lips crashed into hers and she tasted his salty tears. His grief, which was just so palpable, quickly morphed into an overwhelming relief. He pulled his head back and said “I didn’t mean to jump to conclusions, but I was so worried about what happened when we were separated. I am messing this all up. This is our first official meeting.”

He steed back and held out his hand for her to shake. She grabbed it because she wanted that contact with him again, but was confused at his words.

He clasped her hand gently but firmly “Hello, I know you’ve probably not seen me around before as I am on the run from every faction of US government law enforcement, but I am Raymond Reddington.”

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think:)


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red and Liz have a heart to heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry about the delay! Thank you so much for the reviews and the continued support. You guys are so wonderful, I have no words. I have family visiting this week and then I am going on vacation next week, so hopefully I’ll be able post some updates for you!   
> Warning: Major Fluff ahead.   
> Disclaimed, as usual.

Liz laughed at his silly display. “I believe, sir that we have met before. I would hate to think of us as strangers. Especially since we are soon to embark on a trip together. And I’ve had some pretty naughty thoughts about you. It would be awful, if I had to wait to get to know you all over again…Patience has never been one of my strengths.”

His eyes switched from playful to molten lava in a single blink. His voice which had just been filled with grief and then relief, deepened into such a low timbre that it was little more than a growl. She closed her eyes so that she could fully absorb his words “Naughty thoughts? I am dying to hear them. I’ve had more than a few of my own. Unfortunately, we are both in less than stellar shape. I want to be one hundred percent before attempting to hang from any chandeliers.”

She laughed and smacked his arm “Red, you are incorrigible. And doomed for disappointment if you think I am going to be that crazy.”

He was back in a playful mood, which was probably a good thing. She was in the hospital, the least sexy environment on the planet, and covered with bruises. If he saw them, he would be enraged. It would be a weeks before she was back to looking normal. He took a beating as well, so at least they would match. She highly doubted that he would find any humor in that though.

“I think Red needs to go out and he’s probably hungry. Do you think that you could-“

He had already started for the door, talking to the dog the whole way “Of course, come on Red, you and I can go and pee on a tree. Try not to gloat about the fact that you’ve slept with my girl.” Raymond winked at Lizzie as she ushered Red off the bed “It’s ok baby. Mommy will be fine. You need to get taken care of now. Tell Raymond that if he pees on a tree with you, he’ll cause every woman in the vicinity to try and take my man. Bite them Red, don’t let anyone steal him from me.”

Raymond laughed “Never sweetheart. I’m yours.”

 

*****

 

When he returned, it was to Lizzie arguing with the physician.

“Raymond, I’m so glad you are back. This doctor won’t consider a second opinion. I need to see Nick. I need to have answers before I am discharged.”

He waved the physician out of the rom so that they could have a bit of privacy.

The man might be on his payroll, but he wasn’t in the business of taking chances with Lizzie’s life. Ever.

He frowned at her displeasure and in jealousy at referring to her eye specialist by his first name. It was unreasonable and he knew it, but he loved her beyond reason. “Lizzie, calm down. He was operating under instructions given to him to not allow any outsiders to see you. The FBI were a necessary evil. I had to ensure they’d stop searching for you. They won’t be expecting you back to work after this. We’re free. If you feel that you need to see the specialist, then I will go and get him myself. There is nothing more important to me than your health, I assure you.”

She sighed and he braced himself for the worst. “Raymond…I know you think it doesn’t matter, but I need to know that this is permanent. I can’t…I can’t have the life I want to have…with you if it means that you’ll be stuck with a blind woman. And before you voice the protests I know you are about to say, realize that I know you probably better than anyone else. For all of your misdeeds, you operate under a code of honor. You would commit yourself to me and stay, no matter how miserable and trapped you feel. All because you think I need you. But I don’t really, not yet. But if I let myself fall…if I fall any further in love with you, I will be selfish enough to not let you go.”

At her words, it was as if his entire being froze and then caught fire at an alarming rate. He wanted his words to convey how very deeply her felt, but didn’t want to scare her away. What he really wanted to tell her was that he didn’t give a damn if she was blind for the rest of her life, that he would always be there for her and that ‘this thing’ between them was already started and she can’t back down now. Because he’s already in too deep and he would murder, steal, and lie to keep her.

“Lizzie, sweetheart, I know this is important to you, which makes it important to me. I am so happy for you that your vision is returning, but that fact has no bearing on my feelings for you….I met a man in Tibet that dug two miles through a mountain, singlehandedly, with only the use of crude hand tools. When I asked him what was on the other side of the mountain that he wanted so badly, he said one word: Love. It turns out that his fiancé was from the neighboring village and was paralyzed from a childhood accident. She couldn’t traverse the mountain pass like everyone else, and he had a business to tend so that he could make a living and maintain worth in the eyes of his beloved. Her village was fairly flat and easy for her to travel about. His was rocky and underdeveloped. So every night, he would forgo sleep to dig by the light of a torch. It took him four years, but he eventually prevailed. All he said was that it ‘would have only taken three, but the mountain collapsed on day on top of him and broke both of his legs’. His fiancé begged him to stop, that they could visit and find a way to live separately and still be in love, but he wanted nothing to do with it.”

She was smiling at the story, happy about love conquering all, but he didn’t believe that she understood that he was telling her how he felt.

“Now you think I’m just telling a story, but I want, no need, you to understand that I would move mountains, take any number of broken bones and injuries, do anything at all-just so that I could be with you. Because I love you no matter if you are blind, paralyzed, or even one of those gross FBI Agents I’m always reading about in the papers.”

She laughed as she was supposed to, but there were tears in her eyes. She sniffled and dashed them away as she looked into his eyes. He missed their azure luminosity as she squeezed them shut and threw herself into his arms, shuddering as she whispered “I need you to be sure. I love you so much already. If you ever decide to leave me, blind or not, I’ll kill you myself.”

He threw back his head and laughed as he tightened his arms around her. Their adventures were just beginning and life would never be dull.        

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Important: This is kind of an ending…KIND OF. I have a few more chapters in the works, but I wanted to make sure that there was still interest. That I wasn’t just droning on and on for no reason. Let me know what you think, please. I really love this story(but I’m a little partial) and am more than happy to continue if that's what is wanted.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz and Red go to London.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As requested, I have about five more chapters planned…if these crazy kids do as planned. I wanted to go through the revenge sequence after Anslo Garrick, but that would have separated them, so instead chose to jump right in to their travels. Which would have separated them, so instead chose to jump right in to their travels. Which has given me so many ideas.   
> Disclaimed as usual.

She had no idea what she had been thinking. Not everything was sugar cookies and candy with Raymond Reddington. No, that would make things entirely too easy.

Liz was discharged from the hospital with care instructions that Raymond followed to the absolute letter. It was driving her insane with pushing liquids and Tylenol at her every six hours.

He hovered, badgered her to follow the physicians instructions even though he wouldn’t have done the same. If he wasn’t so adorable, she’d be pissed at the hypocrisy.

Once she was given the all clear, they immediately flew to London. He could have taken her anywhere, but she had told him a story that a postcard of Big Ben was one of the last sights that she could remember seeing so he chose London.

Red had brushed his thoughtfulness off by stating that it was as good of a place to start as any. She knew he often worked her future plans and hopes into the conversations they had for the purpose to make plans to fulfil them.

They checked in to the hotel and Lizzie asked if there was a pool. “Of course there is. If I had any idea that you would take an interest in the pool, I would have secured us an estate with a pool for more privacy.”

She wasn’t quite sure what his problem was. “Ray, there was a bathing suit in the clothes you had delivered. I’ve never wanted to venture into a pool alone, but now that I can, I’m going to take advantage of it. Besides, I think it will help my muscles, especially if they have a hot tub.”

 

She was enthusiastic, he couldn’t deny her request. He had no desire to go down to a public area and supervise men checking out Lizzie. She was stunning with all of her clothes on, let alone wearing a form-fitting bathing suit.

He made a point to avoid looking at her as she walked out of her bedroom wearing a long, concealing robe. He had no desire dealing with the erection that was sure to rise when she revealed her body to him.

When they reached the pool, thankfully it was empty, which improved his mood slightly. Until she took her robe off and hung it on the wall by the hot tub. A murderous rage made him grip his hands until he thought the skin might break.

She was covered, shoulder to shin in bruises of every color. Hating himself, he moved to the door to lock it and stand watch. Relaxation was no longer in the cards for him. He should have known that she was more injured than she portrayed. He should have asked if she needed stronger pain pills. So many things he should have done differently.

He wanted to howl at the injustice of it all. Instead of being her protector, she was the one who killed those that hurt her. He was robbed of the opportunity to put Garrick and his men in the ground with his own bare hands.

And that bathing suit. How three tiny triangles could ever be considered proper pool attire he would never know, but someone was going to get fired. Anyone could see her and the thought made him nearly cross-eyed with jealousy. He once considered jealousy a base emotion. Something that didn’t apply to him.

The possessiveness that he was experiencing was unlike anything he’d ever felt. This fire, once stoked, would consume them both.

Any other day, his cock would be hard enough to hammer rail road ties, but all he felt was grief and rage. His heart was breaking for every single mark that marred her skin.

She moaned as she lowered herself into the hot tub. He hated that she felt even a twinge of discomfort. They never would have left the hospital if he knew the extent of her injuries. He may in fact, have a physician to strangle if he found out that he let her leave the country against medical advice.

“Ray, pull up a chair and come sit with me since you’re not coming in. Nothing would make me happier than the sound of your voice right now.”

As he pulled a lounge chair across the room, he figured he may go easy on the good doctor. He could deny her nothing, so he wouldn’t expect anything else from a lesser mortal than himself. He snorted. Lizzie would be quick to cut him down should she know his thoughts.

This entire time, she had been enjoying her newfound freedom that sight provided her and had no idea of the riotous emotions flaying him raw, and for that he was glad. He didn’t want her to think that he found fault in her body. Which was perfect, just injured.

He had forgotten that she was so utterly oblivious to the appeal her body had for him, for others. She was stunning with clothes on. Nearly naked she was breathtaking.

 

*****

 

She could hear his heavy breathing after she took her robe off. She wished she could say it was because he was overcome with desire, but one glance at him from underneath her lashes told her that his posture was pure anger. She knew that she was covered in bruises and would have absolutely never suggested the trip to the pool if she had any anticipation of his reaction.

All her thoughts were centered on relief from the relentless ache. She’d had worse while learning to fight. Her instructor had no compunction with taking her down and she was glad for it. She wouldn’t have learned with him taking it easy on her.

“Red. I know you’re mad and probably not in the mood to talk, but I just want to let you know that I love you.” She hadn’t even moved, yet she laid him open with her perceptive words.

His voice was hoarse “I love you too sweetheart. I’m not mad. I just wish I could kill them all over again. Seeing how much her hurt you is surprisingly a much more effective torture than he could ever think of.”

Her voice was small, unsure “I’m sorry that you have to look at it. A constant reminder.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, ever.” His adamant reply helped her feel less conspicuous. Being ashamed of her body was an entirely new concept. One that was infinitely more damaging to her sense of self than she thought possible.

She sat in silence for a few more minutes and then decided to go flex and stretch her newly relaxed muscles by swimming a few laps. She knew how to swim, it had just been a while. It shouldn’t be too hard to accomplish.

She stood and turned towards Raymond, hoping that he would help steady her up the stairs and there he was, waiting with a towel.

She leaned in and gave him a quick kiss. “Thank you, I am feeling delightfully boneless and want to take advantage of that by stretching out in the pool. I only want to stay in a moment, do you mind?”

“Not at all. When you’re finished in the pool, we can head back up to the room, order room service, and relax the rest of the day. We can save sightseeing for tomorrow.”

She was glad that he wasn’t planning on anything else for today, she was getting tired, fast. “Sounds wonderful. Thank you.”

She tried to be as dignified as she could, but really wanted to jump into the pool. However, she remembered how much cannonballs hurt and her body wasn’t ready for that yet. She dipped a toe into the water and squealed a little bit at the temperature. It wasn’t that bad, it just felt like it compared to the heat of the hot tub.

She climbed down and swam a few laps. She thought she was closer to the edge than she really was and instead of grabbing it, she hit the water, which wouldn’t have been a problem if she weren’t at the deep end and taking a deep breath at the same time. She drew in water instead of air, choking her. The water, which she’d been careful to keep from her eyes was now stinging her eyes like acid.

She couldn’t breath and tried to scream, but nothing came out. She was too panicked to even try to stay afloat as her hands went to her eyes to stop the pain.

**Tbc…**


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angst and some steam.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am trying to keep up and had a spare moment. I thought that I’d get more time to write, but time had been surprisingly elusive. This one gets a little steamy. Next chapter will be way steamy...maybe. You guys are the best!

Raymond watched her sluice through the water and was astounded at how brave she was and so ready to try new things, experience everything she could. Her strokes through the water were graceful, slow and fluid.

He hoped she didn’t want to stay in long because she really needed to rest and recover.

He watched her every move. It didn’t take long before he could see that she was getting tired, starting to slow down. She was in the deep end when she started to flail around. He made it to the side of the room where she was in distress just as she slipped beneath the surface.

Suit and all, he dove in after her and brought her to the edge. He pushed her out of the water and on to the floor and crawled out after her. She wasn’t breathing, her chest jerking violently in an attempt to breathe, but with no success. He laid her on her side with one arm over her head and patted her on the back, but was getting no response. “Breathe sweetheart, come on, baby.”

He was getting desperate and started mouth to mouth. Nowadays, they tell you not to breathe into a person, but that is more for hygienic and safety reasons rather than efficiency. Two breaths later, she was sputtering and coughing up water. He was so relieved until she put her hands over her eyes and moaned “Oh, god, my eyes, they sting so badly.”

Knowing he had to get her to a fresh water source to flush her eyes, he scooper her up and carried her both of them sopping wet and dripping through the lobby of the most prestigious hotel in London and up to their room. People were probably giving them dirty looks, but they could all go to hell.

The bathroom sink was too shallow so he took her to the shower, turned the water on to the cool side of warm and detached the shower head to spray the stream across her eyes.

Her voice was a little raspy “Yes, that feels so much better. Holy hell, thank you Raymond. I think it was the chlorine. I haven’t come into contact with it since I was a small child. Maybe I’m allergic or something.”

He was holding her up under the spray, every inch of her body pressed to his and all he wanted to do was fall to his knees and thank a god he no longer believes in. She was shivering from the cool water. “Do your eyes feel better? Do you want to keep rinsing them out?”

“I’m…I think I’m ok now.” Except she wasn’t. Her voice was hoarse and she wasn’t looking at him. Her eyes were unfocused on a point above his head like she did when she was blind.

He scooped her up once again and laid her down on the bed. “Raymond, stop. At lease let me get this suit off first.”

She got up and tried messing with the ties. She would ruin it if he didn’t intervene “Here, let me help sweetheart. I don’t want the strings to get ruined.”

She snorted though it sounded heavy with tears “I thought you hated this suit. You refused to even look at me downstairs.”

He cleared his throat as she was once again naked in his arms. “That nothing to do with your attire. In fact, I didn’t look because I know exactly what the sight of you does to me and that’s not something we can even entertain while you’re still in so much pain. So it’s better if I don’t take in the view when I can’t actually partake of…well you.”

He held her and kissed her forehead as he breathed in her scent. She started unbuttoning his buttons, in an attempt to take his clothes off. He grabbed her hands and held her still. “I just want to feel you against me. To feel your heartbeat, you know? If it makes you feel any better, I um, I can’t see right now. I’m more than a little afraid and I just want you to hold me. Please, Raymond.”

He immediately let go and started taking his clothes off as fast as he could. To hell with his comfort, it was hers he was worried about. “Absolutely sweetheart, I totally understand. I’m so sorry you can’t see.” He paused in his quest to disrobe “I need to call a doctor for you. I can have one here within the hour. Alright?” He buttoned his shirt back up, but stopped again when she spoke.

“No thank you. There is literally nothing that a physician, even an eye doctor can tell me that I don’t already know. Nothing is certain. I may be able to see and I might not. It’s a waiting game to see. Right now I want, no need, you much more than I need answers.”

Once he was completely naked, he drew her into his arms and into the bed. He covered them in a cocoon of blankets. They were both shivering at first but they quickly warmed from their combined body heat.

“Lizzie, before we fall asleep, I’m going to go get you your pain meds. Do you mind if I give you a prescription strength one? Just this once to help you settle in.”

She yawned “Yes, please Raymond. I appreciate you thinking of that for me.”

She took the pills that he retrieved for her and left the remainder of the water on the bedside table for her to drink if she was thirsty.

He didn’t care if it was the middle of the day, they were both going to take a nap. This incident shook them both up more than they wanted to admit. Resting, instead of reliving the horror of Lizzie almost drowning, was just what they needed.

 

*****

 

Liz awoke to a soft breath causing her hair to tickle the side of her face. She opened her eyes and was so relieved to see. She could see! She looked around the suite and everything was still slightly blurry, but she was so elated that she started to cry, which woke Raymond immediately.

At her first body quaking, silent sob, he was alert “Sweetheart what’s wrong? Are you in pain?” He sat up so that he could look her over properly for whatever injury that was causing her to cry. “Is it your eyes? I need you to talk to me. Tell me what’s going on, please.”

She grabbed him and wrapped her arms around his neck and held him tight. “Nothing’s wrong. I’m sorry that I scared you, but I these are happy tears. I can see! I am so freaking happy!” The last sentence was more of a squeal that she punctuated by fusing her lips to his.

Sharing her joy, he responded immediately. He traced her lips with his tongue so she deepened the kiss. He was such a wonderful kisser she must have moaned out loud, because he broke away from her panting “I’m so sorry sweetheart, I forgot. You taste so damn good.”

She leaned in again for another kiss “I promise, I don’t hurt at all, the medicine is working wonders. Now shut up and kiss me.” She wanted more of the delicious sensations elicited with his kiss. His restrained passion made her ache to drive him mindless with passion.

To feel the strength that he couldn’t quite hide behind his refined clothing. To feel his elegant hands grip her a little too tightly.

She flushed with arousal from the very thought of wearing his mark. The bites and bruises from time well spent. She’d never seen the evidence of passion and right then, she wanted that more than she wanted to breathe.

She didn’t wait for him to make the first move and instead cupped his cheeks and brought his mouth back to hers. He protested “I can’t hurt you. Lizzie, I want you. Never doubt that. I see your body and it’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever laid eyes on. I would cut off my own arm before I would cause you even the slightest of pain. We can wait, it’s alright.”

She balled her hands into fists at his shoulders in frustration “I am hurting now. I ache for you. If I was in pain right now, I wouldn’t start this. I want you so badly, Raymond. Please touch me. I can’t wait to feel every inch of you on me, in me. I want you on top of me, then I want to ride you until you come deep inside of me. I want you behind me, cupping my breasts as you pound into me…I have a lifetime of fantasies that I want to experience with you. I’ve never felt this way about anyone and I need to feel this, to feel you. I am begging you to forget for a few minutes that I was hurt. I am not in pain and the only thing that will hurt me right now is if you turn me away.”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for sticking with the story and the reviews, messages, and Kudos! Let me know what you think!


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz and Red aren't speaking, but then both scheme to make the other one give in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being so amazing! Now, don’t be upset, but I had to split this chapter up. It was way too long and messed with my OCD because it would have been a double chapter. HOWEVER, I will post your absolute smut tomorrow morning, maybe even tonight. We’ll see how this one goes over.   
> Disclaimed, as always.

Liz knew that she was being immature, but she really didn’t give a damn. She wasn’t going to talk to Raymond until he gave in on his asinine idea of not touching her. At least that was the plan. She found him to be positively irresistible.

So she avoided him and clung to Red who didn’t quite understand that he wasn’t needed any longer. She took his ‘working’ harness off to let him know that he was off the clock and they played fetch often, but he was still at a loss. So she cuddled with him as much as possible to let him know that he didn’t do anything wrong. She figured she would mainly work with him on his security training so he wouldn’t be depressed from losing his sense of purpose.

It had been three days and she could feel the cracks beginning to form in her resolve. He looked perpetually sad and maybe a little disappointed, she was miserable. They were both suffering for her stubborn nature.

All because he loved her too much to hurt her more. She couldn’t help it. Her hormones were going crazy and he was doing nothing to help, walking around with his unflinching confidence in his three piece suits.

It was driving her insane.

It was most likely due to the increase in visual stimulation. She just wasn’t used to seeing an extremely attractive gentleman for whom she’d developed feelings for, day in and day out, with no relief in sight.

Oh, he was more than happy to take care of her sexual urges. Three nights ago, after she had begged him to take her, he’d kissed her softly and brushed his incredible fingers against her until she was crying out his name. But then afterwards, he kissed her on the forehead and held her until she fell asleep.

The next morning, she was furious and had imposed the silent treatment in protest after a heated argument. He said he wouldn’t risk hurting her, no matter how badly he wanted her.

One half of her loved him even more for his unwavering love and caring. The other half wanted to smack him for his stubborn decision.

Today was the day. She hadn’t had a pain in two days and the bruises were fading to a sickly greenish yellow color, but there was no help for that.

Today was the day that she was going to drive Raymond so crazy, he would break his iron control.

 

*****  


Today was the day. Red had thought of nothing but throwing Lizzie over his shoulder and kissing her stubborn, prideful mouth until she had no idea where she ended and he began. He couldn’t take it anymore.

He should be at least a little upset that she was being so bull-headed. However, his feelings were the exact opposite.

The impertinent lift in her chin when she attempted to pointedly ignore him was the most adorable thing he’d ever witnessed.

Her little sniffle of outrage when he’d state something outlandish to provoke a reaction, the way her mouth opened and closed when she so badly wanted to put him in his place. He loved every second of it.

How she spoke to Red and treated the canine as if he were the only other soul in the room. It made him want to grab her and kiss her senseless.

He undeniably missed their closeness. Her self-imposed silence had created a distance between them that he was going to remedy today.

He was sitting and reading the morning paper, drinking his morning coffee, when Lizzie walked in, naked as a jail bird.

He immediately choked on his drink, accidentally inhaling instead of swallowing. He sputtered and coughed to regain the breath he lost.

“Lizzie? Sweetheart, uh…you aren’t wearing any clothes.” He said when he finally got his breathing under control. He was painfully aroused and she’d only just walked into the room.

Her face was crestfallen, her bottom lip trembling, her voice low and rusty from lack of use “I’m sorry, I was just comfortable and forgot to put clothes on after I woke up. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, Raymond.”

He was so elated that she’d actually spoke to him that he was temporarily distracted from her magnificent body. That combined with the knowledge that she’d been naked all night, probably every night, made his arousal throb.

He had decided that he wasn’t going to fight it any more, he just wished that he’d planned better. She deserved the best, even though he was the opposite of that.

When he spoke, he made sure that his voice was gritty and low “On the contrary, I was just making sure you were comfortable. I certainly don’t mind the view. If you want to never wear clothes again, you’d hear no protest from me, sweetheart. At least in private.”

She chuckled “So you were just making sure I knew I was undressed? I am blind, well, was blind. That does not make me mentally deficient. But I suppose I’ll forgive you for that. I can’t tell you how many times over the years people have asked me stupidly redundant questions or felt the need to speak really loud as if I am deaf and blind.”

He was hurt that she lumped him in with the masses, but was more than happy to see her nipples pucker at either his words or the sound of his voice. He made sure to keep his voice low as he replied “And how is your sight? I’ve been curious, but since you’ve been…less than loquacious, I wanted to give you space. Which seems to have worked out rather well for me. I have always said that patience pays off. This is just a shining example of that creed.”

 

 

She laughed, overjoyed with his flirting. It had been so long “I feel that I should admit that I have less than honorable intentions today.”

His lips pursed, he chewed on the inside of his cheek “Yes please.”

“Raymond, what are you even saying yes to?”

He raked his gaze from her eyes all the way down to her toes and back up again so slowly she started to squirm under his penetrating gaze as it warmed her “Everything. Yes to everything.”

With a small smile she asked “No more holding out on me because you are afraid of hurting me?”

He stood and made his way around the table, his paper long forgotten “I am not going to be taking you up against any walls if that is what you are wondering. I will just have to be gentle.”

She nuzzled his neck so he tilted his head to the side to provide her with better access “What if I don’t want gentle?” She punctuated her questions by a rough nip below his ear that made him gasp and then moan when she didn’t let go right away.

He swayed closer to her “You play with fire. I’ve wanted you for too long to be teased.” His growl made her gasp in return. Wetness pooled between her legs as his rumbling voice reverberated throughout her body.

“I am ready Raymond. If you make me beg again, I swear on everything I will stab you.”

He chucked and brought her flush against his hips “Does it feel like I am holding out?” Despite his earlier statement, he backed her into the bare wall behind them, careful to not let her hit the wall too hard.

She bit her lip in excitement. She was finally getting everything she’d dreamed of for so long.

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don’t be mad that it’s not as smutty as promised, it was just too smutty and too long and I swear that you will get exactly as promised next chapter. It’s already done. I swear.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut. That is all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter and was so unhappy with it. It was pure smut/porn and didn’t fit with the tone of the story so I rewrote it. I generally don’t do that because it messes with my writing process, but it bothered me until I changed it. It’s still steamy, but I don’t think it’s downright dirty anymore. Maybe. No promises though. I am seriously unsure about this. If you have delicate sensibilities, I’m pretty sure they are about to be wrecked, so you may want to skip this…
> 
> Disclaimed, as always.

From there they stared into each other’s eyes, panting. He could see her love for him reflected through her gaze. Her arousal gave her eyes a catlike appearance that made the blood pound in his ears.

He tried to keep his head, he was all too aware that she was still hurt, but her smell, her body-it was overwhelming. So when he kissed her, he kissed like a man dying of thirst and she his only oasis.

She must have been just as lost to sensation as he was because her hands were in no way gentle. The knowledge that she was so aroused intoxicated him further. His head was fuzzy, their surroundings nothing but a fog as he concentrated only on her.

His one hand cradled the back of her head, the other gripped her waist. She grabbed the hand at her waist and brought it up to her breast. Their dual moans a symphony of need.

She pressed herself to him as he took her nipple between his fingers and drove her to madness. She undulated her hips into the hardness pressed against her. She growled as if frustrated and then brought her leg up around him so her warm, wet core cradled his cock.

His hands left their positions to cup her behind and lifted her to him. Both of her legs wrapped tightly around him and her entire weight settled on his hips.

She felt so magnificent that the instinct to buck against her took over, but he knew it would all be over entirely too soon if he didn’t slow down.

So he worked his way down her neck with his mouth, nipping at her clavicle on his journey to her breasts. Her skin smelled like cherries and tasted like heaven on earth.

She put one of her feet back on the floor to distance their bodies and unzip his pants. She gripped him and he almost lost himself right then “Lizzie, we need to go to bed, I don’t want to hurt you. You need-“  his words were cut off with a moan as she gripped him in her hand like a vice. She pumped him from base to the tip, where she rubbed his pre-cum up and down as lubricant.

His eyes nearly crossed as every thought but being inside of her left his head.

“I need you to fill me up. I love you and I absolutely want gentle from you, but not right now. Right now I want every part of my body to feel yours. I want to revel in the knowledge that you can’t control yourself around me. I’ve never felt this…powerful connection and I need it.”

She shoved his pants and boxer briefs down to rub the head of him against her clit. He swallowed her moan with a devouring kiss. She rubbed him over her until he could feel the uncontrollable twitches in her thighs.

He wanted to feel her throbbing around his cock when she came, but he was willing to take on the task of providing her with multiple orgasms. She proved that she felt the same when she interrupted his thoughts with “Now, Raymond, I want my first orgasm with you to be while you are inside of me.”

He could barely think, function. Usually he was able to remain distant enough to arouse his partner with words, but it was her that was driving him wild while he was mindless, unable to do little more than feel.

He ran his hands down her body gripped her behind again, maybe a little more firmly than he meant to, but her moan was all pleasure as he lifted her once again to place her legs around him.

But this time he positioned himself at her opening. His chest ached with how much he loved her. He wanted perfection and was more than a little worried that he would prove to be less than for her.

As the head of his cock slipped inside of her, her inner muscles became so tight that he could barely enter without fear of harming her. She was dripping with arousal, so that wasn’t the problem.

A thought struck him and he pulled back “Tell me you’ve done this before, Lizzie. Look at me.” He was terrified of the answer, so when it came, he sighed in relief.

“It’s been a while.”

He rested his forehead against hers “I don’t want to hurt you.”

She captured his lips with hers and murmured against them “Go slow…but just at first.”

He positioned himself at her entrance and this time she relaxed around him and he slipped inside with little resistance. Her sheath gripped him so tightly, he had to pause and concentrate on merely breathing.

He moaned against her mouth “I love you and I swear I’ll make this up to you later.”

He’d waited too long for this to last.

She didn’t get a chance to reply because then his hands were everywhere all at once, leaving her awash in so much sensation, she was terrified the pleasure would devour her.

He moved then, slowly at first, but quickly moved into a pounding rhythm that quickly had them both shouting out their releases.

When the euphoric haze receded, he realized where they were, what he had just done “Lizzie, hell. I’m so sorry, I didn’t hurt you did I?”

She laughed a pure feminine laugh of satisfaction. “If by hurt you mean a boneless puddle of orgasmic bliss, then sure, yeah, whatever.” Her head flopped back against the wall indelicately as if she could no longer even support its weight.

The absolute joy he felt that he could pleasure her so well made his cock twitch inside of her. Her gasp of pleasure made him laugh as his chest tightened with joy.

As he carried her to the bedroom, the stimulation of him moving inside of her with every step caused him to harden once again.

“What are you doing?” she asked as he laid her on the edge of the bed.

He traced her lips with his tongue “Making it up to you.”

He kept his thrusts slow and measured. His brow creased with his intense concentration on his movements.

Her gasps spurred him on as he pumped into her again and again. He brought his thumb down to rub circles around her clit and was instantly rewarded when her pussy tightened around him, a tight wet pulsating vice around him.

“I. Love. You. You feel so amazing inside of me. I can’t think, can’t breathe.” Her words made him more determined to show her how much she meant to him.

“I love you Lizzie. So much. I can’t lose you.” His mind wanted to think of all the things that could have taken her away from him. All of the things that still could.

She brought herself closer to him and ran her hands down his back and up underneath his shirt. When she encountered the marred skin of his scars, he froze. He forgot. How could he have been so stupid?

“Raymond, it’s ok, I’m right here and you will never lose me. I’m not bothered by them. Does it hurt when I touch them?”

Rivulets of sweat dripped down his temple as he hoarsely replied “No. They haven’t hurt in a long time. I have very little sensation there at all.”

In an attempt to keep her from asking questions, he moved again. Deep and sure inside of her. He propped her behind up to change the angle of his thrusts and went as deep as he could.

 

*****

 

She widened her hips as he changed the angle of his thrusts, taking him impossibly deep.

She threw her head back and came with abandon.

She finally opened her eyes when she noticed he had stopped his movements.

“What?” her whisper was soft, unsure.

“You are so damn beautiful. Soft and wild. Soft and Silky. I’ll never have enough of you.”

Feeling him so deeply inside of her was incredibly arousing. She swore she could feel him all the way to her belly button.

She had barely finished her orgasm when she felt the beginning burn of a new one. There was something about seeing the adoration, the desire in his eyes and hearing him tell her how beautiful he found her gave her an incredible ego boost.

“More” she demanded breathlessly.

He began to move harder, faster. The backs of her legs slapped against his thighs and shook her entire body with the force. It seemed he had run out of patience. Good. She wanted him just as wild and abandoned as she was.

His eyes glittered and clashed with hers, so full of emotion.

“Raymond, I’m close again, please come with me.”

He groaned “I’m there too.” He buried his head into her neck and came with a muffled shout.

She shattered like glass on concrete, it bordered on pain her muscles were strung so tight. But then she was weightless, euphoric. And all she could do was whisper his name.

 

 

 

“How old are your scars?” She couldn’t stop thinking about them. They were deep and wide-spread, evidence of pain and suffering that she hated thinking about. But she needed answers. Her spotted memories provided too little information.

“Nearly twenty-seven years old.” His voice was still deep, they lay spread out on the bed in identical poses on their backs.

Maybe their lack of eye-contact would increase the likelihood of him answering her question sans deflection.

“We’ve met before, haven’t we? That day at the café was not the first time you’ve been in my life, was it?” she asked and voiced the suspicion she’d harbored since the day she’d figured out who he was.

He cleared his throat “The answers aren’t that simple. But I can feel you tensing up. Neither of those factors have any bearing whatsoever on what we have. On my love for you.”

Apprehension made her snap “Just answer the question!”

He audibly swallowed, causing her to brace herself for the worst.

“Yes Lizzie, we’ve met before that day in the café.”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth comes out and breaks them both.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, I need to thank you for the truly wonderful responses I’ve received. But now, I need to apologize. I am so sorry. I know you don’t understand right this second, but in a few minutes you will. Angst x 1000 straight ahead.
> 
> Disclaimed, as always.

Her hands curled into fists, her nails dug into her palms in an effort to utilize the pain and remain calm. She would never get her answers by screaming like a lunatic. She felt used and betrayed.

He’d staged everything.

She didn’t doubt the sincerity of his feelings. Her eyes were clenched tightly shut, but she didn’t need to see to hear and feel the depth of his caring. He very well may love her.

It just wasn’t enough.

“Did you orchestrate your entrance into my life?” her whisper was dripping with rage, fear.

He paused, sucked in a breath “Which time?”

Her world was a flat line on a screen, her chest surely had a gaping hole through the middle of it. The tears she’d been too furious to cry nearly overflowed at his words. How she longed for him to lie to her, to tell her that he’d never met her before.

“Why don’t you just start with this time and then work your way back.”

Grief wove through his words like a funeral tapestry “I am going to tell you everything. I will admit that some details were…omitted, but I have never lied to you and never will. I love you. We met when you were four years old. We were the only survivors of an accident, a fire. I am the one who took you to Sam. He was a wonderful man who turned into a magnificent father. I was so…unsafe and everyone around me was dying. I couldn’t let happen to you what had already happened to them. So I moved heaven and earth to ensure that there was no connection, nothing to link us together.                                                          So I went to ground to begin my new life as a criminal. Sam was such an old and trusted friend that I was never worried about your welfare, so I just had periodic, impersonal updates on your status intermittently through the years. I never knew you were taken and blinded. If I had, I would have come for you then…You and I have overcome so much, it would have been an unbearable waste were your indomitable spirit be snuffed out.

“Although I suppose that had I known you as a teen, the interpersonal lines that have become blurred would have never had an opportunity to delineate. And we most certainly would not have become lovers. But as you know, I needed you and your connections with the FBI to hunt down criminals on my list. I was…unprepared by your strength and determination. I have never felt for another what I feel, right now for you.

“I know you are hurting right now, and thinking of you in pain is like a knife to my chest. I made myself available to you because you became a known entity to my enemies. One that was rightfully perceived as a weakness. Know that you may chose at any time to part company with me, that will always be your choice. However, you will be forever provided with security measures. That is nonnegotiable for as long as you are alive. My heart is literally outside of my chest. You are an exposed weakness that can be easily exploited.”

She took in every syllable of his words as the tears splashed on the sheet below her. She had so many questions, but his last sentence made her pause “I am easily exploited because I am weak? You spout nonsense about my supposed strengths when in reality you feel like I am easy pickings for any criminal to pick off like an apple from a tree. I am no longer the blind liability I once was, you should be comforted by that…Is everything about us a lie? Are you even capable of caring for anything but your own agenda?”

She wanted to vomit at the venom behind her words fueled by hurt and unadulterated pain. She wanted to erase them from the sands of time, pretend that she hadn’t lashed out so horrifically but she needed answers.

Brave man that he was, he ignored the gaping wound in his soul she’d just inflicted and reached between them and hooked his pinkie into hers to comfort her and whispered “No, not because you are weak, but because I would burn down the world for you I would easily trade anything and everything in exchange for your safety, no matter who was hurt in the process, even me.”

She sniffled as a flash from the past assaulted her “Burn…your burns. Did you receive them the night of the fire?”

His voice was broken and gravelly “Yes.”

A sudden thought horrified her, made her breath hitch, her voice became small “Did you get hurt trying to protect me? Am I the reason you burned? How did you know me?”

Her unease seemed to make it easier for him to strengthen his voice. “You were not the cause. You saved me. Do you understand? I would be dead if it weren’t for you. You saved my life twice in one night at four years old. Do you realize how extraordinary that makes you? _I_ was indebted to _you_ , certainly not the reverse.”

His mouth jogged opened and closed as she looked at him out of the corner of her eye, as if he wanted to say more. Or perhaps take back a statement he’d already let loose.

His words brought forth so many snippets of fighting, images of fire and heat and death that she had trouble processing it all. She could smell the smoke. Felt the recoil of a weapon in her hand.

A gun.

She fired a gun. She tried so hard to recall the person that she’d shot or how she even had access to a gun if she was only four years old.

But like dominoes on a hill, the bricks holding her memories at bay toppled one by one until she was left with a history that left her raw and bleeding inside.

“I remember. I remember everything.”

She felt him draw in a shuddering breath and finally looked at him, really concentrated on him for the first time since she felt his betrayal like a branding iron across her heart.

He was devastated, wrecked and left for dead, a lost shell of the man she’d come to love so well.

He wasn’t crying, there were no tears making a journey down his face. But the grief, the absolute loss was present in every pore, every plane of his face. She was Vesuvius to his Pompeii, and she had demolished his entire world with no warning.

She wished that she could find even a twinge of remorse inside of her, but she couldn’t. And what the hell kind of person did that make her, to skin a man alive and leave him broken and bleeding.

Only she wasn’t that kind of person. She wanted to hold on to her anger and confusion, but it would neither gain her answers nor heal the hurt that was slowly killing them both. This wound had to be lanced, the infection cut out, if they were ever to hold on to a hope for recovery.

She loved this man more than her next breath.

She had just remembered that she shot and killed her own father at the tender age of four and all she could think about was how could she make this man whole again?

Unfortunately, this bell could not be un-rung. Oh how she wished she could take it all back.

“I need-“ Her voice broke as her tears turned into sobs that racked her body to the very core.

She knew that she had to pull her shit together and make this right, but he would never believe that she forgave him if she was crying.

She needed to convey that her tears were not caused by any of his actions, but by her actions, what she had just done.

“Raymond, I need…I remember everything and I am so fucking sorry. I need to fix this….this entire mess. I know you. I have done nothing but listen and witness your sincerity for months. I may not have been able to see you, but you have shown me more about love and caring than anyone has in my entire life. I love you and I am so damn sorry that my hurt pride cause such trash to leave my mouth.”

He moved closer to her “You are not going to leave me? You remember everything and aren’t washing your hands of me?”

Hope was a present beacon in the dark, a light that shone upon them both in that moment.

“I remember that I killed a man, my father, when he was hurting my mother. But then she left. I remember that I saw a man on the floor and knew that everything was so hot it made my toys melt. I remember thinking he would melt and I would be alone. I couldn’t let that happen. I remember smacking his face until he jerked with alarm, took one look around and grabbed me to run out of the house. I don’t know why you were in my house that night. But I do know that I love you with everything I am and that no matter what happened or will happen in the future, we will find a way to overcome all of it”

They were facing each other, but she’d been so absorbed in the past that she had forgotten that they were still naked.

His body was throwing heat like a furnace and hers felt like it was icing over from the cold from the inside out. Until she had confirmation that they were fine, she didn’t think she’d ever feel warm again.

She looked into his face, his eyes that finally showed the slow track of one solitary drop that fell from the inside corner of his eye, down the side of his nose, and finally around the contour of his mouth where he chewed on the inside of his cheek.

The knowledge that what he was about to say was worse than the revelations he’d just stated had her tensing once again. As if she could physically protect herself from the psychological blow.

There was no hesitation, but his voice was low, full of remorse “Lizzie, I was inside of your house that night because I was ordered to kill you.”

 

**Tbc…**


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More revelations...and some smut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is officially the longest fic I have ever written! I am slightly terrified, but also feel like I’ve made this huge accomplishment,lol. Silly, right? Anyways, thank you so much for supporting this fic with the follows/reviews/favorites. 
> 
> It’s important that Lizzington shows a strong presence to increase awareness and relevance. We need to show a united front in order to support our ship!
> 
> Disclaimed- I own nothing and make no money off of this.

His words, his declaration should have hurt more than it did. Not everyone hears that they were to be murdered at the age of four.

She drew in a shuddering breath “Well, you obviously changed your mind, but I think we need to talk about things from your point of view. Logically, as I was only four, I am an unreliable source of information. Maybe your story can put the pieces of my story back together.”

She moved closer to him and grabbed his hand. His head snapped up in surprise at her touch. His face, so full of sorrow, was morphing into what she thought was hope.

He cleared his throat repeatedly to cover up the fact that he was holding back tears “I was part of a team sent to teach your father a lesson. He’d stolen property from his superiors. Actually, it was in his possession because he’d been ordered to steal it. Anyways, I was to light a fire in the back of the house. I was told that no one was home but your father, but it turns out that I was also to be taught a lesson that night. I was too honest and asked too many questions. You father knew all about me and had a hit put out on me.

Another man on my team, a man you know as Anslo Garrick was sent to kill everyone in the house, but had been a mole planted by your father. But when we got there, your parents were fighting and we could hear them nearly to the streets. Your mother was going to take you and leave him. She had no desire to be put into danger by his criminal activities.

I was just going to wait until she left, presumably with you, but when we heard the shots, we rushed in. You were holding a gun and by the time I had talked the weapon away from you, Anslo had already killed your mother. When I realized what was happening, I hid you away. I turned around, only to be hit across the head. The next I woke up, your little hand was smacking me across the face.”

He chuckled “The entire house was engulfed in flames and you woke me up. You saved me. You helped me through the flames and were a guide to the little used side entrance that wasn’t entirely aflame yet. The old wood floor gave out and I tripped. I almost took you down with me. My coat caught fire and I couldn’t quite get it off in time before the flames reached my skin.”

He smiled “You won’t catch me dead in rayon or a cotton poly blend ever again. Thus the suits. Silk and wool are much less combustible.”

She knew he tried to make light of the situation. For her. How could she not love him?

“Oh, I wouldn’t say the suits are less combustible. More so, in my opinion.”

He laughed and held her close, kissed the top of her head. His relief was a tangible thing. He was still trembling from his worry though. So was she if she was honest with herself.

“What about my father, Anslo Garrick said that he worked for my father. I remember shooting him. How can he be alive?”

Raymond sighed “I wish I knew that he was one hundred percent dead. I know that you shot him. Did I confirm it? No. I was focused on you. You were the only innocent in the whole damn place. As soon as my team showed up I could feel that something wasn’t quite right. He very well could be alive, but I’ve been through nearly every criminal circle in the world and I would have recognized him. Unless he’s had work done or is still a fairly small fish, I would have had to come into contact with him over the years. My money is on him having work done.”

She clenched her eyes shut as memories of her father assaulted her “I wish I would have killed him. He was a monster.”

His arms tightened around her “If he is not dead, I am glad that his death is no longer on your soul. I will hunt him to the ends of the earth. He will never get his hands on you and I will put him in the ground for hurting you.”

His voice was low and deadly. She shivered, but it certainly not in fear.

Of all of the answers she’d received this night, he was forefront in her mind, still.

He would kill for her, die for her. And she couldn’t help but be glad that he felt the same pull, the same necessity that she felt when she thought of him. He was everything to her and she would do whatever it took to keep him safe and by her side.

 

*****

 

Neither of them could bring themselves to get dressed, they just held each other and talked quietly about what their plans for the future held. She was ready to resume their travels. He was ready to start an international man-hunt for her father.

He gave in, but he would be placing a few phone calls and would have a location by the end of the week. There was no way that he wasn’t going to use the full force of his resources to make sure that Lizzie stayed out of danger.

They were both exhausted, both mentally and physically. They slept off and on. He would have done anything to keep her from the knowledge that she shot her father.

He tried to keep his distance from her, tried not to smother her with affection. But the truth was, he was so damned relieved that she was even speaking to him, let alone still open to a relationship with him.

He couldn’t stop himself from rubbing her am as he held her. He ran his hand through her hair as he brushed it away from her face. He breathed in her scent of cherries mixed in with his aftershave.

It was slightly intoxicating and made him impossibly hard. But he would ignore that problem indefinitely, if need be. Lizzie absolutely needed to be the one to make the first move to continue their intimacy.

So it shouldn’t have been a surprise when he was woken with her hand on his cock, pumping him from root to tip, spreading the moisture weeping from him to ease the friction of her grip.

“Holy hell, sweetheart. You can wake me up like this anytime.” His voice always low, was husky and strained with arousal.

Lizzie climbed over him, straddled him between her muscular thighs. He held her face and pushed her hair behind her ears tenderly. “Are you sure?”

The moisture from her core coated his shaft as she slid up and down the length of him. He ran his hands everywhere, cherishing the connection. She positioned him at her entrance and whispered “Always” as she slid down the length of him, taking him fully inside of her.

She rose up and over him, so high that he nearly slid out, but she kept her seat atop him.

Again and again she repeated the action and he couldn’t help but reach up and cup her breasts and tease her nipples. Her walls tightened impossibly around him and he knew she was close.

He was thankful, because she felt so magnificent he wouldn’t last much longer “Let go, Lizzie.”

She stubbornly shook her head “I want this to last forever”

He nearly laughed “I won’t last forever. I need to feel you come around me.”

Well two could play that game.

He reached between their bodies and brushed her clit with his thumb, all while pinching lightly at her nipple. Her inner muscles clamped down around him so tight, her keening cry so arousing, he couldn’t hold back.

He followed her into paradise, shouting her name.

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two more chapters left. Let me know what you think!


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red and Liz begin their travels but quickly run into trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sweet baby Jesus. I don’t know if I can do this one justice. I’ve been in the action/torture writing groove so I hope that I can find the fluff and love for this. 
> 
> Turns out I couldn’t but there’s only one more chapter and the epilogue. A big mystery needed solving and I couldn’t do it peacefully. 
> 
> Disclaimed, I own nothing and make zero profit.

Dubai. They ended up in Dubai. Red was determined to show her the sights and pamper her ceaselessly. On the way here, they stopped by Egypt to see the pyramids. They didn’t stay long because of the political unrest and quickly moved on to the United Arab Emirates.

“Not that I am complaining. I had no idea that one could spend not only an entire day at the spa, but three days in a row. I’ve been so waxed, buffed, and polished that I probably shine. You’ll need sunglasses to look at me. And the architecture, I had no idea that buildings looked like this.”

She had been taking Red along less and less. It was hard using a service dog when you weren’t blind. Businesses tended to frown on such behavior, so Red was back at the hotel, which had a dog day care. Dubai certainly catered to the rich.

Raymond put his arm around her and kissed her temple as they strolled into their next destination of the Botanical Conservatory. It was an enormous complex.

“Why did you pick Dubai, Raymond? I love how crazy interesting it is, it just seems so…artificial. Like I’m watching a movie. Of all the places, why this?”

His smile was so happy. Since they had worked through their issues and her memories, their bliss was unparalleled. There was still the mystery of her father, but Raymond had put his team on it and their security team had been increased. He was nothing if not committed to her safety.

“Lizzie, this town is a perfect representation of the entire modern world. It progression so rapid, that it is unsustainable and slowly destroying itself. And the Sheik owes me money. I acquired a particularly rare artifact for him and he insisted I pick up my payment in person. Since I am unwilling to leave you alone and the thirty-two million he owes me may come in handy in our travels, here we are. We are here, and there are sights to see. Once we are done with this artificial Christmas tree of a city, we’ll go on to the real beauty of the world.”

Thirty-two million dollars was more money than she could fathom. Yeah, she would have stopped too.

The Conservatory was ‘two football fields of sweltering jungle’ and ‘absolute hell for more than a few hours’ as Raymond described. She laughed but he just replied “I think you should see the jungle, it’s a beautiful place. I’m certainly not taking you to the real jungle. It’s a death trap. I was once stuck in the Amazon for six days. It was like Jumanji, but without the daddy issues. Everything there is just looking for an opportunity to kill you. So no, the closest we will be getting to the Rainforest is a stay in a five star hotel during Carnival in Rio.”

He kissed her on the nose and continued on the beautiful pathway that looked like it belonged in a fairy tale.

She peeked furtively under her lashes at him, admiring the view. Her sight was progressively better, making her the most joyous human being in existence. Raymond provided her with twenty-four-seven

Watching Raymond, his gestures, his mannerisms, was a unique experience that she would never tire of.

The story he just told was full of hand movements that made her lick her lips and yearn to feel them on her body.

She must not have been as covert as she’d hoped because he smiled and growled “There’s too many people surrounding us or you’d definitely find yourself half naked with me inside of you amongst the foliage.”

Shivers ran down her spine and she giggled to cover her reaction “Stop Red, everyone will hear you and then follow us around like criminals to make sure you aren’t spontaneously bending me over a boulder in the waterfall room.”

Raymond’s laughter boomed in the cavernous space.

She was too happy for words and hoped that he felt the same. She wanted to spend the rest of her life making him laugh just like that.

 

*****

 

They were wandering through a particularly beautiful display that was teeming with millions of butterflies when Raymond received a call. She couldn’t quite hear what was being said on the other lone, but Raymond tensed so she knew it couldn’t be good.

He hung up after a “Thank you. Side Exit, get there now.”

He grabbed her arm and walked faster through display after display “What’s wrong?”

He never stopped but spoke “It’s a trap, that’s what’s wrong. There’s rats in the dessert and they’ve showed their cards. They’re here. When I tell you to, go find the ‘Walking Palm’ tree exhibit. In the corner along edge of the wall directly to your left as you enter is an emergency exit. My people will be waiting for you.”

“Wait. What? What is a walking palm? How will I know, I’ve been blind for the past decade and a half? Everything is in Arabic!” She was panicking, her voice rose with her fear. She did not want to be separated from him.

He pulled her to him and crushed his lips to hers “Trees that look like they can walk, sweetheart. Find the trees with legs and you’ll find safety. I love you”

He took a gun out of his lower back and a silencer out of his pocket and started screwing it on. “Go, I’ve got this. I’ll make sure you’re safe.”

Her chin lifted defiantly “Glad to hear that. We should go then. Because I’m not moving unless you are coming with me.” He swore under his breath “Fine then, let’s move.”

He was livid at her stubbornness. They rushed, hand in hand until they reached the room that he had referred to. The massive trees were beautiful, and aptly named. They looked as if they had sprouted legs and would walk off at any moment.

The click of a gun from behind stopped them. Raymond slowly turned his body in the direction of the sound and positioned his body in front of hers. She backed into the wall, determined to not be a distraction or a liability.

A group of three men, all covered in tattoos, stood before them. Something about the oldest one in the middle was very familiar.

_Her father_. She had to think fast or they were dead. She didn’t believe that Raymond would hesitate to step in front of a bullet or draw their fire in order to save her.

From their talks surrounding the night of the fire and their mutual pasts, she had finally figured out the remaining pieces of the puzzle.

Raymond would be furious, but there was no other way to save him.

She moved around him, nearing his side while he held out an arm to try and hold her back.

“Hello father.”

He smiled, not unattractive in his advanced years, but there was something about him that made her skin crawl.

“Hello Masha. Aren’t you going to come to daddy and welcome him properly? Why the look of surprise Red, you were looking for me weren’t you?” Oh. It was the evil that bubbled at the surface, permeated his every pore.

“No need. I have what you want. But I want to make a deal.”

Raymond looked at her incredulously “Shut up” he mumbled under his breath.

When her father turned to loot at him she spoke up again “Don’t worry about him. He’s a non-entity. I have the blackmail files and the only way you’re going to get them is if you let him walk out that door over there.” She gestured to the emergency exit hidden among the foliage.

She knew that Raymond was probably dying inside, but she was operating under the assumption that her father wouldn’t actually harm her until he had the fulcrum in hand. And a lot could happen to him between there and the states.

Was she really contemplating killing her father, for good this time? She looked at Raymond as he mouthed an emphatic “No” to her and decided that yes, she would absolutely murder her own flesh and blood to keep him safe.

He spoke up “You don’t want her Rostova.” She could almost see the gears in his head turning frantically for a way to save her. But in the end, she was right. There was no other way.

“We can go out the way you came if you will give me a minute to say good-bye.” She hoped she didn’t sound as desperate, as needy as she felt on the inside.

“Fine. Two minutes.” He snapped, and walked away to the entrance of the next exhibit.

She stepped close to Raymond, giving her father and his men her back. She trusted Raymond to keep an eye on her. “What in the hell do you think you are doing. That man will kill you as soon as he gets what he wants. Why are you trusting him?”

Tears sprang to her eyes “I’m not trusting him. I’m trusting you. I’m leading him back to where it all began. I know you’ll come for me. I love you and you may have enough bullets, but I won’t chance you like that. I’m safe for now. He needs me to get him the fulcrum. I’ll be fine.”

She kissed him ok the cheek and backed away before he could grab her and ruin everything.

“Go.” Red backed towards the exit, but chewed on the inside of his cheek and stared her down. None of the love he felt was reflected in his eyes.

She knew he was furious, but also unwilling to give her Father’s men a reason to harm her.

_‘I love you’_ she mouthed before turning her back on him and allowed her Father’s men lead her away.

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for your support! You guys are the best!
> 
> Let me know what you think!


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red rescues Lizzie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry it took so long to update!

“You are so much more beautiful than your mother, you know? It makes me… joyous just thinking about it.” Her father whispered in her ear as the slowly made their way through the exhibits towards the entrance. Like they hadn’t a care in the world.

He was vile and she wasn’t leaving this facility with him. Had never planned to. All she needed to accomplish was getting the gun of the goon on her right. It was an automatic.

She really only planned far enough ahead to save Raymond and try to get away.

_The waterfall room._ It was perfect. Tons of rock coverage, water to mask sounds, and uneven ground to help set the stage. She just hoped that the rocks weren’t fake, or it would never work. She needed them to stop bullets.

 

When they entered the waterfall room, she slowed her gait, acted as if she were afraid of the slippery rocks that made up the path.

Her father kept walking, but his henchman slowed. She wanted to smile but thought it was a bit premature.

It was a few more steps to the first set of tall rocks. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and thought of Raymond and thought of not only how much she loved him, but how much he loved her. If she died, he would be adrift, lost at sea without an anchor.

Before she could doubt herself, she moved.

The guard tried to catch her as she fell. She grabbed on to his neck for support.

She made herself a dead weight, he stumbled. She wrenched the gun away and fired three bullets into his gut before he realized her intent.

She fired in her father’s general direction as she dove behind the nearest group of rocks for cover.

He laughed “You missed girl, your aim hasn’t improved one bit. You’d think the Feds would’ve tried to teach you better. See? You need me! I can help you and you can help me.”

Two shots, much louder, fired. They were from a different gun. A bigger gun. She hoped like hell one of them didn’t have a rifle hiding somewhere or she was dead.

The sudden silence was deafening. The only sound she could hear was the pounding heartbeat in her ears. She didn’t dare look to see what was going on. The silence was probably a trap.

She clenched her teeth and her eyes shut to concentrate and combat her fear. If she didn’t control her breathing, she’d pass out.

“Excuse me, miss? Do you mind if I sit here? All the other seats seem to be taken up by dead bodies?”

*****

 

The second that Red went out the emergency exit he had a plan. He slipped a card in between the latch and the catch of the door-jam to prevent it from locking. His men were waiting for him. There were only four, but that would have to be enough.

If he didn’t get Lizzie away from that madman, she wouldn’t live out the day.

He grabbed a rifle from one of his men and led the way back inside.

At the first sound of shots, he ran as fast as he could. He trusted the team to watch his six because right now, he had only one priority.

He stopped and peeked around the corner from the direction in which the shots were fired. He didn’t blink, didn’t hesitate.

Lizzie was crouched behind a boulder and Rostova and his man were closing in on her. He readied the rifle and aimed, taking out Rostova with a single bullet to the brain. Seconds later, the only man left standing met the same fate. He lowered the weapon and rushed to Lizzie’s side.

He did slow when he realized she wasn’t bleeding or seriously injured. A gun was clutched in front of her like a shield. Her chest was heaving.

He was so relieved to find her alive and unharmed that he was giddy. She didn’t even open her eyes and he was standing only a meter away. He couldn’t help but think that the darkness was probably comforting to her.

He kept his tone light to keep himself from grabbing her and kissing her senseless. He was still furious that she traded herself for his safety.

“Excuse me, miss? Do you mind if I sit here? All the other seats seem to be taken up by dead bodies.”

Her eyes snapped open, made contact with his. ”Raymond?”

She scrambled of the floor and threw herself into him with a shout of happiness. He grunted as the gun dug into his ribs between them. “Oh shit, Sorry!” She laid the gun on the rocks and hugged him again. “I forgot I was holding it. Do over?”

His voice was hoarse with emotion. “I love you so much. I heard the shots and I was afraid I wouldn’t get to you in time. I figured you’d try something, thinking you could take them all on yourself. You could have been killed. And trading yourself for me? I don’t believe I need to tell you that you must never do that again!”

He shook her to punctuate his words and immediately felt horrible. Happy was too placid of an emotion to describe what he was feeling as he held her. He wanted this moment to last forever, but they needed to leave.

“I would love nothing more than to stand here and hold you all day, but I’m afraid we really must leave. I was sold out and I have a ruler to take care of.”  

She let him lead her towards the emergency exit where more of his security was presumably waiting, but not without protest. “Don’t think that you can leave me alone on some godforsaken island in post-orgasmic bliss, just so you can start a war with some oil baron. If you are going, I’m coming too. Do you hear me? Are you ignoring me?” She didn’t care that she sounded like a nag. She knew exactly what he was thinking of doing.

He let her outside into the sunshine, but he didn’t look mad. In fact, he looked a little too happy for a man who was supposed to be getting chewed out. He laughed. Laughed! And then he sighed with mock annoyance, still grinning “We’re not even married yet and you’re going to stop all my fun?”

His words caused the adrenaline already coursing through her veins to morph into a warmth that made her giddy. “Married? You’re a stubborn ass that doesn’t even say thank you when someone saves their life. Because I did. You would have tried to fight and would have ended up dead. I couldn’t let that happen.”

He swallowed, his tongue working in his mouth as he mulled over his next words, his hand at her back as he helped her into a waiting vehicle. He entered the other side, his mouth set, determined. “Lizzie, you fail to understand that I know _exactly_ what kind of monster that man was and I was ready to do anything to keep you from that, no matter what the consequences. I knew that you were to be kept safe because he had a use for you. You underestimate how far I will go to keep you safe. You think I am a good man, maybe slightly damaged, but I may as well lay my cards on the table right now. Everything and everyone is collateral damage when it comes to you. I don’t want you to be frightened, but I love you. I have never lied to you and I am not going to start now.”

She was used to the sweet and caring Raymond. This was Red Reddington, Concierge of Crime, staking a claim and declaring his love. He looked at her, waiting for a response, but she remained silent.

Oh, no. He was too intense, too hard. He had to think of a way to back track, to maybe sound less…obsessive is probably the term though he’d never say it out loud…no matter how true it may be.

“Does this vehicle have a privacy screen?” She spoke and he was sure that he felt more trepidation than he’d felt since waiting for punishment from his third grade teacher. He was a wife-beater and everyone in town knew it, they just turned a blind eye. But not him, he made his life hell, tripping him, tacks on his chair, he even went so far as gluing the man’s hands to a table.

“Yes.” He replied, nodding to the driver who immediately put the divider in place.

He sighed, Lizzie was looking out her window when she spoke, her expression and demeanor stoic. No hint of happiness, or even disdain at his impassioned speech. No matter the outcome, the fact that she could actually _see_ as she looked into the distance made it all well worth it. At least some good came from his presence in her life. Not much, but she now had the freedom to live how she wanted. He would provide her with an anonymous income to enable her to travel the world if she so chose.

But then she was in his lap and kissing his neck, his chin, his lips. Her mouth was everywhere. His arousal was immediate, no matter what games she seemed to play. “Lizzie, what are you doing?”

She bit his neck and his cock strained against the confines of his pants. “Shut up Raymond. I let you speak, but now it’s my turn, alright? Good.” She didn’t even give him a chance to reply. In between her words were kisses. Her hand snaked down to squeeze him and he hissed in a breath and jerked as if branded. She was killing him.

As she spoke, she slid down his body, settling in between his legs “I love you. I would like to be able to say that I am horrified by how far you are willing to go to protect me, but I can’t. I just don’t think I’m that good of a person. To be loved like that…that’s heady stuff and I have never been more turned on I don’t think. I need you to answer two questions for me. Short answers will be rewarded. Is this soundproof and how long are we going to be in this vehicle?”

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Confrontation with the Sheik and Liz meets a new side of Raymond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So um…yeah. Smut warning head. SMUT WARNING AHEAD. Seriously. Turn back if that’s not your thing. Just skip this entire smutty mess of a chapter. I am running and hiding as of this moment. It's not really as bad as I though tiit would be, but next chapter, the final(maybe) chapter will most definitely be.  
> Disclaimed, as always.

Raymond Red Reddington was speechless, once again by this mere slip of a woman. He had seen things, hell even done things, which would make a lesser man wet himself and he always had a quip, something to diffuse the situation with the expertise of an explosives expert. His mouth had talked him out of countless life or death situation, yet here he sat, unable to spit of someone yelled fire.

Lizzie, his love, his life, was currently unzipping his pants and trying to get them unbuttoned. _What had she asked him??_ Oh yeah, time and sound. “Uh…Soundproof, yes. Time..oh, length… _fuck, Lizzie…_ half hour.” He had no words. Because her hot little mouth was doing delightfully wicked things to him.

He tried to keep his hands gentle on her as he pushed the length of her hair from her face so that he could see her. There was no sight more beautiful than her mouth stretched around him. She was taking him so deep. She alternated between sucking on the tip and then taking him to the back of her throat.

He felt the brush of her teeth on the overly sensitive head and almost embarrassed himself by coming right then and there.

The further down the rabbit hole he went, the more he forgot to be gentle. His neck snapped back and his head hit the back of the seat with a groan from him. He looked at her and saw her cheeks pink with passion, her nostrils flared with her labored breaths. His hand was wrapped tight around her hair as he powered into her.

He let go immediately “Shit, sweetheart, I’m sorry. You make me forget myself. You need to stop or I’m going to come. We need to wait, I want to make sure I can give as good as I get. I won’t take the chance of someone seeing you, because then I’d have to kill them and we still may need them before we leave the country.”

Her dimpled grin was breathtaking “How about you shut up and come now and then give me a good seeing to later, I’ll even keep a tally of my orgasms to make sure you don’t slack off.”

She winked at him and then went right back to work worshipping his cock, teasing him to madness.

If the partition wasn’t soundproof, then his driver now knew that although Lizzie may be kneeling at his feet, it was he that was brought to his knees by her touch.

 

*****

At their destination, Liz looked around and it was a high rise, well, sky scraper, like all the rest. The architecture was unique and beautiful like most of the buildings in Dubai, but there were men with machine guns standing at the entrance to this one.

“We’re not leaving?” she inquired?

“As much as I’d like to get on the jet and leave, I need to make sure there’s no bad blood with the Sheik. I don’t feel like having my shiny new jet shot down by some glorified desert yuppy. Stay here.”

She smirked “You don’t actually believe that will work, do you? Because I don’t think you want to know what kind of dust I will kick up if you leave me out here.”

His sigh was long suffering “I know, Lizzie. I know. I have no doubts that you’ll prove adept at raising hell.” So he exited the truck and held out his arm to help her out.

She knew him and how protective he was of her, so him acquiescing to her demand at all meant that there must not be too much danger.

The building was all metal beams and panes of glass, not a touch of warmth. Oh it was decorated with a few paintings and plants, but nothing that would lead her to believe that this was a home. So a business office perhaps?

“Red, I can explain.” A man rushed around the corner with about four other people following him, frantically trying to keep up.

She looked to Raymond to see his reaction. He just offered a benign smile and replied “You have two minutes.”

Liz assumed that the man before them was the Sheik, but he looked like a normal business man, so who knew.

“Raymond, he came to me. I had already scheduled our meeting to give you the money I owe you.” He nodded to the woman behind him, also clad in business attire. “I didn’t betray you. I helped you. I gave you an opportunity to face and confront an enemy.”

Raymond’s tongue worked and turned over in his cheek as he pondered his answer. “You endangered my associate here and the last person to commit such a grievous act of disrespect found themselves turned into a bobble head if you catch my drift. Ginger here _hates_ to almost die. I’m not even that angry, it’s her I worry about.”

Honestly, if she wasn’t trying so hard not to laugh she would have remembered to wear an appropriately fierce expression. But because she had no idea what in the hell Red was getting at and he must have noticed, Red spoke again.

“She may look like a nice, corn-fed, all American homecoming queen, but I have seen her positively bathed in the blood of her kills. It was pure poetry, I assure you. I’ll tell you what, because we go back so far, I’ll tell Ginger here to let this slide.” The joviality dropped from his tone and became pure menace “Because if you betray me again, your mother will cry when she sees what’s been done to you.

By the end of his speech, she was more composed. Although the sound of his voice sent shivers down to the base of her spine. But not in fear.

No, she wanted him to lick the trail of shivers that his voice caused. And then lick her everywhere else.

She had eyes only for Raymond. More words were exchanged, the money verified and in their possession. Throughout it all, her eyes never left him.

He had to have known, but he pointedly refused to look her way.

They left and made it safely to the airport without a word. She had no idea what he was mad about, but she wasn’t going to open her mouth and find out. It was probably her poor acting skills.

“Lizzie, when we get on that jet, we are going to disappear. Never to be heard from again. Is that ok with you?”

He was so serious. His gaze was pointed off to the distance on some unseen object.

She really meant her voice to be stronger, but all that came out was a whisper “I just want to be with you. Forever. That’s all I want.”

His nostrils flared and he took a deep, shuddering breath as if to calm himself.

He didn’t answer, just stepped out of the vehicle and came around to her side and opened the door for her. He left the suitcase for his men to care for and led her up the stairs.

She did so love the jet. She wasn’t a fan of flying in general, but there was something to be said about flying in luxury.

But Raymond didn’t escort her to the plush leather seats with kneading massage backs. He nodded to the captain and left his men to deal with everything else. His hand a delightful pressure and warmth on her back, he led her to the bedroom.

The second the door closed with a ‘click’, he engaged the lock and turned towards the wall where empty shelves and hooks lined the wall.

She couldn’t help but stare as he methodically started to undress. Cufflinks, tie, then he sat down to remove his shoes and socks. So intent on her voyeurism she jumped, startled, when he spoke. “I suggest that if want your clothing to be serviceable enough to wear ever again you start undressing. Because when I’m done, I’m coming for you. And when I get over there, your clothing will meet their untimely end.” His voice was a low growl.

The warmth in the pit of her stomach had been in place since he threatened a prince of Dubai. But with his words it spread like a wildfire.

Her flush could be felt throughout her entire body. Her breaths were labored and she flung her clothing off in compliance, not taking a single ounce of care that they would likely end up wrinkled beyond repair.

She was undressed first, her chest heaving as she waited for him to turn to her.

He remained turned from her, his hands on his hips as he too, took audible huffs of air into his lungs.

“Get on the bed, Lizzie.”

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter, every dirty word is smut. Tiny bit of fluff, but that's it. If that's not your thing, do not continue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again. warning: SMUT ahead. Seriously. Not joking here..
> 
> Disclaimed, as always.

_‘Get on the bed, Lizzie’_

Oh sweet baby Jesus, she was never going to live through this. Already she could feel her moisture between her thighs.

She licked her lips, unsure of herself for the first time, and climbed on the bed. She wished she could be more graceful, more seductive, but there were many things that as a sighted person, she was unsure of.

As she waited for Red to react, she decided to take comfort where she could and close her eyes, try to regulate her breathing.

“Open your eyes, sweetheart. No hiding allowed.”

She complied instantly. She had no idea what he wanted her to do next, but she didn’t have enough moisture left in her mouth to speak. So she waited.

It wasn’t long before he was naked and looking down at her, appraising her body with the eyes of an expert. He knew her body and knew exactly how to make it hum. Here, he was the maestro and she his instrument.

He smiled. “Show me what makes you feel good Lizzie. Use that magnificent sense of touch of yours to show me exactly what you like. Touch yourself. Pretend I’m not even here. You can even close your eyes if you need to.” His voice was much softer, but still deep and rich.

She couldn’t lie to herself, she was a little intimidated by this facet of the man she loved. This man who had gone out of his way to show her nothing but gentle devotion. But this man, Red Reddington, he was calling the shots and knew exactly how it would affect her.

Before she knew it, her right hand trailed down her body sensuously, stopping to pay attention to her breasts before continuing on its journey south.

She didn’t close her eyes though. She wanted to see just how big of an impact she was having on him.

When she saw that he wasn’t the cool, collected man he was trying to project, she felt emboldened. Her fingers slipped between her folds to rub gentle circles around her clit. Her left hand came up to pinch lightly at her nipples.

His breath was heaving, nostrils flared. His right hand came around to the front of him to palm his impressive erection. She was spellbound, mesmerized, as she watched him pump himself from root to tip.

Her moan escaped, unbidden, as all of her muscles tightened in response to seeing him so uncontrolled. It devastated her own control. She wasn’t going to last so she slowed to a near stop, hoping that he would take the hint and join her on the bed.

What she didn’t anticipate was his growled “Don’t you dare stop. Finish it.”

With a whimper, her hands sped up. He knelt beside her prone body on the bed, his hand never leaving his cock. “Come for me Lizzie.”

She groaned “Oh god, Raymond, please. I need to feel you inside of me. Please.”

 

 

 

She was glorious. He wanted nothing more than to position himself in between those long, lithe legs and get so deep inside of her that he wouldn’t be able to tell where he ended and she began. He wanted to kiss every inch of her body. But most of all, he wanted to hold her. Watching her walk away and into the waiting hands of a psychotic murderer was one of the hardest things he’d had to do.

They’d been through so much together already. He wondered countless times if she wouldn’t be better off going back to her old life. He knew that he’d told her that she could never go back, but nothing was impossible when you had the connections he had.

But looking at the smooth contours of her body, her hands, one at her breast and one at her clit, was the most erotic sight he’d ever had the pleasure of viewing. Every second of fear, of heartache and worry, all of it was well worth it when presented with this.

It would be his job, no, his pleasure, to do everything in his power to ensure she felt the same way. Until the end of forever.

The small, breathy gasps leaving her swollen lips were coming closer together now, she was so close. Her right hand, so small and well-manicured, moved impossibly fast as she neared her orgasm.

“Raymond, I love you so much!” He licked his lips. He couldn’t hold back anymore. He nuzzled her left hand out of the way and closed his mouth over her nipple, rolled it between his teeth and sucked it as hard as he dared. Her free hand clutched at his head, her nails dug delicious little half-moons on the back of his neck.

She shattered with a scream. Her legs shaking, her scream turned to a moan that signaled him to let go of her breast. Her nipples were sensitive from her orgasm and he had more plans for them later.

Peppering open kisses up her clavicle and neck to where he finally reached her face. It had a dreamy quality to it that made him feel more than a little proud of his ability to put that look on her face.

Although she did most of the work that time. He huffed a laugh at his internal joke and her hand tightened on his neck again. Just a slight pressure, but it was no longer relaxed. “Are you laughing at me?”

“You must not be too worried about it, you haven’t even opened your eyes.” He knew his voice sounded strained, but he was so damned hard that poking a hole into the mattress was a very real possibility. He wanted her so badly, but he’d give her all the time she needed.

“Oh, you think so? Well then, I guess I’ll just go to sleep, I’m nice and tired.” She exaggerated a yawn and pretended to move as if to roll over.

“I’m about to give that smart mouth something to do if you don’t behave. If you must know, I was in awe, positively stupefied at how beautiful you are.”

Serious now, she opened her eyes and he nearly gasped. He’d never seen them shine with such a brilliant hue. “As I demonstrated earlier today, I am more than happy to utilize my smart mouth. However, I really just need to feel you inside of me. In fact, I’m done waiting.”

She hooked her leg around him and pushed him to his back. She held his arms above his head and straddled him “There’s a new sheriff in town. Got that?”

Her little body was surprisingly strong. Her core was sliding up and down his straining erection and he thought he would lose it right then and there. There was definitely something to be said about having Lizzie on top.

Her stretched above him gave him perfect access to her sensitive nipples. Two could play that game.

Finally, she stilled. She grabbed him and guided him inside of her, but didn’t slide down past the tip. He wanted so badly to move his hips and burry himself in her warmth.

“Get this show on the road, Sheriff. You’re losing daylight. You want to control this, you need to skedaddle or the bronc may lose control.”

He knew his arms shook with restraint. She was so wet, so tight, so hot her walls scorched a trail down his cock. The pace she set was a slow one.

She laughed at him and he was sure his eyes crossed at how tight she became when she laughed. But her laughter abruptly cut off as she worked over him, sliding in further with every passing second. “God, you’re so big from this angle. It’s-oh god!”

He tried to concentrate on her words, but he was lost in her. His moan was a pleasurable agony as she finally took the rest of him.

Once accustomed to his girth, she rose up on her knees above him, until he was barely inside of her. He thought she would go slower, but she slammed back down so hard, so fast that he shouted in pleasure.

Again and again she repeated her movements. With no rhyme or reason to her rhythm, it was like riding a roller coaster, reaching the top and that small pause that you never knew how long would last. Time seemed to stop then and she held his arms above him still so he devoured her with his mouth and then his eyes.

Watching his cock disappear inside of her and the accompanying sensations were too much. And he’d be damned if he got off before making sure that she went with him.

“Lizzie, let go. I am going to need my hands.” He could have moved them at any time, but he wished to let her have the illusion of control.

When she answered, she was panting “You don’t…need them… I’m so close… just-“

Her eyes clenched shut as she stopped the longer strokes in favor of grinding against him. Her walls quivered around him. She was just as close as he was.

Her face was so close, he couldn’t help but catch her lips in a searing kiss that he only pulled back from to make sure she remembered to breathe.

She let go of his hands and he immediately moved them down to her hips, holding her while he pounded harder into her.

“Ride me, Lizzie. I love you sweetheart. Let go. Fly apart. Come on, love. You feel so amazing wrapped around me, I can’t wait another second.”

She cried out above him as he felt the tell-tale tingle at the base of his spine. He tried not to roar in her ear as he followed her into heaven.

He was so in love with her, he didn’t care if they were stuck together with sweat and evidence of their pleasure, he just blurted “So where would you like to get married?”

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a little afraid and blushing more than a little, but let me know what you think.


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A happily ever after...or is it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its taken me so long to update! I am writing away, I just forget to update things. I get lost in the worlds I create, I suppose:) Thank you for your continued support!
> 
> Disclaimed, as always.

He winced. Honestly, he meant to wait. Make a grand gesture at the misty, floating mountains in Asia. While nibbling on her neck amongst the vines in Italy. He’d have even preferred to say it while hiking to the summit of Machu Picchu. Anything to save him from the disgrace of blurting out an assumption like that and casing him to sound like an absolute buffoon.

It took so long for her to answer him that he was genuinely starting to worry. He knew that she loved him, but he couldn’t contain his racing heart or thoughts of what he would do if she said no.

“Calm down. I can feel you heart beating. I’m not going to say no. I’m just surprised that you didn’t have this all planned out to the nth degree. I’m actually really proud of you for going for spontaneity. Now, to answer your question, I have no idea. Before I went blind, I had this idea of grand gothic style cathedral in a stupid fluffy gown. Don’t you dare laugh at me, it was the early nineties, Sam thought that because I was a girl the only movies I’d like to watch were Disney ones.”

She kissed him full on the mouth until the tension left him and he moaned in appreciation.

He was ready to shelf the discussion in order to pursue other endeavors, like licking her head to toe. But she spoke again.

“I love you,” she said with a small shrug “Anywhere you are and we are together. Those are my only requirements. The ring, the dress, the venue, all of those things aren’t what really matters. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and if we get married barefoot in a field of wildflowers or dressed to the nines in a fourteenth century monastery with scenery to rival to heaven itself, it won’t be what I’m worried about. We can say the words right here and now and I will still be committed to you. Forever.”

He couldn’t think, barely remembered to breathe. In fact, he felt so light-headed that he probably wasn’t so successful with the breathing part.

“I will cherish you all the rest of my days, Lizzie. I can’t even picture myself, who I was before I met you. It’s all dark and empty. You have given me light, a purpose…but you’ve also healed me. I don’t,” he cleared his throat to dislodge the knot there “I don’t hate the person /I am when I am with you. You make me want to be a better man, so that one day I can be worthy of you.”

She hugged him tight, sobbed against my shoulder. “Ugh, I am a slobbering mess now. Why are you so wonderful!” she nearly wailed. It wasn’t a question, it was a statement. It made him chuckle.

“It’s you. You are what makes me wonderful.”

 

*****

 

She sat on the balcony, sipping her coffee in just sleep shorts and a miniscule tank top thrown on after leaving him sleeping peacefully. Be for she dresses, she drank in the sight of him, wanted to look at him forever, but Red needed to go out and she wouldn’t make him cross his legs for longer than necessary.

She had no idea what she was going to tell him. Or how.

In the two years since they married, they’d spent every single day together. Every night too. Each one spent was another day in Utopia. Their perfect world.

Which was crumbling around her feet.

She hated even thinking of leaving. But she needed to do it without him knowing. The states were a seventeen hour flight away and she had no conceivable idea how she could offer an excuse to justify what he would see as a betrayal. She needed to go alone, to suffer in silence. To spare him from the heartache to come.

She knew that staying with him, telling him her problems, having another shoulder to bear the burden of pain would be all too easy for her.

But it wouldn’t be easy on him. And when they said their vows, she promised to love him more than she loved herself. Breaking his heart would hurt him. It was her job to protect him.

The plan she came up with was simple enough. He rode out with the property manager every day to make sure that their vineyard was operating at its peak. Making sure all the employees and their families were taken care of. Answering countless questions from any number of people. He reveled in it. People were his forte, not hers. She loved the families and the children running around. Everyone was wonderful.

But she’s been going out less and less. She used the heat as an excuse, but that wasn’t really the issue, and it wouldn’t be long before he called her out on it.

Her musing were interrupted by the man himself. He hugged her from behind and nuzzled into her neck, leaving a trail of feather light kisses up to her ear where he knew she was sensitive as hell. She squealed, tried to get away, but he held tight and wouldn’t let her escape him.

She shrieked and put her hands up to tickle his armpits where he was so sensitive. After she dug her thumbs into him there, he let go. “Alright, alright, you sure don’t play fair.”

He sat next to her and grabbed her hand with a “Good morning, love.” His voice never failed to make her skin tingle.

“Morning” Damn she hated to start off his day like this. If she put it off any longer she was going to vomit.

“I’m leaving. Just for a few days. I have some errands to run stateside and I’ll be back in three days, tops.”

He stilled. He didn’t tense, but he was frozen just the same and when he spoke his words were measured, careful. “Sure sweetheart, where do you need to go? We haven’t been off the vineyard or out of the municipality for months. We can make a trip out of it.”

His natural refusal to process anything that doesn’t involve them as a collective unit was what she loved most about him. He was her best friend.

She swallowed “I’m going to take this one alone, hon. I’ll take Red though if that will make you feel better.” She was going to take Red no matter what. She’d need the extra security.

The hurt in his voice tore at her. It was the very last thing she wanted to do.

To lighten the mood she said “You know you want to plan another party for Friday night. I’ll be back well before then.”

Her attempt fell flat. He was so serious when he said “Is there anything that I can help you with to get ready?” God he was so sweet. She knew he was just being himself, but it was making her feel even more like shit.

She stood, ready to be done so she could leave and wallow in her self-loathing in peace. “No thank you. I love you.”

The phone calls she needed to make could wait until she was up in the air. Red accidentally hearing her conversations was the last thing she needed.

On her way to the closet, she tripped over the seat of her vanity table, swearing at her clumsiness.

In the closet, she grabbed the few things she might need and hoped she wouldn’t have to buy anything she’d missed.

Where the hell was her luggage? She placed it in the middle of the bed and it was no longer there.

She heard the floor squeak by the doorway and swung around, ready for a fight. Things were not going as she’d hoped and she couldn’t find everything and she needed to get out of here and cry.

“I’ll just go without my luggage. See you in a few days, bye.” She attempted to pass him without him stopping her.

No such luck. He stepped right in front of her and held her by the shoulders. By his breathing she could tell that he was mad. “Why didn’t you tell me, Lizzie? Why hide it?” Scratch that. He wasn’t mad, he was furious. He shook her with every word.

“I need answers. I’m going to get them.”

After a deep breath, his voice was calmer, but it was deceptively so. She could feel the emotions vibrating through him “You know, when we got married, we signed on to be partners, in everything. I know exactly what ‘for better or worse’ means. Do you?”

Tears spilled out onto her cheeks as she sagged against him, sobbing. “I’m so sorry. I love you so much. I love you more than my own happiness. Do _you_ know what _that_ means?”

He swooped her up and cradled her against his pounding heartbeat. “It means that you assume that I could ever survive without you.” He paused, his voice a low, rumbling whisper “Why didn’t you tell me you were losing your sight again?”

 

**Tbc….**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think.


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time has passed, but Liz has a problem. A problem that she's determined to solve without Red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second to last chapter. I'll post the last chapter tomorrow. Thank you for your support and sticking with this. You guys are amazing!
> 
> Disclaimed, as always.

She knew it was impossible to believe for a second that he wouldn’t know what was going on. He knew her better than she knew herself. He’d always been amazingly perceptive, but their time together had only honed his skills. Especially when it concerned her.

She tried to regulate her breathing, to calm down so her explanation sounded at least a little bit rational “What if it’s gone? Forever, Ray. We may be relatively safe, but the fact of the matter is, me being blind is a huge liability and I need to know if there’s something to be done for it. My sight came back once, it could happen again.”

She knew she sounded shrill, desperate even. But the past two years, Red had shown her how absolutely beautiful life could be and she would do anything to keep that.

He held her until she was somewhat calm. “I want to show you something. We’re going to take a field trip.” His voice was calm, such a distinct contrast to her panic that she focused on it, let his calm demeanor spread to her.

So he led her to the library and said “Close your eyes. Keep them closed.” She wondered what he could possibly show her that she hadn’t already seen. They’d spent countless hours in here, made love against and on top of just about every surface, even the floor.

They came to a stop at one of the countless shelves. His hand travelled slowly down her arm until it reached the tips of her fingers. So slowly in fact, that she thought that maybe they would be utilizing one or more of the surfaces soon. But instead of continuing the sensual touch, he handed her a book.

“Remember, no peeking. Just feel.” So she ran her hands over the binding first, searching for telltale raised print, but found braille instead. It was ‘Pride and Prejudice’, her favorite novel!

She couldn’t keep her eyes closed a second longer. When she opened them, the library looked the exact same as it usually did, but they were in front of the book shelf that she’d previously assumed was his. She ran her hands over the countless spines before her.

Hundreds, possibly a thousand or more books in braille. “Oh my god! How long have you have these?”

His shoulders raised and lowed in a slow shrug. “I guess I bought that first one after the second morning we sat together. The others were ordered or commissioned in the weeks after that. There’s also a few hundred audiobooks, as well. Field trip isn’t over yet though, so let’s go to my office.”

Just one doorway down the corridor, his office was actually where he held conference calls and Skype meetings for all of his business that was entirely legitimate these days. She had a computer in here as well, to her delight.

They were both terrible with technology. She had caught on quickly and soon he’d been going to her when he had problems. There were new boxes stacked in the corner and a new computer sitting next to her laptop. Squinting at the accessories, she saw that it was an entire set up to accommodate her blindness.

Everything was braille compatible. The computer screen was small, purely existing for diagnostic purposes and so it could be used by a sighted person. There was a flat, wide rectangular box with small holes dotting along the surface next to the braille keyboard. She wasn’t sure what the flat box was though.

Still shocked, she could only whisper “What’s this one?”

Up until that point, he’d been a silent observer, standing back while she explored. “It’s a braille display. There are pins that come up and translate everything that is on the screen into braille. There’s also a braille printer.” He seemed less confident as usual. Maybe he was waiting for her anger.

As soon as she’s done falling in love with him all over again she’ll be upset for the frivolous cost of everything.

The books alone had to be eight thousand plus. There was probably twenty grand in the technological equipment.

Wait. That equipment had been new. She turned around and walked out of the office without a word.

If her suspicions were correct, he had a reason to be wary of her anger.

He followed, she knew he’d be too curious at her abrupt departure. She walked into the kitchen and yanked open a cupboard. The contents were unchanged as far as she could tell, but she reached up to the shelves and found that they were labeled in braille.

“You knew. You knew that I was having problems and you were doing everything that you could to make your world, our world accommodate that, weren’t you?” Her arms came up and she hugged her shoulders in an effort to hold herself together.

She felt foolish for _ever_ thinking that she could do this without him.

But then his arms enveloped her and she was shaking and crying against him. “Lizzie, there is nothing that I wouldn’t do to make your life easier. How could you doubt that for even a second? Is that why you were going to go alone? Because you believe that if I went I would make you feel like you were a bother?”

She felt so guilty for trying to leave without him, but she couldn’t let him believe that for a second longer. “I could never think that of you. I wanted to go alone so that I could find out if there was hope, if there was a chance that maybe something could be done. I wanted to protect you from, well hope. That sounds so stupid right now saying it out loud, but it’s the truth. I know that me being blind again will crush you. You’ll somehow find a way to bear the burden of fault, but it’s only because of you that I could see again in the first place. And maybe I wanted to fall apart in private. To make it easier to be brave for you.”

 

*****

He knew that she’d been having trouble with her vision for weeks. As a man that has studied every nuance, every expression on her face, he knew exactly when she started squinting to see objects not close to her. When her hip would bump into a table or ledge because she overestimated how close it was. He silently observed every single detail and waited for her to come to him and share her fears. But he waited in vain. She was so terrified that she wouldn’t be enough, he would have laughed if it didn’t make him so angry.

It was laughable to think that a career criminal was more deserving than an angel, no matter how clean he kept his nose these days.

Since he wasn’t much one to wait, he started his research. Spoke with world renowned experts on the technological advances in aiding those without vision. All of the accommodations that she’d explained so long ago were at the fore of his mind. He never wanted her to feel trapped in a world of darkness.

The moisture of her tears soaked though his shirt and he felt honored to be loved so well. She was only trying to protect him.

Her weight was slight as he swung her up into his arms and carried her to their room to rest. She needed him to be there for her and show her that no matter what, they would be fine. Her sniffles slowed to the occasional rough breath and he sighed in relief.

There were so many arrangements to be made, but for right now, they would stay in their safe haven. Lizzie needed him. Everything else could wait.

She’d been his light for so long, he could be no less for her.

 

**Tbc…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think.


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happily Ever After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final chapter and I am so in love with this story, I am hesitant to end it. One day, if the plot bunny bites, I’ll maybe write a sequel. Your feedback and kind words have carried me through this very, very long process and I appreciate you so much! Thank you!!!  
> Disclaimed, as always.

The next few days were a flurry of activity. Liz had walked into more than a few pieces of furniture and so returned to utilizing her good friend Red who’d resumed his new role with gusto.

A little too much if you asked Liz. Red had growled and snapped at human Red at first. Both were hovering like mother hens and Red the dog had no tolerance for the Concierge of Crime taking over his job.

She was appalled, but Raymond just crouched down on his haunches, gave him some attention, and defended him with “Lizzie, he’s just adjusting to the change and getting back into the working mindset. He’s going a little above and beyond, that’s normal. I am very impressed with his memory. I was afraid we’d have to get you a new companion.”

Relieved that he was being so understanding about almost losing a digit or three, but still horrified that he would think of getting rid of her friend, she couldn’t hold back her snapped reply “I don’t need another companion. We’re not getting rid of Red. Why would you suggest that?” She knew she sounded hysterical, but with everything going on and her trying to adjust to being sightless once again, the stress was overwhelming her.

She heard him sigh and step closer right before she was enfolded into a tight embrace “I know this is torture for you, but please know that I am working on it. We have Barnes’ notes from the serum he injected you with. We’ve tested the serum itself and we have it ready for testing.”

Her breath caught “You have a guinea pig right here, I’m ready. I’m more than ready. You would be waiting forever for a duplicate test simulation. Don’t you dare blind a bunch of rats just to test it! When can we leave?”

There were no other options. He had to understand that she needed to see, was not ready to give up her sight. She knew she was being selfish and should be thankful that she’d had the time that she did. The truth was, she wasn’t ready to give up looking at him. Already he was just a blurry shape and the thought of never looking into his eyes again made her want to scream and claw her skin off.

He’d never understand. He couldn’t. She knew that he was worried about her and would do whatever it took to get her well again, but he couldn’t feel the desperation coursing through her veins. He wouldn’t want strangers in their home, so she’d have to go off site to a private hospital, maybe.

“We can leave tomorrow.” He sighed, knowing that she would find a way, with or without him. Having a finite time gave her the opportunity to breath and relax. She was more than ready.

 

*****

 

Lizzie was settled in and hooked up to multiple monitors to ensure her safety. It might be over-kill, but he really didn’t give a damn.

Truth be told, he didn’t want her to be here at all. So many uncontrollable variables amounted in a shot in the dark that could kill her. He knew that she was desperate to see again, but not at the cost of the possible side effects.

But his love for her was greater than the pain he felt at her coming to harm. He would give her anything. Even if his heart was ripped from his chest in the process.

His pain was inconsequential. And it would be nothing compared to how she would feel if this didn’t work.

The past twenty-four hours he’d seen hope written all over her face. But hope was such an insidious companion. He didn’t hope for anything but her good health.

Internally, he was torn. When they’d made love last night, it was beyond anything they’d experienced to date, in his opinion. Which was hard to fathom because every delectable, sinful second was better than the last throughout the entire course of their relationship.

Lizzie, with her vision so deteriorated, was so tactile, so attentive that he’d never felt so much. Emotion was behind every touch, every kiss, and he felt like a selfish ass for wanting more of that. With her fingertips not only conveying her emotion to him, but providing her with the means of reading his nonverbal emotions as well, he’d been to heaven on earth.

Blind or not, all he wanted was for her to be happy. But he would worry ceaselessly either way. His life was not one lived in a care free manner. Deeds of the past could still become an unwelcome visitor.

He was brought out of his musings by his physician moving towards the love of his life with a syringe that would change their lives irrevocably forever.

Their hands clasped tightly together, he’d positioned his body as close as he could without being in the way. He kissed her temple and whispered how much he loved her. The tension was vibrating from within her and he did everything he could to calm her. He was unsuccessful until he’d fastened his mouth over hers and gestured for the doctor to proceed. She softened against him and didn’t even have time to tense up before it was done.

She glared at him “You tricked me,” she said, still too breathless to put any heat behind her words.

He just gave her a grin that he knew she couldn’t see, but would reflect in his voice “Absolutely. Don’t complain, you loved it, Mrs. Reddington.”

“Oh, I more than enjoyed it, Mr. Reddington.” Her soft smile and sigh was well worth the raging erection, especially since he’d have no relief until much later.

A thought struck “Lizzie, let’s go on vacation. I want to visit all of the places that I had reserved for before your sight returned. Switzerland is beautiful this time of year. Just after dawn, the smells of the bakeries and the chocolatiers are astounding. Like nothing else in the world.”

She leaned into him, so happy to have him as her rock, her support throughout this entire mess. She never doubted that he would be there for her, not for a second. What she did doubt was her worth, but she would overcome her doubts. She refused to let fear prohibit her from living her life.

“So the Alps, huh? That means we can go skiing, right?” She was smiling, but her tone was entirely serious. Given the extreme activities she’d participated in to date, he had little doubt that she was joking.

“I suppose, if we stayed on the bunny hills, but only because I’m old and have no wish to tear a tendon like I did in Nepal. Rehab takes forever and I’m not willing to risk our vacation for fun.”

He would die if something happened to her. If she would take it easier on the slopes thinking that it will help him, so be it.

He really did have a torn tendon, he just didn’t tell her that it was aided by a knife. He’d take the hit to his pride any day to save her neck from treacherous slopes.

Her sense of adventure was such an integral part of her, he never wanted to hold her back. However, he still wanted her to be around in twenty years. Sometimes, those ideals were mutually exclusive.

 

*****

 

Later that day, Liz couldn’t help but smile as she listened to her wonderful husband talking to Red and praising him for being a good dog for growling at their copilot because he looked at her wrong. They were so adorable, the man and the dog both.

The possibility of falling more and more in love with someone each day was a concept that she could hardly fathom a few years ago. With Raymond Reddington, she’d found not just a love that knew no limits, but a friend and companion that made her laugh and thank her lucky stars. He made her so happy, she knew she grinned like a fool all the time she just couldn’t help it.

She had been blind to more than the world around her. Before his sass drew her in at a coffee shop, she had been merely existing, not truly living. He had given her more than her sight, he gave her a new life.

He was right when he told her that whatever the future held, they would meet it head on, and hand in hand.

As she walked across the jet’s cabin to settle in his lap, she knew that the arms that came around her would hold her forever.

She nibbled his neck, right below his ear. The tightening of his arms and the deep, answering growl sent shivers down her spine.

“Why don’t we renew our membership to the mile high club?”

He stood so quickly, that if he hadn’t been holding her against him, she would have fallen to the floor.

 

**The End…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much I know I kind of left it open at the end, but you know. Maybe a sequel later on.   
> Let me know what you think.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!


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